Reader Buzz: The 5 Love Languages
February 1st, 2007 @ 5:31 pm by Reader Buzz
Mrs. Bee here.
When Miss Poppy first blogged about Gary Chapman’s book, The 5 Love Languages, I was intrigued and purchased a copy. I haven’t had a chance to read it yet, but just going through the general overview online was fascinating. The author talks about the importance of expressing love in a “language” that your spouse understands. There are five primary love languages, and while all of them are important, you need to speak and understand your spouse’s specific love language in order for them to feel loved.
The languages are as follows:
Word of Affirmation - Verbal appreciation, compliments, encouragement, support.
Quality Time - Spending focused, quality time having conversations, doing activities together.
Receiving Gifts - Visual symbols of love where gifts are seen as an expression of love and devotion.
Acts of Service - Chores done out of love, not obligation.
Physical Touch - Physical contact (sexual, hugs, kisses, etc.).
You can read more in-depth descriptions of the five love languages here. These are also applicable for other relationships in your life as well.
I’ve talked about this with Mr. Bee, and he asked me what my love language was. I said all of them hahaha. But if I had to choose one, I would say acts of service. Growing up in a household and culture that was not that verbally or physically affectionate, acts of service were the way my family showed me love. And so, that’s what I’ve come to appreciate most as well.
For Mr. Bee, it’s hard to say between words of affirmation, quality time, and physical touch. (He’s away from his aim right now so I’ll ask when he gets back. ;))
What is your primary love language? What is your partner’s primary love language? Are you speaking each other’s love languages?
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17 Responses to “Reader Buzz: The 5 Love Languages”
I agree, I’m almost certain his is Words of Affirmation and I’m a split down the middle Quality Time and Physical Touch.
We just finished reading the book together, definitely a worthwhile read!
i’m a words of affirmation along with a mix of quality time and physical touch. i haven’t ask my bf what his is but i think he’s a words of affirmation/quality time/acts of service. i should ask him.
words of affirmation, quality time, phystical touch, and i like give gifts to show my love and devotion (tho receiving them aint bad either! hahaha).
I posted this when Miss Poppy first blogged about the book, but I’ll say it again. This book saved our relationship a few years ago, and I think every couple should read it. My primary love languages are quality time and words of affirmation. My FI’s primary love languages are physical touch and acts of service. While we are not innately inclined to speak each other’s primary love languages, we have worked together to learn how and are doing wonderfully today because of it!
http://www.fpgwebs.com/fivelovelang_profile.asp
A long love language quiz
http://www.fivelovelanguages.com/30sec.html
A short love language quiz
My DH and I read this book together and thought it was great. It was fun to try and guess each other’s love language.
Mine: Quality Time
Him: Acts of Service
One of the best books I’ve ever read. I can use it to apply to just about every relationship with friends, family and SO. I’m definitely physical touch and acts of service, SO is physical touch as well and words of affirmation.
i love this book!
mine is quality (mrs. bee- i too first said all of them! hahaha)
his is physical touch
I think ours are both quality time, and physical touch…well, our main ones.
Mine: Words of Affirmation and Quality Time
His: Physical Touch
fiance just got me a book to read. he read it first..i’ve only gone thru the first chapter, but it’s an interesting read…”emotional infidelity, how to affair-proof your marriage and 10 other secrets to a great relationship” by m.gary neuman
We learned about that book at our engaged couples seminar with the Catholic church. Some of that stuff is pretty dead-on, surprisingly enough.
my FI and I are going to read it together. Another engaged couple told us about it. They kept laughing while we were eating dinner because they said I was “words of affirmation” and my FI was “acts of service”. We were cookie cutter examples. we had no clue what they were talkign about, but we will soon!
Such an amazing book! I also recommend The 5 Languages of Apology- also by Gary Chapman.
[...] these special times, I like to lie down and hold Mrs. Bee - after all, physical touch is one of my love languages. But Mrs. Bee insists on sitting up, so that she can look at me while we are [...]
Awesome book!! 
And I agree anything written by Gary Chapman is a must read!! “Great Post”
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I read this book ages ago but I think it still holds true… Although I’m starting to think that all men need words of affirmation. It’s just a man thing… They need to hear that they’re doing a good job, and they need to know that we trust their judgement. My husband is definitely not excluded. He also likes gifts and physical touch.
I’m quality time and physical touch.
Sometimes it’s easy to know what your significant other’s language is… because that’s the one they naturally use to show love to you.