Wedding Blog
Mr. Caterpillar and I attended the Sapuquezes’ wedding in mid August. By the end of August, we had a thank you note filled with lovely handwriting and heartfelt sentiments. Mr. Caterpillar and I are not the Sapuquezes. We have yet to write a single thank you note.
I’m tempted to blame our lack of thank you notes on our current homelessness, but I’m pretty sure more organized people would have just found a Starbucks in which to sit and write, throwing fear of artic air conditioning and repetitive stress injury to the wind. I suppose that the real problem is just not knowing where to start.
The Morning News has a great primer by Leslie Harpold, which breaks note writing into these steps:
1. Greet the Giver
2. Express Your Gratitude
3. Discuss Use
4. Mention the Past, Allude to the Future
5. Grace
6. Regards
Very useful.
But, what am I supposed to write to those who gave gifts that don’t really lend themselves to the 6 steps? Or particularly to Steps 2 and 3? We all know by now that I’m a bad person, so I’m just going to say it — some of our wedding gifts, I’m just not that grateful for. The 20-pound painted resin flower market/outdoor grocery scene in a frame? The single coffee saucer? The candy underpants? Right. Those things I’m just not full of gratitude about. So, really, thank you note writing is going to turn me into a gracious liar:
Dear X,
Thank you for the candy underpants. When thinking of a foundation upon which to build a home, I have always first thought of candy underpants. And now through your generosity, we have our very own candy underpants. We can’t wait to have you over and try them out. Thank you so much!
Love,
Miss Caterpillar
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Share this post: Lazy + Apartmentless = Thank You Note Morass
You made me LOL! Aren’t you lucky that your friends and loved ones care enough about you to give you candy underpants? 
hahaha, I have a feeling that whoever gave you the candy underpants might actually appreciate a note like that!!! 
but as for the other less-appealing gifts…just be vague “It was so kind of you to think of us and present us with such a lovely painting. We will always think fondly of you when we see it.” That is…when we open the closet and move the suitcase and see all the way in the back…
Totally agreed. I abhor writing thank you notes. Because I’m a writer, people expect these long heartfelt notes custom tailored to whatever it is they’ve presented us. And then I belabor it until I have JUST the right opening, JUST the right pithy thing to say about the saucer, and on and on …
My favorite dilemma, though, is how to thank someone when they bought you something off your registry. Of late, I’ve wanted to go with something like:
“Dear X,
Thank you for the lovely vase, which I selected and you paid for. I’m thrilled you gave us such a beautiful gift and that I was able to pick it out. Since your taste is questionable, now we’re sure to have something we’ll love for years to come. Great seeing you at the shower.
Love,
Bride.”
I have a book you can borrow with form thank yous for various types of gifts. want me to bring tonight? it makes it a lot easier.
hahaha
i’ve always wanted my own candy underpants. lol.
For a household item I didn’t much care for, I came up with (this isn’t exactly it, but you get the idea):
“It’s the little details that make a house a home [ true!]. The beautiful X you gave us [exaggeration for effect] will certainly help us create our home together [if we ever put it out]. Thank you for thinking of us. We can’t wait to see you soon.” Sadly, we will have to put X out because they are good friends of my fiance. Oh well. This was the gift that made him realize that my wanting to register was not selfish, but necessary.
If the candy underpants are real, maybe you could write:
Dear X
Your sense of humor has always been a hallmark of our friendship. We thought the candy underpants were just hilarious and a nice reminder of all that we’ve been through together. Thank you for thinking of us and making our wedding so special.
Best,
me
PS They were delicious
You could always regift them for the giver’s birthday and have it become a running gag, too.
This website really helps!!!
http://weddings.about.com/od/bridesandgrooms/a/thankyoucards.htm
p.s.mmmm starbucks
Any suggestions on how to creatively thank people for giving money?
oooh, candy underpants. you’re a lucky girl!
wow… who gives candy pants as wedding gifts? I would just thank them for their gift but more importantly, for them coming out and sharing your special day. cheesy but effective
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Mrs. Caterpillar, New York/CA
Age and Occupation in 06: 28, Corporate Attorney to be
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 29, Musician
Engagement Date: March 9, 2006
Wedding Date: September, 2006
Venue: Rooster Point
About Me: I don't like Jeff Koons, mushy corn, or the unnecessary diacritical marks the New Yorker adds to words like cooperative. Also, I'm an obsessive compulsive when it comes to crafts. And not just the ordinary kind of obsessive compulsive who needs to have everything even and aligned. No. I've gilded the heads of pins to make sure they looked properly antique. Gilded them. Then coated them in german glass glitter. I am that crazy.
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