Last night, as I tried to get my insomniac ass to fall asleep, I had an idea. First let me back up a bit. I’m a late sleeper. I like to go to bed late, and I like to wake up late. Mr. Kiwi is the almost exact opposite- he likes to do everything early. What kind of person wakes up at 7:30am on a Saturday?! I mean, sleep IN man! He gets up early, takes the dog out (I suspect the dog would like to sleep in, as well), and plays video games with the sound turned down.
While I do love the way he thinks of me in the early morning (turns all sound down and takes the dog out), I can’t stand how he falls asleep when he’s got the bed to himself. I go to bed after 1am on Friday and Saturday nights. He usually is in bed by 11pm, 12am at the latest. No matter what time he goes to bed, he always wakes up before 9am. So that leaves a good two hours he has the bed to himself at night, and two hours I have in the morning.
Mr. Kiwi is a 300lb man, who is twice as large as I am. He’s got a good 14″ on me, which means he uses the bottom of the bed when I can’t. That’s fine. It’s the two hours he gets at night by himself that kill me. When I’m not there, he migrates into the middle of the bed, leaving me a good foot of space to lay, roll over, and sleep. Although a foot sounds like a lot, it isn’t. His excuse? “I’m bigger and need more room.” My reply? “Then buy us a bigger bed, this is sooo not fair.”
As I tried in vain to tug the covers back onto my foot of bed last night, I wondered: How many couples have this fight over the bed? Who is the bed or blanket hog in your relationship?
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33 Responses to “Bed Wars”
My husband says I am the blanket hog. But I think HE is. Anyway, we eventually solved this problem by using two sets of blankets! He has his blankets and I have mine, and now we no longer struggle to stay warm at night 
Kristina
In winter we have our own blankets. We both twist our blankets so that one person might be left without covers. Its weird because even though we’re not sharing a blanket, we cuddle more as if its taboo to just have our own.
Hehe our problem is the opposite of blanket-hogging! Mr. Bluebell is ALWAYS hot at night, so he shoves all of the comforter over on me, which is nice….for a minute or two. Then I get stifled with like four layers of piled up comforter and then the rest dragging off the bed onto the floor since he can’t have ANY on him. Until the middle of the night when he tries to steal it all. Our covers are always turned 180 degrees and not correlating with the sheets and a pillow on the floor and all sorts of crazy things when we wake up. There is apparently a lot of sleep-struggling but neither of us is entirely sure how it works.
My FI and I aren’t big people, and we have a queen size bed. No problems, right? Wrong. I wake up multiple times in the middle of the night to get his elbow out of my ribs or face, or to push him onto “his side” of the bed. I don’t think he means to take so much space, he’s just used to spreading out.
About the blankets - we started out using one blanket, but I got so fed up with waking up freezing that we have our own.
It’s interesting to see all the people with their own blankets! I also have my own private blanket, but somehow that sucker always ends up on HIS side! And, like Mr. Bluebell, he gets really hot, too, and in some weird way he kicks then OFF the bed at the bottom. Another thing, I love the sheets tucked in, Mr. Kiwi needs them loose. And I used to think we were such compatible sleepers!
mr. bee will prolly say that i am a bed hog, but he is definitely a blanket hog. 
I am a full blown blanket hog. I grab hold and then “cyclone” in my sleep rendering FI completely helpless. So now I have my only blanket for under the sheets. Luckily neither of us is a bed hog, but our dog (a 15lb boston terrier) is an extreme bed hog. She moves from the foot of the bed to my pillow and then takes over. I often find her laying perpendicular to us (in between us) trying to take up as much space as possible.
My FI will roll towards the middle of the bed and slowly push me towards the edge so I usually wake up with half of me hanging over the floor. I’ve suggested getting a king size, but I don’t think our room is big enough….
He’s the bed hog, I’m the blanket hog. I barely move around in my sleep but he dances in his sleep. It’s SO ANNOYING.
my DH is not only a covers-stealer, he doesn’t even use them himself. so while he’s sleeping, he tugs them off of me and then either throws them off of himself on the other side, off of the edge of the bed, or crawls on top of them so that i can’t tug them back from under his big butt. it got so bad that after 4 years of being together, we finally use 2 different blankets. looks pretty ridiculous, but it’s the only way i don’t regularly catch pneumonia. also, i am a very very light sleeper while DH talks, laughs, snores, and violently moves around in his sleep. he also likes to sleep on my pillow, breathing directly into my ear. usually we are both on my side of the bed (me trying to get away from him, smooshed against the wall). i haven’t had a good night’s sleep in a good 2 years.
We both like to snuggle before we fall asleep. If I come over to his side of the bed, I move back over to mine once he starts snoring (grr snoring!). When he falls asleep on my side of the bed he doesn’t move though, he just stays in the middle. So we’ve made a cuddling rule, I come over to his side of the bed to cuddle
I am a blanket hog, and our dog is a bed hog. So FI is cold and on the edge, and I’m warm - but on the edge. The dog has the most space and he’s only 4 lbs!!
FI and I aren’t particularly large people, but we were having the hardest time sharing a queen-sized bed. So I got us a king-sized bed and it was the best money I’ve ever spent!
My FI has a good 5 inches on me and lo and behold, i’m the hog of everything, haha. We don’t live together but it’s funny when I’m in his bed, I end up in the middle of the bed hogging up everything but when we’re in my bed in NY, I stay on my side but still hog the blanket….kind of weird. We did both agree on getting a king size bed though after marriage
Hahaha… these are funny comments. Miss Bluebell - you cracked me up! Anyway, I am totally the bed hog… I roll towards my SO until I bump into him. When he moves over, I roll more, etc. until he’s about to fall off the bed. Oops! Another issue we have is that he loves sleeping when it’s FREEZING in the room and I can’t get warm enough. No one is really a blanket hog though…
funny you mention it, FI is out of town, and i had the best sleep evah in a long time, last night!
We don’t have much of an issue with blankets or space, it’s the snoring! He doesn’t really snore that bad, but sometimes it does keep me awake. Usually I’ll just nudge him and he’ll shift enough to make it go away. Well, one night, apparently my “nudge” awoke him so suddenly that it startled him, so he got really mad and it turned into this huge argument. Hey, it’s his fault for snoring in the first place.
I tell my FI that his sleeping habits were totally one of his “campaign promises” (things that changed once we moved in together/got engaged). He always moved around a lot, but now he snores!
He’s also a bed hog and a cuddler, which I can’t stand - he’s huge! So he’ll fall asleep “cuddling me” and more and more of his weight will be piled on me till I can’t breath. So now he cuddles for a little while, I say ENOUGH! and he goes back to his 3/4 of the bed (I know, makes me sound like quite the *itch, right?).
He also steals the covers, but he feels so guilty about this that he’ll generally wake up and notice before I do and tuck me back in. Which is pretty cute. And then he’ll apologize for the rest of the day.
He also pushes in on my pillows. Its a good thing he makes up for his annoying sleeping habits in other ways.
I don’t spend the night with my FI very often, but when I do, we have some space and cover issues. He has a small full sized bed. We are about the same height, but I always end up with a foot of bed for myself to turn around in and try to get comfortable. He also hates to be hot, so he keeps his room thermostat freezing, which prompts me to pile on the covers.
My FI is 6′4″ so his feet hang off the end of our queen bed most of the time. I like the covers tucked in at the bottom, but he has them untucked so his feet will fit. He also tries to get on my side while he’s asleep, but I kick him in my sleep when he does. Haha.
when we’re together we don’t have those issues. we cuddle and generally sleep spooning each other the whole night. i might eventually wriggle out while i’m sleeping but that’s it. our problem is that he sleeps too late and i’m up with the light. not cool when he’s got the keys to the car and i don’t know my way around. my poor tummy. lol. that’s when i just wake him up so he can feed me. ahh, true love!
We’re both both. I’m usually the cover hog, and he tends to hog the bed. I have a few sleep issues (like I can’t sleep facing him, b/c I get claustrophobic and can’t breath, and I also like to be in a cocoon of covers ), but I just move around to deal. He also gets very hot very quickly, but that just leaves more covers for me.
Also, he falls asleep as soon as his head hits the pillow and then snores! I’m a bed time thinker, and it drives me bananas. Especially when I can’t sleep and he’s snoring away.
The “to each his/her own (Covers)” comments made me laugh b/c we just bought a comforter big enough for our bed after having our own covers for the longest time.
On top of all of that, we have 2 kitties that sleep with us, and I’m too whipped to move them if I need to move and they are in my way. I’ve actually slept at the foot of the bed b/c the kittens fell asleep by my pillows!
This is a very interesting topic!
miss bluebell I feel your pain….my FI likes to sleep with the fan on during winter with the windows ….i then freeze. my FI is also a big man 6′5″ a whole foot taller than me…a total bed hog, we have a queen but he likes his feet on the bed so he will sometimes sleep diagonally across the bed leaving me with a corner of the bed 2 sleep on.
correction…
with the windows wide open
I feel so lucky not to have this problem! Neither of us is a tosser or turner, so we can usually share as small as a double, either side by side or spooning. Our problem is that our heads always seem to end up on the same pillow. He claims I steal his in my sleep… I say he probably stole it, first 
THE DOG (42 lbs of love and crazy). She actually like covers and pillows…the whole shabang! I hate being cold…fi hates being warm so it pretty much works
We’re both big people, so we have a king size bed. Totally worth the money, I recommend it to anyone. We don’t fight much over covers or anything, either. Our problem is the snoring. Mine, not his. Because of a pain condition, I often have to sleep on my back, and then I snore like a “frieght train” (his words.) I feel really bad about it, but he’s often afraid to shove me over in my sleep because of the pain condition, so he gently wakes me up and tells me to roll over. I’d rather just be rolled, but, hey, this works too.
We’re both bed hogs, and I’m a blanket hog!
My SO has to have the fan on every night, which gets REALLY annoying and cold, but I’m the bed hog. Occasionally he’ll wake up to find he’s on the very edge of the bed because I’m laying diagonally, taking up as much space as possible. I’m about 2/3s his size and weight.
He also wakes up about two hours before I do, so he loves to tell me when I snore and do funny things. I deny it all
i’m in a long distance relationship and my guy was just here visiting. i only have a twin bed in my apartment so when he is here i end up pulling the trundle bed out. after he falls asleep i go to sleep on the trundle bed or else i’m up allll night. i made him promise that when we live together we’ll get a huuuge bed.
My boyfriend and I both live with our parents, and we both have twin beds. He likes to cuddle and I don’t (at least not while I’m sleeping!) so we have some interesting nights when we spend them together. He also snores, which to me is the most annoying sound in the world at 3am. But we get by. He likes to steal the covers from me and twist them up so I wake up freezing in the night and yell at him!
I must be intolerable in bed. I’m the blanket hog, bed hog, and I snore…which means of course I fall asleep first. My man sure is the one for me if he can put up with all of that!
Mrs. Kiwi, Los Angeles
Age and Occupation in 06: 27, Bookkeeper
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 27, P.E. Teach/Coach @ private schools in LA
Engagement Date: March 31, 2006
Wedding Date: November 3, 2007
Venue: Radisson Hotel
About Me: I'm a bookkeeper who failed high school algebra. I'm currently living in Los Angeles, literally a street over from where I grew up with Mr. Kiwi, my honey of three years. We have a jumbo mini-dachshund (seriously, he's huuuuge), and we're planning an autumn themed wedding on a shoestring, paid for by ourselves. The wedding date is my late grandma's birthday, I needed her there somehow, and that seemed like the best way for us. I can't believe I'm a Bee! I couldn't be more proud!
My FI is a large man, as well, and we have a queen sized bed. He is the bed hog, for the same reason your FI gave, “because I’m bigger.” But I am the blanket hog, so I guess that helps even things out a bit.