Weddingbee Blog

As requested by reader Kris, I’m going to post some of the readings we have chosen so far. Although I know quite a few of you aren’t religious, I’m hoping we can really just see something lovely in these words, and not be cruel or judgemental. As I have said many times before, I am also not very religious, which is why I’m taking the readings so seriously. I’m going to run down the list of them, where they are from, and all that. The readings were chosen from the booklet “Together for Life”, something the Father gave us to choose from. I’m not quite sure if I may choose from another source, but this is what I have so far.

For our opening prayer, we have chosen:

Father,
hear our prayers for Kiwi and Mr. Kiwi
who today are united in marriage
before your altar.
Give them your blessing,
and strengthen their love for each other.
We ask you this through our Lord…

I chose this one out of four choices we were given. It seemed more about us being together, than about anything else.

Next is the Old Testament Reading:
Stern as death is love.
Song of Songs 2:8-10,14,16a; 8:6-7a

Hark! my lover- here he comes
springing across the mountains,
leaping across the hills.
My lover is like a gazelle
or a young stag.
Here he stands behind our wall,
gazing through the windows,
peering through the lattices.
My lover speaks; he says to me,
“Arise, my beloved, my dove, my beautiful one, and come!”

“O my dove in the clefts of the rock,
in the secret recesses of the cliff,
Let me see you,
let me hear your voice,
For your voice is sweet,
and you are lovely.

“My lover belongs to me and I to him.
He says to me: “Set me as a seal on your heart,
as a seal on your arm;
For stern as death is love,
relentless as the nether-world is devotion;
its flames are a blazing fire.
Deep waters cannot quench love,
nor floods sweep it away.”

Of all the many choices, this is one of the few that again, was about love. There were quite a few about creating woman for man, and being a virtuous wife. Although I am enjoying learning all that I can about the church right now, I’m just not comfortable choosing something along those lines. I don’t know about having a family member reading “lover” in a church, though.

Next, is the responsorial Psalm.
The Lord is Compassionate
Psalm 145:8-9, 10 and 15, 17-18

The Lord is compassionate toward all his works.
(repeat first sentence)
The Lord is gracious and merciful,
slow to anger and of great kindness.
The Lord is good to all
and compassionate toward all his works.
(Repeat first sentence)

Let all your works give you thanks, O Lord,
and let your faithful ones bless you.
The eyes of all look hopefully to you
and you give them their food in the season.
(Repeat first sentence)

The Lord is just in all his ways
and holy in all his works.
The Lord is near to all who call upon him,
and all who call upon him in truth.
(Repeat first sentence)

Now, for some reason, I had a hard time choosing a Psalm from the group I was given. The one we did choose was the easiest one to agree with.

The New Testament Reading

If I do not have love, I gain nothing.
1 Corinthians 12:31-13:8a

A reading from the first letter of Saint Paul to the Corinthians

Brothers and sisters:
Strive eagerly for the greatest spiritual gifts.

But I shall show you a still more excellent way.

If I speak in human and angelic tongues
but do not have love,
I am a resounding gong or clashing cymbal.
And if I have the gift of prophecy
and comprehend all mysteries and all knowledge;
if I have all faith so as to move mountains,
but do not have much love, I am nothing.
If I give away everything I own,
and if I hand over my body so that I may boast
but do not have love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind
It is not jealous, is not pompous,
it is not inflated, it is not rude,
it does not seek it’s own interests,
it is not quick tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice
over wrongdoing
but rejoices with the truth.
It bears all things, believes all things,
hopes all thing, endures all things.
Love never fails.

This was chosen because the words are magnificent, and so beautiful. It doesn’t read as a religious excerpt to me, just as a lovely piece of poetry

Alleluia Verse.
1 John 4:12

If we love one another,
God remains in us
and his love is brought to perfection in us.

This is as far as I’ve gotten. I’ve yet to learn which parts of the ceremony I can omit, and which parts I must have. The choice about who to read for us is also complicated, but I’m sure we’ll find someone who can do it. Every night I look over the choices, and try to find the right one that speaks of Mr. Kiwi and I. I honestly never thought it would be this hard.

The one choice that I’m having a hard time making is the one with the vows. We are given two options:

“I, Kiwi, take you, Mr. Kiwi to be my husband, I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life.”

Or: “I, Kiwi, take you, Mr. Kiwi, for my lawful husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.”

This one leaves me stumped - they both are so beautiful and honest. While I’ve always wanted to say “Til death do us part”, I love the part with “I will love and honor you…”Another part I’m stuck on - reciting the vows as they are said to us, or just saying “I Do”. Come on, what bride doesn’t want to say “I do”?

So this is what we have for the time being. The ceremony may be the hardest thing to plan, and I feel more and more overwhelmed. Any advice, help or just some friendly words of wisdom could be helpful. I appreciate all of you reading this with an open mind!

Did you say “I do” or did you repeat the vows?