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Mrs. Lime, Los Angeles Age and Occupation in 06: 25, Design Fiance's Age and Occupation: 25, IT Engagement Date: July 7, 2006 Wedding Date: August 5, 2007 Venue: An historic estate About Me: Between work and wedding planning, I try to squeeze in napping, drawing, random spurts of craftiness, tennis, and eating lots of Sprinkles cupcakes, dark chocolate, and noodles of all kinds. Mr. Lime and I have spent our adult lives growing up together, and we're very excited to finally be getting married!
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Ethical or Not?

October 19th, 2006 @ 10:58 am by Mrs. Lime

I’ve read a number of articles on wedding bargains and how to cut wedding costs. A few say to call venues for quotes, but not to mention the word wedding. Some go so far as to say that you should tell them it’s for a family reunion or some other get together. I don’t know, but whenever I think about doing that, my conscience pokes me…

…but then again, venues aren’t really all that ethical if they would rent the same space for the same amount of time to someone else for half the price, right? (not sure if this second one is a question of ethics).

What do you think?

14 Responses to “Ethical or Not?”

1.
Miss Butterfly says:

My thoughts? Yes, it is ridiculous that people will inflate their prices for a wedding. We are having trouble with limo companies because they are doing exactly that. However, should you lie about it? I dont think so. Why? Because its always good to be on good terms with your vendors. They could really screw things up for you. What would happen if they found out eventually that you were having a wedding? They could inflate your prices anyway….

I would rather tell them that its a wedding and bargain like hell, than to lie and get caught. but that’s just me.

2.
Charlene says:

Hrmm, maybe here’s an idea. If you just call for a QUOTE and say that its for a large and very elaborate family reunion (chaircovers, and 3 tiered cake, anyone?) and then call back a few days later to get a quote for a WEDDING, and compare the 2 (very different) costs. Then maybe contact the venue again and ask WHY they are charging such a high costs for similar services. Maybe they will cut something down for you? who knows… I just know that it would be a BAD idea to actually BOOK the venue under false pretenses!!!

3.
D says:

I wouldn’t book under false pretenses either. Those suggestions have always seemed sketchy to me. What about contracts? Who’s to say they wouldn’t void your contract upon finding out this was going to be a wedding reception instead of a reunion? Not a risk I’d be willing to take.

4.
fizzy says:

I don’t see how it would matter as you wouldn’t be able to *keep* those prices. If you were truly not holding a reunion there, but were holding a wedding, then you’ve changed your portion of the deal. As D said, they could then change the contract based on that.

I’d rather just know up front what the true costs are.

5.
christina says:

This practice really really irks me. A hair salon I was looking at has “special occasion styling” pricing and “bridal stlye” pricing. In that case I was very tempted to say it was a special occasion(who’s to say my wedding isnt special?) and save myself the 100 extra dollars (yes it was 100 more). It was so obvious that they were charging more just because it was a wedding. In the end I chose to take my business elsewhere, which is probably the best way to go about it. If they are charging more because it is a wedding you should ask why and if they dont have valid reasons–more staff, longer hours–find another vendor.

6.
Yukirei says:

The only way I’ve heard this actually being pulled off is on cake, you could say it’s for a family reunion or corporate event, and have someone pick it up. A knottie did this and her cake was ver simple-individual round cakes set on tiered pedestal thing, and decorated with fresh flowers (by her florist, I assume).

7.
Miss Plumeria says:

I like Christina’s take above. I think I’m like you — my conscience would definitely kick me, even if I got away with it… I probably am paying a bit more because the hotel knows my event is a (large!!) wedding, but we’re saving some $ by not choosing one of their wedding “packages” with tons of unneeded services. Also, we negotiated for different things and had a few fees waived because of the amount of people and food.

8.
mrs dragonfly says:

what I did was check the online prices first on the venues since sometime they will give you a different price over the phone. Same thing with hotels. My friend is getting married in December where she wrote down the rate of $129 on her save the date info but when I actually went online, I saw that they had rooms for $99 at the same hotel.

9.
A says:

I do events for my company, so I was able to call some vendors I liked to get corporate rates for luncheons/dinners ect.

I also called as a b2b, asking about reception packages. The way they inflate prices is outrageous! I’d save over $5000k and get MORE as a corporate event! I can’t book my reception as a corporate event with a clear conscience. But you can bet I will bring up the price disparity and bargain like crazy when the time comes!

10.
Shellsbells says:

I would say if you and your FI decided to form an LLC say to flip houses then you could technically call your even the corporate launch event. This however is a stetch but the fee to form an LLC of about $300 or so may actually save you money if you really wanted to do this!

11.
Miss Lime says:

thanks for all your thoughts, ladies!

checking published prices and/or just asking for a quote, then using that as a bargaining tool is a good suggestion.

yeah, not sure how you’d deceive a vendor all the way…especially when you show up in a big, white dress!

12.
ald says:

I think it makes sense to have lower rates for corporate events - they give you a deal, you’re likely to come back for other corporate events. People don’t plan to bring return business form weddings, as they (should?) happen only once.

I imagine the increase in costs is not simply because they can (though surely that’s a chunk of it) but there are also heightened expectations for a wedding — the level of service leading up to and on the day of the event. I also bet they’re a lot more planning aggravation on the venue/vendor’s part when it’s a wedding. They don’t have a TV show called “Family Reunion-zilla” out there for a reason, y’know? They take some grief as well…

That said, I think it’s legit to say it’s an “event” and you’ve got your bases covered. If the contract says “event” it can’t be voided bc it’s not the type of event they’d imagined, unless you’ve specifically gone out of your way to mislead them.

Or, if you want to be totally straightfoward, ask if they have different prices for a regular event and a wedding, and ask why. Then explain why your wedding would still be mre like the generic event - and try to negotiate down the price.

13.
Miss Lime says:

very good points, ald, on the upcharges. that totally makes sense, as i am in a service industry as well, and the repeat customer thing is a biggie.

thanks for that food for thought.

14.
Nony Mouse says:

I’ve asked about “Event” pricing. And after I get my quote, and they ask about the type of event, I tell them Wedding. To the bakers, I ask about how much this size cake, plain white icing costs (I’m just doing a few sugar decorations, which can be ordered on-line).


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Mrs. Lime Mrs. Lime, Los Angeles Age and Occupation in 06: 25, Design Fiance's Age and Occupation: 25, IT Engagement Date: July 7, 2006 Wedding Date: August 5, 2007 Venue: An historic estate About Me: Between work and wedding planning, I try to squeeze in napping, drawing, random spurts of craftiness, tennis, and eating lots of Sprinkles cupcakes, dark chocolate, and noodles of all kinds. Mr. Lime and I have spent our adult lives growing up together, and we're very excited to finally be getting married!