Open Question: Which Wedding?

Open Question: Which Wedding?

October 18th, 2006 @ 12:23 pm by Open Question

I’m from a small town in upstate New York a little over an hour from Albany. Most of my extended family (50% of our wedding guests) live in the Albany area, while fh’s family and our friends are scattered about the country. I’m trying to decide between 3 areas for a venue and I’m concerned about how inconvenient it would be for guests.

Which of the following sounds like a wedding you would want to attend?

Albany
pros: all the benefits of a real city: a major airport, plenty of hotels, cabs (could probably get away w/o renting a car)
cons: kind of like weddings in every real city in the country

My Hometown
pros: a pretty easy highway-only drive from Albany; has 3 major chain hotels, a few bed and breakfasts, a couple motels; everything for the wedding could occur in town (it takes less than 10 min to drive from one side to the other); all of my college friends (I went to school in the Boston area) would actually see my hometown which I’m very fond of; could even call a cab in-town
cons: the venues in-town aren’t that exciting, the best is probably the local college which is cute, but the food isn’t that great

The Area Near My Hometown
pros: some absolutely beautiful historic venues
cons: ~30 min of driving on backroads from my hometown (almost 2 hours from the nearest airport); guests would mostly have to stay in my hometown because there aren’t many hotels outside of it; no public transportation

thanks,
joy

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5 Responses to “Open Question: Which Wedding?”

Guest

Della21

Maybe you could have the rehearsal dinner in your hometown and the reception in a historic venue near your hometown (and provide buses from hotels to the venue for your guests). That way you get a bit of everything you want. I grew up outside of Albany myself (and I got married in an old mansion about an hour and half from Albany), and I think the venues in Albany are kind of boring.

10/18/06 @ 12:58 pm (reply)

Guest

I didn’t vote because I couldn’t decide. As an out of town guest, I would probably want to attend the wedding in Albany, which would be most convenient….

However that’s a little hypocritical of me, as I live in NYC and am planning a wedding in the Hudson valley (about a 90 minute drive from NYC with no super convenient airports)…does this mean as a guest I wouldn’t want to attend my own wedding? haha. Maybe I guess.

You definitely raise a good question, and while I think it’s important to think about your guests needs/wants, it’s also important to achieve a balance between theirs and yours (wants/needs that is). I’m looking at it this way (selfish as it may be): everyone who actually comes to my wedding REALLY wants to be there, and has put out the extra effort to make it to that location. That said, we know we want a small wedding with close friends and family who won’t mind making the extra effort. (Am I subconsciously trying to keep the guest list small? probably).

Sorry for the rambling…so I’ve come up with my final answer: if I were one of your close friends/family, I wouldn’t complain about any inconvenience if it meant I could attend your wedding. So you should have it where you most want to have it.

Side note: we are also planning on having something (not sure what yet) to make life easier for the people who do attend..ie transportation for all from the hotel to the venue, room blocks, helping groups of people get together to rent cars to drive from NYC, transportation to/from the train station. We figure if they’re making the effort to get there, we should do what we can to make it a little easier.

Hope this helps, and good luck!

10/18/06 @ 1:31 pm (reply)

Guest

peachy

i vote either albany or your hometown…

… personally, i’ve been a guest at several out of town weddings, and it’s always very difficult to get around and if it’s somewhere out in the boonies, that usually translates to long drives and uncomfortable small talk w/ strangers and nothing to do but sit around all day in boredom…

could you take your engagement photos at the historical venues? i really don’t think your guests would appreciate the historical venues as much as you would.

10/18/06 @ 3:43 pm (reply)

Guest

Miss Blueberry

I voted for the hometown one, though the Albany one would be just fine, too.

Even though you said “the venues aren’t all that exciting” there’s still a lot you can do. Depending on what your budget looks like you could do sooo many different things to ensure that even for the guests from your hometown (who’ve seen the place before) will feel like it’s a unique wedding.

If the venue choice is that much of a concern to you, though, have you looked at alternatives? I don’t know the area, but maybe there are local parks or pretty city grounds?

I lol’d about the food at the college…if it’s catered by Sodexho (the people who cater/provide the food at my college), I’d be scared. Well, not really all *that* scared, but…you know. hehehe

10/18/06 @ 5:30 pm (reply)

Guest

linnybride

yes, people who want to be there will do whatever they can to be there. But if they are annoyed or frustrated, they will never let you know. You do need to make it easy for the guests, and I think that means either your hometown or albany. It is your wedding, of course, and you should be happy, but in throwing a wedding you are a host and need to consider how much money guests would need to shell out for rental cars, hotels, maps, etc., not to mention time out from work and the frustrations involved with travelling and finding one’s way around any city so that people can truly enjoy your wedding.

10/19/06 @ 9:35 am (reply)