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Mrs. Bee and I are here out in LA visiting her family (aka my in-laws).
I talked with her dad earlier this year about calling him “Dad”, but I haven’t done it yet this trip (OK, ever). I am sure it will pop out some time naturally. But so far, it has been great to spend time with Papa Bee and Mama Bee. I got really lucky: I like my in-laws a lot, and enjoy visiting LA and spending time with Bee’s fam.
The hardest part of the trip actually has been Mrs. Bee’s blogger’s block. We are sitting in a Starbucks in Rowland Heights CA (paying $10 a day for wifi!!!), and Bee hasn’t been able to get in a groove. We came out to California for my business trip, so I must apologize to Weddingbee readers for the reduced bloggage!
Anyway on the subject of in-laws, I think parents/in-laws are one of the single biggest factors in wedding stress. If you get along with them, than wedding planning is tough but doable. But if you don’t, then wedding planning can explode into something horrifically stressful.
Are your in-laws affecting your wedding planning?
Mine aren’t really hindering it at all–besides them being two more people to try and keep up-to-date on our progress, that is. FMIL has actually been really, really helpful and has volunteered her services however she can–it’s just a shame they live five hours away! Since their daughter probably isn’t going to be getting married (at least, not anytime soon), they’re really giving our wedding their all. They’re hosting the rehearsal dinner(traditional), and are really going above and beyond, making sure they don’t add any unnecessary stress on our shoulders–that must be where my fiance got it from: he’s planning our whole honeymoon all by himself! 
my in-laws-to-be aren’t too bad. it’s my own dang parents who are unbearable. my mother refuses to let me do the wedding the way I want, and insists that certain korean traditions MUST be a part of the ceremony and reception, whereas my reaction is “hellz no.” we’ve kinda hit a brick wall..
my fiance’s family are pretty supportive and i have no problems there, it’s my own mother that’s stressing me out! she wants me to have a “perfect wedding.”
my in-laws are awesome!!!! i love them to pieces and consider myself very very blessed.
mr and mrs bee, come visit me!
i only live 20 min from rowland heights!
My future in-laws don’t really care! When we told them they didn’t ask what the date was! They didn’t even say they were going to attend!
They are great– I love them!
Bean and Waiszie, I know just what you mean!!! My parents had their own wedding on an extremely limited budget, so now my mom is trying to create HER dream wedding with no regard for MY feelings. Dad is behind me all the way, but neither of us know what to do about Mom–some of her ideas are nice and good, but every time I want to do something she doesn’t like she gets all pouty and won’t talk to either of us. ::rolls eyes::. Fiance and his family are wisely staying out of it, but my patience with Mom is really starting to wear out–we have VERY different ideas of what constitutes a nice wedding, and she’s not the one getting married!
his mother didnt want him to marry me (a fortuneteller said bad things would happen if he did - not because of any REAL reason mind you) so we eloped. i don’t talk to her now, nor will i ever. i don’t even regard her as my MIL because no mother should ever be that cruel.
my future in-laws are angels. they are letting us do whatever we want. we just have to let them where & when!
my father on the other hand has been stressing my FI out. he outrageously went over the allotted number of ppl we gave him to invite. lucky for me, i’m having my reception at a big chinese banquet hall that can manage to accomodate this mess! now my FI just has to open his wallet a little wider!!
rowland heights? I’m originally from diamond bar, its the next town over! could it be the starbucks on colima, w/ the supermarket and the mcdonalds…. ahh the memories..
The main way my in-laws will be affecting my cermeony and reception is we will be adding on the cost of security to our wedding.
Seriously.
His mother and father are divorced and the father remarried many years ago. His mother and father hate each other virulently still to this day, and will not hesitate to act on their feelings.
Seriously. I have been a witness.
And Mr. Rose and I have decided that we will not hesitate to have either or both of them escorted out if they chooose to act a fool at our wedding.
His father is a big man (6′2″, 320 lbs.), so we will need some serious security for him. His mother is no slouch either.
It’s a shame, but this is how it has to be. And after 5 years of great marriage to her son, his mother dislikes me as much as she dislikes the father, and won’t hesitate to act on that feeling as well.
I just really hope everyone brings their meds and takes them, so we can all have a good time.
I still remember the story Mrs. Bee told on her xanga about the first time you met her parents and all those tough questions her father asked you…
I get along fine with my fiance’s mother, and his dad isn’t really in his life, and I haven’t even met him.
So I don’t think it’ll really be a problem. His mom likes me.
My future in laws are basically completely insane, but the good news is that they aren’t helping with the wedding at all. The bad news is, they won’t help with things that I need from them such as their extended family’s names, number of children, and addresses. They just ignore my requests. I don’t get it. I think I will probably just end up contacting my fiance’s grandparents to see if they can help with that, cuz my fiance has no clue about all of that stuff.
my parents wanted to invite like 200 people… what the?!? but we compromised @ 60 guest… the in-laws had leass than 2 tables of family members & friends…
my hubbs is taiwanese & i’m korean… i think it’s so cute when my hubbs call my parents “ummah” & “ahbah”
o my gosh, this is so funny that you’ve mentioned this because unfortunately, i am going through my hellish ordeal involving in-laws as we speak.
I will politely say that there have been some difficult moments, but all parents (mine and his) are clearly well intentioned, albeit often opinionated and occasionally difficult.
(tactful, right?)
My fiance’s parents live out of the country so basically it’s just my family trying to get things together right now. They’re planning to come in September so hopefully they will be able to have some input then. It kinda sucks that they’re not here able to help us out. Or is it a good thing? =P
I’ve just finished being the evil in-law to my brother’s now wife (as of last weekend). The girl made no attempt to be friendly with the family, apart from a few months around last christmas, which she later told us were pretend to get my mum to make her wedding dress. When my brother and her refused to send invitations or save the dates (despite it being in the middle of July and therefore holiday season) until 6 weeks before the wedding, she claimed this as a rift and rejected the wedding dress my mum had spent £600 on. Brides can be a handful too and incorporating new people into your lives who are determined to not accept the family that created the person they’re in love with can make being an in-law incredibly difficult.
I only wish that I could see the reasoning that makes my brother so happy with his choice.
How sad…
Hmm… We are planning our wedding ourselves and paying for it all, so no parent or in law input. Yeah!
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Mr. Bee Age and Occupation: 32, Internet Fiance's Age and Occupation: 28, Weddingbee Publisher/Editor Engagement Date: May 7, 2004 Wedding Date: March 5, 2005 Venue: Westside Loft, New York About Me: I am Mrs. Bee's husband.
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