Wedding Blog

Growing up, I didn’t have any marriages to really look up to. My parents didn’t marry, and my grandpa died when I was younger leaving my grandma as my last remaining grandparent. So I never really saw what their marriage was like. Sometimes I get envious when I see brides dedicating something to their grandparents -couples who have been happily together for a long time.

It wasn’t until after my grandma died that I learned their marriage wasn’t a rosy one, either. This information was given to me by a family member, without them asking if I wanted to know. It was all said so bitterly - that my grandma was weak for not leaving my drinking grandpa. But back then, things were covered up and marriages weren’t something to get out of easily- they were in it for the long haul.

While my love for my grandparents is unchanged (they weren’t ever anything but loving with the six of us grandchildren), my views of marriage are definitely changed. I wish I had a deep, loving marriage with a sound foundation to aspire to; instead I’ve been surrounded by broken marriages, love gone wrong, and disappointing stories.

This is why I’m aspiring to make my own marriage work. If I can’t find a decent relationship to take cues from, I’ll make my own. I do know marriage is hard work, with give and take daily. My marriage aspiration is to be that couple I searched for in my family. Like all brides to be, I want this to be forever- and I plan on having something my grandchildren can look up to.

Yesterday, my relationship with Mr. Kiwi was complimented. Someone was asking him about the wedding, and noticing the look on his face said, “I know there is something special between you two, I can just see it.” And when Mr. Kiwi agreed, she said, “I can tell you’re each other’s best friend, and that’s hard to find.”

So, hopefully we’re off to a good start. Even though I know the road rarely gets smoother from the beginning on, we’re taking this ride together. In my mind, I’m trying to create a marriage like Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Bacall, one of the most famous Hollywood love stories. In fact, Bacall wrote in her autobiography By Myself, “No one has ever written a romance better than we lived it.” And that is exactly what I want for us.

Are there any book, movie, or television couples you’d liken yourselves to? Or are there any you wish you could be like? I think in real life Mr. Kiwi and I are more like Dan and Roseanne Connor on Roseanne!