Hi everyone! As we write up our comment policy, one issue has come up a few times: vendor comments.
We’ve noticed there are a few type of vendor comments:
We’d like to allow Helpful Vendors, and we definitely want to ban Wedding Spammers. What about the middle ground though… where should we draw the line?
I used to post lots of comments, but no longer do. (With this exception.)
In my ever so humble opinion, there are vendor blogs for brides, and bride blogs for brides, even vendor to vendor blogs.
Some popular real estate or marketing blogs don’t allow comments, and have 1000’s of faithful readers.
Whenever a vendor posts in a bride’s forum, something seems fishy. I am guilty of doing this, but have reformed.
With that said I will continue to faithfully read this fantastic resource, but refrain from commenting.
I definitely think we should keep helpful vendors, in the same way that Jillian Kay said she is more likely to cut us slack and be understanding because of hearing our opinions and understanding us better, through the vendor comments I am more understanding of their position because I see that they want to help us and not just take our money (a very common misconception between the two very different worlds) I don’t even mind the contributing vendors, if they help somebody out with a comment then I don’t see why they shouldn’t be allowed to help out a bit more with their services. I hate the spammers, but I’m not sure how I feel about the linkers, while I understand the need to get your name out there, I think a site like this should require a bit more discresion and vendors should really only give their link if it is a service the bride is looking for specifically.
I recently emailed Miss Lovebug about this exact topic. I am a jewelry designer, and I have posted several comments in the past few weeks when a bride has requested info on specific topics like “clip-on earrings” or “custom made brooches.” Most of the time it has been in response to beehive questions. However, I have also commented recently on a question regarding fertility, which has nothing to do with my trade.
I really enjoy reading this blog, and will continue to do so regardless of the comment policy, however, I hope that you will gear the comment policy more toward the obnoxious folks who just want free advertising and not to the ones who truly want to help out the brides.
honestly speaking…
i dont know where i stand on this issue..
there have been vendor comments that i’ve found to be annoying at times..although i understand that they need to make a living and what not..and are just trying to promote their business.
and hey, there may be some brides that will appreciate links to their websites, and etc..
however..i do believe there should be some restrictions or suggestions on appropriate “vendor behavior”…
IMO, I don’t like those who fall into the category of “spammer” and “linker” :T
I have no problem with a vendor putting a link to their services in an actual post relating to that service (ie if a Cali bride is looking for a Cali photographer, then said photographer should be able to offer their services, especially given that, like JillianKay, the veteran vendors on here have gotten our input and know if their dynamic would work with ours.)
I do, however, think there should be some type of policy on the sites that vendors’ names link to. Most of us link to our own blogs, or our own Web sites, or something similar. I don’t link to my babysitting services, or to my law firm, or whatever (sadly, I have neither in reality.) Maybe there should be a blanket policy of name links only allowed for noncommercial use. This board isn’t about giving vendors free advertising. I’m assuming the ads we see on here are paid advertising, which help keep the site running, and to just let all those advertisers post free instead would not only withhold necessary funds, but would turn this board from a community of like-minded b2bs (and g2bs!) into a craigslist of sorts.
With that said, if a vendor wants to create a personal Website that displays their work (a videographer’s presentation of his recent vacation, for example) then that’s an entirely different story than free advertising.
Maybe once a month there could be an arena for vendors to provide tips to all of us and also link to their services. After all, if it weren’t for the discussions (albeit heated discussions) of some services/vendors, many of us might not have the info we need to make informed decisions that are in our best interests.
Maybe have the vendors register or something… Just a thought.
I have no problem with helpful or contributing vendors, and frankly, I would be excited to learn that an Ohio vendor even reads this site (it would certainly be a tip-off that they’re someone I might want to work with). And I think even linkers are appropriate when someone is requesting info about vendors in a particular region and the vendor is from that region or an internet service. The only time that vendor comments have annoyed me is when they sound like personal attacks, but that sort of thing will be prevented with the comment policy anyway.
i’m generally ok with most vendor comments to tell you the truth as long as they’re not spammers and are interested in contributing to the weddingbee community.
but someone just emailed me about the another type of vendor - the surreptitious vendor, which is a vendor who poses as a bride. i’ve actually seen this on some messageboards, but haven’t seen it on weddingbee yet myself… has anyone else?
I like what JillianKay had to say. I don’t mind (or even notice!) when a vendor is out there when they are posting helpful info with the rest of the posters, even if it is specific to his/her trade.
I guess I don’t have any problems until something comes up, like The Great Videography Debate of 2007. I thought it was bizarre-o how some jumped immediately on the defense and in what I felt was a hostile way, when we’re just posting friendly banter as a bunch of bride, typically. It was so weird!
However, I think that they could register, like the previous poster said. I don’t think they should be banned completely because most are valuable to our community, I’d say.
I think the best way to do it is either make all vendors register with a description of who they are, what they do, where they’re located, and what their site offers or at least madate if the leave a comment include all of the above.
I don’t think they should be required to register - this isn’t a bridal board, and I would hate for it to become one. I think comments should be monitored for wedding spam and hostile comments, but it should still be free for anyone to comment. I like the openness wedding bee provides. I’m on another bridal message board where the women attack anyone who remotely sounds like a vendor - it’s really over the top.
I would delete spam. But I rememeber one bee did a post on photographers around the U.S. divided up by states that I found useful, so I wouldn’t mind if that became a weekly or monthly or once in a blue moon feature–to have a “call for submissions” and have the readers (including vendors who are readers) suggest some names (for whatever the topic of that week, month, etc. is, be it bakeries or venues or flower sources etc.), then compile it by state.
It wouldn’t be an endorsement/ad, and wouldn’t have to turn into a comprehensive, exhausting directory, but just a resource for those who *are* looking for vendors and a chance for said vendors to show their work. Maybe with a “weddingbee” coupon now and then if applicable.
I’d prefer something like that to seeing vendors making a direct sales pitch in response to a post. I also find it useful to see things from a vendor p.o.v. (I’m not one, btw! : ) in terms of what makes a good one, things to watch out for in contracts, general view etc. There’s a way for people with knowledge/expertise to contribute without turning into a self-promotional thing.
I think #’s 1 and 2 are fine, 3 and 4 should be blocked. This isn’t about promoting your own wares UNLESS it’s specifically pertinent to the conversation.
I think we should allow everyone but spammers, as long as the vendors’ posts are actually in response to a question that relates to their services. You should at least give this effort a try, and then change it later if necessary. So if the boards start to get really cluttered with vendors taking advantage of a relaxed policy, then it should be time to clamp down- but start with a relaxed approach and then just wait and see.
I see no problem with the Helpful and Contributing Vendors, and think that comments from Vendor Linkers should be allowed if they pertain to the post to which they’ve linked.
I don’t think there should be restrictions about vendors using their names to link to their work sites. If a bride was interested enough by that person’s comment (whether or not it was clear the commentor was a vendor), why prevent her from visiting that commentor’s site? And at the same time, brides’ personal sites could also be considered “self-promotional” even though they may not be selling anything.
Me again.
As a vendor, I would not want to put my name/business/link in every post as one member suggested, I feel that would be too blatant of advertising. (And may end up encouraging more vendors to post.)
However, I would also not want to link to a personal site, as I think that may not be in the interest of full disclosure. (I’d feel like I was posing as a bride, which I think would be wrong.)
My business shouldn’t be in-your-face…goodness knows you don’t need any more advertising. But, if I make a comment and you want to know what perspective I’m coming from, it should be easy for you to find out that I am a vendor and not a bride (and therefore you may weigh my opinion differently). Again, whatever the bees decide is great with me!
I’d like to think that I also fall into the helpful vendor category — i’ve been reading weddingbee since before I was a vendor. I started off as a wedding blogger (like mrs bee) just because of my love for weddings and b/c there were so many great things out there that I wanted to share with other people…. But then I did become a wedding planner.
That said, I comment on weddingbee when I feel I have something helpful to contribute (i.e. a great website, an etiquette question that I know the answer to) and I would frankly contribute even without the link back to my planning or blog sites — I just like to share information and be helpful.
I live in SF where there aren’t many Bees (though I’m sure there are readers), I don’t think my posts should be considered to self-gratifying since most of you ladies are on the East Coast it seems.
I think I’m pretty close to the weddingbee demographic — 32, with friends getting married like crazy (OK it is starting to die down a bit) but I love sharing the ideas I see out there and helping others. Hopefully I’ll be able to continue to post ![]()
Full disclosure would solve a lot.
It’s not that people don’t want to read what vendors have to say — it’s that we don’t want to be deceived that they are a fellow bride offering friendly personal advice/ideas for which they have no financial incentive.
So, if the vendors pre-register and disclose that they are vendors, their postings could appear with a vendor icon beside their name or something, so the readers can review vendor comments without feeling misled. (Or readers can decide to skip vendor postings.)
It helps vendors, too, because 1) they are not banished entirely and 2) they don’t have to feel obligated to be anonymous or walk on eggshells about how their draft their posts.
Vendors that don’t register and instead post anonymously to promote themselves will likely eventually be seen for what they are and will lose credibility.
OK here it is, the last time, I PROMISE.
Why should some vendors PAY for advertising, while others get to advertise for free in the comment section?
i kinda like where iris is going. maybe vendors would have a different color for their name. it wouldn’t have to link to their website or link to anything period. the color alone would signify that they are a vendor.
Eric: advertising and commenting on blogs are not the same thing. They are both marketing activities, but not all marketing activities are advertising. Nowadays vendors with any sense will be aware and monitoring the blogosphere, as you do, and I see nothing wrong with adding to the conversation in a constructive way.
Part of the structure of comments on blogs include providing your name and website address if you have one, and if you make a comment, you get a link to your website. That’s part of how all bloggers build traffic, so why can’t vendors provide a link to their website instead of blog? I see nothing wrong if that is the only difference between a vendor comment and a bride comment.
I think helpful and contributing vendors are totally cool and I appreciate them. If you’re offering advice related to your trade on a post requesting opinions about that trade, it would be great if they mention they’re a vendor so we don’t feel deceived. Plus it’s nice to know when someone really knows what they’re talking about.
I think linker and spammer comments should be banned. Your name links to your website if you enter it. You don’t need to provide it twice, that’s just obnoxious.
I agree with Jillian Kay and Laura S. I am also a vendor.
Filling in the website form on blogs is standard blogging MO, and I don’t have a problem with people doing that. It isn’t in your face that way.
Like Jillian, I read Wedding Bee because it is very helpful to know where brides are coming from and you women are just plain good bloggers.
When I comment on Wedding Bee, which is rarely, it is usually in response to an etiquette question, if no one has answered it yet, or from a personal standpoint (I recently gave my opinion on nail polish colors). I use my real name in the post because I am answering from the point of view of a twenty-something woman who likes pretty things, not a vendor.
I agreee that linking in the post is overkill. But I do find it helpful to get the point of view from both sides of the coin.
I’m all for the Helpful and Contributing Vendors. After that, things can start to get annoying.
I would also like to think I’m a helpful vendor - although in the past I didn’t even link to my website in my name, because I was unsure about etiquette for that. I love anything wedding related, and I love reading what’s going on with brides because I can keep current. I like to see what’s going on in message boards and blogs like this, it’s real helpful, and when possible, I like to contribute my own knowledge of things (not necessarily photography) to be as helpful as possible, without doing any advertising. ![]()
I’m a new and only somewhat commenting vendor - when I first read this I thought “oh no - I must’ve been annoying somehow!” but then I read the other vendor comments and realized I’m *definitely* not the only vendor who reads the Hive.
I think about it this way - Wedding Bee is debuting a new topic today - Shutterbugz, for photographers to help the Hive out with some articles. I think it would be hard to be in tune with our brides *without* reading what they’re doing, what they should be doing, etc.
I have WeddingBee linked on my blog, I’m grateful to know what the Bees go through and I’m really glad that I can share this site with my own brides. I know of the 2, 3 and 4’s you all mean though and whatever is decided works for me.
Thanks!
Matt
Mrs. Bee, New York
Age and Occupation: 29, Weddingbee Publisher
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 33, Internet
Engagement Date: May 7, 2004
Wedding Date: March 5, 2005
Venue: Westside Loft, New York
About Me: Yes, my name really is Bee! I love my blogging, wikis, and tabasco sauce!








well, I hope I’m in the “helpful vendor” category. I’m a photographer, and I subscribe to the wedding bee blogs not to advertise, but to learn more about what my excited brides are going through! It helps me remember to give them a little slack when they are late on something or seem a little confused.
But, I do get caught up sometimes and want to comment or offer advice. So my personal policy has been to try to stay away from anything related to photography, unless the bride is specifically asking for advice that I have specialized knowledge on. And then, keep the comment on topic and never promote my own services. (That’s not too hard since there aren’t many brides on here from my area anyway!)
I certainly hope not to offend the integrity of the board, I think it’s wonderful, and I encourage my brides to take a look at it too! What a wonderful support group! If you do decide to not let vendors comment, I will happily stay on the sidelines and observe.