Wedding Blog
Part II of my two part series on the upcoming introduction of my & Mr. Bluebell’s parents!
As I mentioned before, one reason that Mr. Bluebell and I haven’t introduced our parents in the past many years is our concern that it will be awkward due to the language barrier. My parents speak only English, and Mr. Bluebell’s speak mainly Chinese with limited English. They are able to communicate pretty well in English, but they’re not comfortable with long conversations and he worries that they’ll have a hard time carrying on during dinner after all the requisite small talk is over with.
Mr. Bluebell will be our only Cantonese-English translator for the evening (although maybe his little brother can help out a bit too.) BUT, much to everyone’s mutual amusement, my brother happens to be essentially fluent in Mandarin! Mr. Bluebell grew up speaking Cantonese exclusively in the home, but his parents are also fluent in Mandarin, so my brother will be able to talk to them in Mandarin - even though Mr. Bluebell won’t understand that conversation! So hopefully the amusement value of that interaction will keep things from getting too awkward. 
Mr. Bluebell’s dad is also performing in a concert earlier in the day that we’re all going to, so there will be lots of “Your concert was wonderful!” etc. to say too!
Several people in their replies to my earlier post have also suggested bringing pictures to try and spark conversation, which I think is a great idea! Hopefully my parents will be able to dig some up, since they recently moved (sort of - they’re still in the process of building their future house, so they are in a temporary place now) so 90% of their belongings are in storage boxes in about 5 states between the old house and future house.
That said - how many of you have a language barrier between your & your fiance’s parents? How do you deal with it? Anyone have any more recommendations for us?
And just for fun… one more poll! 
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Well, my parents speak the same language- YELLING. 
But although Mr. K’s side is hispanic, no one speaks it- maybe a few people. Sorry!
You’re lucky that they can get off a bit on their own! My parents speak NO Spanish and FI’s parents speak NO English and our wedding will be the first time they have met (and we’ve been together for 10 years!) So clearly this one hits home for me and I look forward to other’s responses and recommendations. =)
How do you get them to stop having side conversations in another language not everyone understands, ugh! Perhaps this is a “manners” question only.
We have this problem as well. Mine speak English/Taiwanese/Mandarin, and Mr.E’s speak Cantonese and VERY minimal English. *blah* Dont think we’ll be spending too many holidays as one big happy family… =/
I feel you Miss Bluebell! Mine speak Taiwanese/Mandarin and minimal English, his parents speak Cantonese/English/Spanish. They met before we were offically engaged and about a year later, it’s still awkward!! They keep the conversation flowing (more like not-stalling) by talking about when we’re going to have children. =/
Our parents have not yet met, (although his Dad keeps asking when they’ll get to meet my parents!) My parents only speak English and his parents speak Taiwanese/Mandarin/Pretty Good English. I had a hard time at first when I met them, but in person is easier than over the phone. That’s for sure.
I’m anticipating my parents having to ask things twice or look to Andie for clarification. But, hey, it makes for interesting get-togethers!!!
When I first met his parents (only last month), Andie had taught me some key Taiwanese phrases. And so I was able to greet his mom who came to pick us up. She was quite surprised! Hmmmmm……maybe we’ll be able to teach my parents some Taiwanese….or not.
His parents speak English (mom is better than dad), Cantonese and the mom speaks Mandarin. My parents speak English (understand better than speak), and Korean. They only met at the wedding and I am perfectly happy with the two sets never seeing each other. I mean, just because their kids got married doesnt necessarily make them friends.
Future MIL is from a small town NE of Dallas. I am from the NW and I don’t know what she is saying about 25% of the time. I also have this terrible fear that I will start talking like her without knowing it and that she will think I am making fun of her.
My parents speak English and Korean, and his parents only speak English. My father is more fluent in English than my mother, but my mom pleasantly surprised me with her English when I heard her talking to FMIL. There were moments when things were kinda awkward, but my FI and I made a big effort to move the conversation along. Eventually, everyone felt comfortable and they talked as if they were all friends and I would come in and help out once in a while to translate. Both families are good a reading hand gestures and body language, so that helped too. My FI sometimes can understand my mom’s Korean just by the animation on her face!
I am planning on acting as the translator at our all English-speaking wedding. Let me explain. My mother is from Mississippi and the family has extremely thick “bubba” accents. My father’s family is from northern Minnesota and would make excellent extras in Fargo. Now take into account that my FI’s family are English and have *strong* accents. I’m currently making my parents watch BBC America a lot and I bought the FMILs a book entitled “How to Speak Southern.” At least everyone finds it amusing.
E: Please plant secret recording devices everywhere! This is going to be great.
We added all the siblings to the first meeting and a few aunts and uncles so that the lack of parent-parent communication wouldn’t be so obvious and they could both communicate with at least some people in their native tongues. Conversation was slow at first but it was less unnerving for people than a really small group.
mr. bee’s mom speaks korean (she’s japanese), so my parents loved it. altho they are fluent in english, it was something to bond over so it’s pretty darn cool that your bro speaks mandarin. maybe he can teach you some phrases that you can use. 
as for your baby pics that are hard to find, i think the rents would love to see engagement pics (if you guys took them) or just pics of you two in general. better yet an album so you can go over the pics together and tell them stories associated with the pics.
first meetings are always a bit nervewracking (ours certainly was), but try not to be too nervous, and i’m sure you guys will be fine. 
my husband and i have the same problem too, esp during the time that led to our wedding last year.
both our parents/family are the introvert type, but they all had to be seated together during the wedding and the dinner, we were quite worried of the silent embarassement that is to follow, but it was a good thing that my parents took up a pro-active role and approached my in-laws! and it also helped that the centrepiece at our VIP table is huge and conversations were practically impossible!
My FHs parents only speak English. My parents first language is German (my mom is Austrian, my dad is German). They both speak English but my moms English is considerably better than my dads. Actually, my dads English is much better than he let’s people on to know but he is kind of shy when talking English. I hope that won’t stop them from talking English. My dads girlfriend (my parents seperated 25 years ago) speaks excellent English but is obsessed with native american culture. When my FH met my dad and his gf for the first time she spent hours making him feel guilty about what his family and his country has done to the native-american community. So there should be some interesting discussions with my family and my FH American family.
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Mrs. Bluebell, New York
Age and Occupation in 07: 26, Finance Manager
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 27, Playing with the cat and/or Consulting
Engagement Date: December 25, 2005
Wedding Date: June 2007
Venue: Bride's family summer home in the Adirondacks
About Me: Trying to find the perfect balance between family tradition (marrying at the house everyone else in my family gets married at), making our's modern, interesting and different from everyone else in my family's, and incorporating some Chinese tradition for my Chinese fiance. I really have no idea what it's going to end up looking like!
Also, I picked Miss Bluebell for my name because I have blue eyes and I'm a loser like that.
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