Mr. Ant and I are both very passionate, stubborn, opinionated, outspoken, and competitive. There’s a lot of fire between the two of us, and it inevitably leads to a lot of fights. But we love the way we challenge each other and help each other learn and grow.
Not every conflict gets resolved (Hello! He’s a Republican in finance who lives by logic while I’m a Democrat in medical research who lacks common sense and is ruled by my emotions).. but sometimes we just have to agree to disagree.
I wouldn’t have it any other way. I’d much rather fight with Mr. Ant for the rest of my life than to settle for some boring Yes-man who can’t think or stand up for himself or a clone of myself who won’t challenge or push me in any way.
Interestingly, we almost NEVER argue about what most other couples argue about (money, sex, family, how to spend our time, etc). Despite all of our battles, we actually have a lot in common. We share the same off-beat sense of humor and enjoy many of the same things. For example, we’re both addicted to board games (Risk or Monopoly, anyone?) and watching 24 and Law & Order, coincidentally two conflict-driven dramas. Hahaha! I suppose we are just competitive and conflict-driven people.
As much as we both enjoy a good adrenaline pumping fight, that’s not to say that we don’t want our relationship to improve. Of course we are both working on becoming more mature, considerate, patient, tolerant, and so forth. Our relationship is a work in progress. To us, it’s already a masterpiece… but we are determined to make it even better and stronger every day.
Oh, and our fiery dynamics are certainly NOT recommended for every couple, especially not the faint-hearted or sensitive types. If a peaceful relationship works for you- great! We are just not those types of people. Everyone has different needs. We found what works for us.
What kind of dynamics work for you?
i love your posts, miss ant! you sound like such a mature and level-headed young woman. your fiance is one lucky man!