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Wow, I didn’t expect all that controversy to my Shhh! post. Thanks for all of your very different opinions! I’d like to think I’m above defending myself, but I’m not. Because I’m human and like most of the world, I enjoyed being loved more than I like being given the cold shoulder. So, please hear me out:
First off, Miss Mouse suggested that I tell my coworkers about my engagement right before the wedding, which is something I never considered (because I’m dense that way). Since we’re not very close to begin with, I really don’t believe that they’ll be upset at being the last to know. They’re very, very respective of my very, very private life, and so we live and work quite well together. Thanks Miss Mouse for the idea! I’m sure it will work out better than coming back and announcing that I’m married (”What? We didn’t even know that you had a boyfriend!… Are you PREGNANT?!”… Um, yeah, that’s the only reason anyone would want to marry me…)
Secondly, Mr. Broccoli loves Miss Broccoli. Miss Broccoli loves Mr. Broccoli. It really works out very well. He is in no way disappointed by my not wearing the e-ring. How come? Well, Mr. Broccoli knew how I felt about wearing an e-ring before he even bought the stone. But he’s somewhat of a traditional guy, and felt that he still needed to get one. If my not wearing the ring were a problem for him, believe me, I would wear the thing. I just feel bad that he still went through all that trouble.
But, like Chrissie mentioned, being engaged is about more than just a ring (who woulda thunk it!). Plenty of husbands don’t wear their wedding bands (my father falls into this category), yet no one suspects them of not loving their wives.
I think walking down the aisle clutching a bunch of flowers sounds ridiculous (Think about it. You. Walking down an aisle. With flowers. It’s just so random. Yet here I am, about to do the very same thing!) I don’t wear my ring. I like to keep the personal… well, personal (I know, I know, I’m writing this for the entire world to see– but it’s different. I feel a whole lot more free on here than I do sometimes in “real” life!) Do these things make me weird? Maybe. Strange? You bet (I like to call myself “unique”– it puts such a rosy glow on things). And maybe I do need therapy… but that’s something Mr. Broccoli has been suggesting for years!
So, all of that to say, I do appreciate your comments. And don’t you think the monkey is cute? I do 
I think there’s nothing wrong with standing up for your own beliefs.
It isn’t a monkey, it’s a chimpanzee!
Otherwise, I agree with everything you said!
I personally didn’t mean to offend you. I think whatever you do with your ring, your wedding, your life, etc is totally your decision. I only meant to say that I was curious about your fiance’s feelings about you not wearing a ring, especially because he was traditional enough to buy one for you. But mainly I asked because my fiance is very adamant about me wearing my ring, if not fanatical. Lol.
Oi! No wonder I am not a zoologist!
Thanks Lanamia… I think Mr. Broccoli will be fanatical about the wedding ring!
personally, i’m not a big fan of the chimp, haha, but kudos to you miss b. everyone marches to their own drum and it’s just not kind when a person insults someone else’s beat when their own has it’s own musical issues. nobody is perfect and everyone is different.
i’m not much of a bracelet person, so it’s a good thing for me that guys don’t give out engagement bracelets, so i completely understand the ring issue. if ur more of a fan of necklaces, maybe you could string ur e-ring on a simple chain…?
I think it’s your own choice to make always. You should always do what makes you feel most comfortable with. That’s the way I am. I’ve been engaged for over a year now, I still tell everybody he’s a “boyfriend” instead of “fiance.” Personally I hate all the personal questions people tend to ask. “How did he propose? When’s the big day? Yadayada…” I thought I was missing the gene that makes all b2b’s soo ready to spill every detail of her engagement to any willing ear. But I finally realized that there are details of my own relationship I really like to keep personal, between him and I, between us and our families and us and our closest friends.
So if you don’t feel you want to disclose this to your co-workers, you definitely don’t have to. But it will become a sensitive topic at work when you return back from your honeymoon! But you’ve kept mum soo long, I’m sure you’ll find the perfect way to take care of this! Good luck!
i second eve. i had such a hard time with the deluge of personal questions and if i had known how nosy my coworkers were going to be, i would have kept my engagement a secret as well.
i enjoyed this discussion. kudos.
hi miss b.
i think the chimp is cute too!
i was really shocked to hear some of the negative comments on your previous post. I also do not wear my ring. .While I did tell my coworkers I was engaged..it took me about two months to finally tell them.
I love, love, love my ring but it just gets in the way..LOL….my FI doesn’t mind or care if I wear the ring either. He knows that I love him..and I know that he loves me….and that’s what really matters to me…the ring to me is just a symbol….but I don’t need to wear the ring to prove that he is committed to me or I am committed to him..just like you, it’s a very personal thing for me..I don’t care what other people think of me.
I’m so glad to hear that there are other brides out there that are as ‘weird’ as me. I can’t wait to read more of your posts. Wish you the best with everything!
Hi Miss B,
While I am glad that you liked the idea, I really can’t take credit - I was just picking up on what starjas had said in her post. Good for you for defending yourself and I too am looking forward to reading your unique posts!
i have to say, after reading both these posts, i still don’t get it. i respect the fact that all of us have different ways of life and priorities.
but i really do not get it. (not the wearing or not wearing a ring part, but the not telling anyone at work part).
Ms. Broccoli, maybe if you could explain what kind of “drama” would result from sharing kind-of basic, and really not that private news, with your co-workers, readers could better understand your motivation. (i don’t intend this as a criticism, just really trying to get my head around it).
…?
I truly don’t believe you.
Why post on a wedding board and say you aren’t that into the wedding thing but be so private about your relationship, engagement and marriage.
sorry. not buying it at all.
Wow, Sara, what do you have against her decision for all this?? It doesn’t affect you in any way so I don’t see why it should bother you this much..
Props to you Miss Broccoli, for wanting to keep your personal life personal. I love the fact that you seem to be very nontraditional. And I like the chimp
Ok, I have to agree. If you want to keep your personal life… well, personal - don’t write on a wedding blog!
“I think walking down the aisle clutching a bunch of flowers sounds ridiculous ”
I’m w. you there! I always said I was “never the marrying kind” and now that the day is coming closer…I’m really just looking forward to our new life rather then the wedding hehe 
Don’t let the drama get you down~As long as you share with US the details of your wedding, who cares if you don’t share it w. “real life” people?
I haven’t really seen this bitchiness (from that original post and some here on this one) before on weddingbee, and it’s sad, and those of you posting in that way come off as very immature and close minded. I think more highly of the majority here and am disappointed in those of you who chose to be unnecessarily defensive (because when you feel the need to be bitchy it is about feeling like you need to defend how “right” you are) and judgmental.
I applaud you Miss Broccoli for being yourself. Some people aren’t gaga over weddings. I never was either, until I got engaged. I can understand wanting to keep your personal life personal, and since you aren’t close with your co-workers, I don’t think not sharing your engagement news/wedding plans with them is a big deal. Because believe it or not, other people just aren’t into weddings as much as we like to think they are. So major props to you for being unique!
i’m really appalled by some of the readers’ negativity as well. miss broccoli (and ONLY miss broccoli) is in the best position to judge whether or not to tell her coworkers about HER wedding. it could be that she just doesn’t get along with them, or that she doesn’t want too much attention…we don’t know. i’m sure she has her reasons. so by scolding her or by telling her that she needs therapy is just being judgmental and rude. you may disagree with what she’s doing, but why be mean about it? i’m sure there is a much more respectful way of expressing your thoughts.
i support your decisions, miss broccoli!
i saw follow only the traditions you want to. it just makes your wedding more personalized don’t you think?
Our dept. is a rumor mill, and hurtful things said about me have come back to me before. So the way I approach it now is that my personal life is none of their business. Every office has a different dynamic, and we don’t know enough about Miss Broccoli’s to judge.
I am not that into weddings either. Not everyone has been planning their wedding since age 5. I certainly haven’t, and I can’t wait til it’s over and we’re married. That doesn’t give me any less right to post on weddingbee, as some have suggested.
Yay, Miss Broccoli! I meant to say it before, but welcome aboard. I am glad to see a less than traditional weddingbee blogger.
Miss Broccoli, thank you for your great posts! I feel the same way that I would never want to invite my co-workers or bosses to my wedding. I believe in keeping my personal and professional lives separate.
Keeping your engagement under wraps was a good idea. I did the opposite by telling everyone at work that I’m getting married. However, I’m not sure how to tactfully let them know they are not invited. It has created an awkward situation.
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Miss Broccoli, Maine Age and Occupation: 20-something, Cookie Monster Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Real Estate, soon to be student (again) Engagement Date: November 2005 Wedding Date: April 2007 Venue: Southern Maine About Me: I actually don't really love weddings (!) and I don't really like broccoli. Fortunately, I have learned that both are not so bad if you squint your eyes and hold your breath. When I'm not planning our 180-ish (90% family!) person wedding, I like to poke fun at Mr. Broccoli, read big books, and drink endless cups of tea.
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