Open Question: Outdated Church

Open Question: Outdated Church

November 22nd, 2006 @ 1:37 pm by Open Question
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Hi Weddingbee,

This weekend, my fiance and I went to visit the church where we’re going to be married next summer. He’s a practicing Catholic, and the rules dictate that you must be married inside a church or a chapel. We’ve picked the parish currently run by his childhood priest; since we don’t want to get married in his hometown, this is our only option if we’re going to have a Catholic ceremony. We could get married in a different church, but b/c we’re not parishoners and don’t know those priests personally, it could run us upwards of $1,000. Plus, we love Father Jeff (his childhood priest).

So, what’s the problem? I know this sounds super-bridezilla-ish, but the church decor is just HORRIBLE. The carpet is a 70’s brown, and the altar is brown faux-wood (it looks like a 1960’s record cabinet). It only has stained-glass windows, which should be pretty, except they don’t let in any natural light and the artificial light is awful, too. I’ve been a pretty darn laid-back bride so far, but this place is terrible!

My question is: can you point me toward any resources/ideas for decorating the church itself without spending a gazillion dollars on flowers or accessories? If it helps, we’re having a summertime wedding, and our ceremony will be at 2:00 p.m. I’m freaking out, because I don’t want to have an ugly wedding! Thanks.

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14 Responses to “Open Question: Outdated Church”

Guest

Daisy

Wow it sounds like the church my BF and I go to. I woul really play down my hiding it with a lot of foilage and runner down the isle to at least cover it up some.

11/22/06 @ 1:42 pm (reply)

Guest

junebride07

We have 70’s red carpet and are using a runner and flowers on the end of the pews. Are there windows? Maybe wreaths or something?

11/22/06 @ 1:48 pm (reply)

Guest

Christina

The church I go to isn’t exactly beautiful either.. but the place means a lot to my fiance and his family. I’m going to use an aisle runner and flowers and hopefully the photographer can do the rest!

11/22/06 @ 1:51 pm (reply)

Guest

Tea

maybe you can do a walk through with your photographer and they can suggest ways to pretty up the church…especially in terms of lighting which always is a big part of everything.

11/22/06 @ 2:00 pm (reply)

Guest

first off..i think you may have to double check w/ the church to see how far you can go w/ decorations..some churches have strict rules…
but i would rec. to use tulle and flowers to decorate. in regards to the artificial light - maybe you can use candles or electric candles and hang them between every other pew & at the altar?

11/22/06 @ 2:25 pm (reply)

Guest

wsukarebear

I would suggest candles as allowed (romantic!), pew decs and wreaths. I am not a runner bride but that would probably help. MrsRobsButton and a couple other brides have used garlands/swags to decorate their spaces adn those go a long way.

Although the ceremony is the most important part, I don’t think a lot people will be criticizing a church setting. There are beautiful churches out there, but equally ugly and old school ones, too, so I think guests will “get” that. Rest assured that the focus will be on the two of you!

Have a great guestbook tables, picture collages, etc., up so there’s something for guests to focus on. I have been to a wedding or two where they showed a slide show at the church before the ceremony, which would also be a deterrent.

11/22/06 @ 2:28 pm (reply)

Guest

amy

candles, draping fabrics, and maybe some tall tall plants? but i 2nd the “check wit hthe church” comment…

11/22/06 @ 2:59 pm (reply)

Guest

Darlene

pictures of the actual church would help so we could see what we’re dealing with. But I agree about the candles- candlelight would be beautiful if the lighting at the church is bad. You can get those candle stands to decorate the end of the pews along with tulle and bows/flowers.

11/22/06 @ 3:14 pm (reply)

Guest

han

no place of worship should be described as “terrible.” i’m sure God won’t want you there either so boot out and find another place.

11/22/06 @ 4:17 pm (reply)

10.

Guest

jaycee

if there have been weddings at this church before, maybe ask whoever is in charge what other brides have done?

11/22/06 @ 4:29 pm (reply)

11.

Guest

Miss Blueberry

I think *almost* everyone else’s comments were great, and so helpful. But han needs to shut up (pardon my french). This girl’s concern is very real and logical. If you don’t want to help her out, that’s fine. But you absolutely do *not* need to make her, or any other bride, feel bad in the process.

For the girl (woman) who posed this question, I hope we see a follow-up comment or post from you! Love to hear if you can use candles or whatnot. I hope the church is accomodating

11/23/06 @ 12:39 pm (reply)

12.

Guest

This is a little O/T since it sounds like you plan an indoor wedding, but, I am not sure being married “in the church” means you actually have to be INSIDE a church- it just means the wedding has to be officiated by a priest. Maybe Father Jeff would be willing to work with you on an alternate location…?

11/23/06 @ 11:41 pm (reply)

13.

Guest

Mel

This is only mildly related to this post, and I don’t even know if anyone will even see this so long after the original post, but the comment by Miss. Blueberry has made me so glad I found this site.

I went to the Knot on a friend’s advice. I read several entries over time and saw a consistent pattern on a few Boards of just plain mean, know-it-all responses. So, me being me, I tried to stick up for one bride to be… and I got it! Needless to say I was mortified, b/c the names I was called were so contrary to my personality!

Anyway, I just wanted to say how nice it is to see constructive, intelligent commentary that doesn’t attack others who perhaps didn’t include a detail, or have a different take on things.

As for the church, in addition to the flowers, perhaps donating a lovely white cloth for the alter (like a giant tablecloth). Because you have to watch with colors, maybe detailing of some sort, a cross or something in white/ivory, gold, or silver. Churches use those, it would cover the faux wood alter, and could be used for future weddings held in the church.

11/26/06 @ 6:15 pm (reply)

14.

Guest

Aliya

Hi everyone! Thanks for the nice comments (and for sticking up for me). For the record, I love Fr. Jeff and don’t mind getting married in a church that’s not “mine”…I just don’t like barf-colored carpet

I promise to send an update when we figure out what we’re doing. It seems as though there are a few themes: coverage (aisle runner, altar cloth), dim lighting/candles (I assume this will be OK even in the daytime, then?), and flowers/wreaths (LOVE the idea of using wreaths). A million thank yous!

11/27/06 @ 5:23 pm (reply)