Wedding Blog

My bf and I were just talking about we think (no offense to anyone) it’s kinda weird to call the future in-laws by their first names. I guess especially in Asian cultures, we’re just so trained to be “respectful to elders”, so addressing them by their names are considered inappropriate. But defintiely, it’s weird too to all of a sudden have to call someone “Mom” and “Dad” when they’re not related by blood to you. A toughie….

this is a very tricky one! best thing to do is to ask your parents and in-laws. my FIL made it very clear he wanted to be called “Dad.” this is very hard for me to do since i am so close with my own dad. i initially wanted to call him some other form of “dad” - like “Papa G” as my future SIL calls him (which he also seems to like), but, he asked me to call him “Dad” It’s hard to do– but you can see it hurts him when i don’t and happy when i do. So it’s a lil uncomfortable at first, but hey.. he likes me and he wouldnt ask me to call him “Dad” if he truly didnt feel happy to have me join the family. and if they ask you to you something– use it… cuz they notice when you don’t and will tell your husband that your wife doesn’t address her/MIL with a proper term (sheesh-my bad!)

that’s easy. its going to be ohmoneem and abuhneem. but i think it’s going to feel weird when i actually have to say it!

it would be endearing and a sign of respect for your husband to call your parents uhmoneem and ahbuhneem (in korean) even as a non-korean. it shows that he is part of the family and that he respects their korean culture.
my mom’s friend’s son married a Puerto Rican woman who totally won her MIL and FIL over by calling them by the traditional korean titles. my mom agreed that it was the proper thing to do, unless your parents don’t want that.
and plus, I would do the same if I married into a CHinese family, Latin family, etc… I would refer to my parents-in-law in their language.

I tried, I just don’t feel comfortable doing that. Usually I try to avoid calling them anything. I think I am going to start going with their first names though. They said they would be okay with either.

I have misgivings about calling my FILs mom and dad. I don’t feel close to them. My FI only sees them twice a year. So I’m not going to call them anything until we have kids. Then, I’ll go by what my kids call them. In the meantime, I plan to avoid calling them anything.

My FI is planning to call my parents their appropriate Chinese title for in-laws. He has a tough time pronouncing it, but he’s been practicing.

i agree with isabella -
i answered “yes” to the survey in reference to calling my FIL “ahbunneem” & “umuhneem” - the respectful version of “dad” & “mom” in korean~

That is a very interesting topic you touched upon. I am a Korean girl myself dating someone who is not Korean for the first time. Did your parents have a hard time initially with that fact of different races/nationalities? I wouldn’t be worrying except that this relationship is starting to get a bit serious. To add to that, he is also much older than I am!

My FFIL invited me to call him Dad. I don’t call my own father Dad. I explained that I was honoured but that it would feel strange to me, and probably extremely weird for my own father. He was surprised - but really, I don’t think I could. Ever.