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We are both Catholic (one of his relatives is actually a priest and wants to marry us). However, to save money, I wanted to have an outdoor ceremony at our reception location and it’s always been a dream for an outdoors ceremony. I know it is pretty strict that if both parties are Catholic, they have to get married in a Church. But is there any way to get around the whole Church thing? (We aren’t strict Catholics - we go to Church maybe once a month). Like if we had a civil service prior and then an actual ¢¢â€š¬…”ceremony¢¢â€š¬? outside, would that work? I’m just not sure how we’d get around his uncle being a priest.
dos
my fiance and i have the same problem.. we are having an officiant who used to be ordained by the Catholic Church and then got permission in the 70s to get married.. he will go through the ceremony as if it is Catholic, however, since it doesn’t meet the Church’s strict guidelines, it will not be a marriage recongized by the Church. you can always get married in the Catholic Church later on if it means that much to have the marriage recognized. ask your venue if they have a list of officiants who can do that.
You can either get married in the church beforehand… and your outdoor ceremony will be a renewal (and not done by the church)… or you can have a non-Roman Catholic ceremony outdoors and have the church confirm your vows at a seperate ceremony afterwards.
Usually the only exceptions that bishops will make to allow you to have a sacrament “outside” the church are in amazing circumstances, i.e. you’re bedridden or something like that.
I am in the exact same situation (his uncle is a priest) and at first he agreed to marry us outside, but then said it would really put his job in jeopardy if he flaunted the rules. We had to respect that, so we are doing the church wedding instead. You just really need to talk to his uncle and see what he is comfortable with. If you get permission, you may be able to go to the church 6 months to a year later for “convalidation” where you essentially get married in the eyes of the church.
I think you just need decide which of the two is your priority - getting married outside or by the uncle in the church. Either way, it’ll be gorgeous and there are great options above for getting convalated (is that a word?) later if being outdoors is that important to you both. Either option is good, just have a serious heart-to-heart with each other about where your priorities lie.
Have you talked to his uncle? Sometimes its ok depending on the archdiocese that the officiant is in, or just the officiant in general.
PS. Ask his uncle if you have a service instead of a mass if it would make a difference in whether or not the ceremony be outside. That may help as well. If you’re planning on a mass- indoors is a must. If just a service- outdoors may be more of a possibility
Lots of girls run into this with Destination weddings too. They either go before and do the catholic ceremony or sometime they can have their marriage ‘blessed’ once they return home, so that might be an option worth exploring.
I’m Catholic and have been to many outdoor weddings with Catholic priests presiding as the officiant. I grew up knowing the priests at my church very well and once asked them how they viewed holding the sacrament of matrimony outside of the church. All of them, in some form, believed that it doesn’t matter WHERE a couple gets married as long as they love each other, the sacrament of the Mass and Holy Eucharist are included, and the couple are married by a Catholic priest. I remember one priest telling me that any place used for a holy purpose is a sacred house of God where the two can marry under his grace 
Hope that helps!
I had the same problem! I wanted a Catholic ceremony, but I’ve always wanted to be married on the beach. I did a TON of research, and I discovered that it’s nearly impossible to get have an outdoor wedding recognized by the Catholic church. However, the church requires that you be married in a “sacred place”. In Europe, there are apprently sacred places that are outdoors. And as it turns out, there are also priests in Hawaii that recognize their land as holy!
So, we are getting married by a Catholic priest and having a Catholic ceremony (not a mass) on the beach!!! We are going through pre-marriage counseling through our local parish, and then they sign a a dispensation form that authorizes a priest in the diocese of honolulu to marry us =)
http://hesaidshesaid.better-together.us/index.php?date=2006-12-04
I’m so excited!
So much trouble. Who makes up the rules here, I wonder? The Pope? Very odd idea, I think. Oh well. Good luck!
I think it depends on the bishop and the dioscese. The marriage has to be performed by a Catholic priest in order to be recognized by the Church, but that doesn’t mean it has to be done inside, and it also doesn’t have to include a Mass. You can get a dispensation from the bishop to have an outdoor wedding and be married by a priest. But if they won’t let you do that, you can always have your own ceremony, and then get your marriage blessed by a priest later, or have a small Catholic ceremony with just yourselves and a couple witnesses…
we had the same problem. the catholic church is pretty inflexible about getting married outside the church. our priest gave us the option of having a small church ceremony the day before with the witnesses and then having a “renewal of vows” ceremony outdoors. that idea to us was a bit strange because no one would be witnessing our actual marriage. but i really do think that it depends on the church and the priest… some are more flexible than others.
good luck!
forgot to mention that we decided to do the church ceremony. it was more hassle than i was willing to deal with.
this is to Olive. I am getting married in a rented church in Tiburon. My family is Catholic and want ceremony w/ Catholic mass. How do I get the information for that Officient who was ordained by Catholic church? thank you.
melanie
we were told that we couldn’t get married by the catholic church at an outside ceremony. Does anyone know a catholic priest in PA that will do this for us?
Hello All,
I was raised catholic and like many of you I would love an outdoor catholic wedding ceremony. Can someone assist me with tips on how to secure a priest in the New York Area that will perform an outdoor ceremony. I am having my reception at a mansion in long island but the land the mansion is on is owned by St. John’s University. The caterer at the mansion told me that St. John’s will not allow an outdoor ceremony which is crazy to because what if I wasn’t catholic. The mansion is available to be rented by anyone. I am reaching out st. john’s for approval to have an outdoor ceremony. Please HELP. Anyone, please forward me advice. Thanks
I have heard from people and other posts that this can be done, but I believe you have to be a member of that catholic church and have them somehow many an exception for you… or I’ve heard the Deacon of the church could possibly do an outdoor wedding. I personally am in Los Angeles and I am looking into this Clergy Referral Service, where a retired priest can marry us. I think this will be a happy middle ground for my situation! =)
@flip flop girl: @flip flop girl: @flip flop girl: @flip flop girl: @flip flop girl: @flip flop girl: @flip flop girl:
I am very interested in this as I would like to have a destination wedding (Hawaii was actually a consideration)Was this a huge hassle, how did you begin to go about this process?
hey guys, put me on the me too list with catholic outdoors wedding speedbump. i do have a simple solution though. this sunday, i was turned down by my priest in front of church. this past week was pentecost where the holy spirit gave special powers and allowances to perform ministries and service to the apostles. stay with me now… i am catholic and love our lord as much as most of you do but im not a bible thumper…but there is something that gave me hope for this outdoor wedding for catholics. this past sundays second reading was all i needed to make me happy.
1corinthians 12:5-6 check it out. you might be suprised. and this was in church the same day i got dissed by my priest!!!! looks like im going somewhere else…
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