Wedding Vows

May 3rd, 2007 @ 7:37 pm by Mrs. Tomato

I don’t know how many of you out there are writing your own wedding vows, but I came across Elegant Vows today and perused their “Free Wedding Vows Collection.” I found some words in “Vow Three” particularly moving and beautiful….

When you love someone, you do not love them all the time, in exactly the same way, from moment to moment. That is impossible. It is even a disservice to pretend it is possible. Yet that is what most of us demand. We have such little faith in the ebb and flow of life and of love and of relationships.

We leap forward at the flow of the tide and resist in terror its ebb, for we are afraid it will never return. We insist on permanence, on duration, on continuity. But the only continuity possible in life, as in love, is in growth, in fluidity and in freedom, as dancers are free, barely touching as they pass, but partners in creating the same pattern.

This comes at a particularly emotional time, as Mr. Tomato and I just had a huge fight yesterday (we’re okay now) where I’m afraid most of it was my fault. Both of our workloads have recently increased, I’ve been stressed out with family drama, and of course there’s all the wedding planning that needs to be done. As a topper, we’ve been house-hunting for awhile and just lost the bid on a place I really liked. Often I find myself resisting the “flow of the tide” and wish I could just rewind life to where we were more carefree…but then we wouldn’t grow much, would we?

Alas, I’m sure I’m not the only one feeling stressed out balancing work, life, and wedding planning! How do you all calm the nerves and soothe the worries?

On a lighter note, here is a funny Dr. Seuss-style vow written by Marty Blase (his fiance apparently didn’t quite go for it though…)

Pastor: Will you answer me right now
These questions, as your wedding vow?

Groom: Yes, I will answer right now
Your questions as my wedding vow.

Pastor: Will you take her as your wife?
Will you love her all your life?

Groom: Yes, I take her as my wife,
Yes, I’ll love her all my life.

Pastor: Will you have, and also hold
Just as you have at this time told?

Groom: Yes, I will have, and I will hold,
Just as I have at this time told,
Yes, I will love her all my life
As I now take her as my wife.

Pastor: Will you love through good and bad?
Whether you’re happy or sad?

Groom: Yes, I’ll love through good and bad,
Whether we’re happy or sad,
Yes, I will have and I will hold
Just as I have already told,
Yes, I will love her all my life,
Yes, I will take her as my wife!

Pastor: Will you love her if you’re rich?
Or if you’re poor, and in a ditch?

Groom: Yes, I’ll love her if we’re rich,
And I will love her in a ditch,
I’ll love her through good times and bad,
Whether we are happy or sad,
Yes, I will have, and I will hold
(I could have sworn this has been told!)
I promise to love all my life
This woman, as my lawful wife!

Pastor: Will you love her when you’re fit,
And also when you’re feeling sick?

Groom: Yes, I’ll love her when we’re fit,
And when we’re hurt, and when we’re sick,
And I will love her when we’re rich
And I will love her in a ditch
And I will love through good and bad,
And I will love when glad or sad,
And I will have, and I will hold
Ten years from now a thousandfold,
Yes, I will love for my whole life
This lovely woman as my wife!

Pastor: Will you love with all your heart?
Will you love till death you part?

Groom: Yes, I’ll love with all my heart
From now until death do us part,
And I will love her when we’re rich,
And when we’re broke and in a ditch,
And when we’re fit, and when we’re sick,
(Oh, CAN’T we get this finished quick?)
And I will love through good and bad,
And I will love when glad or sad,
And I will have, and I will hold,
And if I might now be so bold,
I’ll love her my entire life,
Yes, I WILL take her as my wife!

Pastor: Then if you’ll take her as your wife,
And if you’ll love her all your life,
And if you’ll have, and if you’ll hold,
From now until the stars grow cold,
And if you’ll love through good and bad,
And whether you’re happy or sad,
And love in sickness, and in health,
And when you’re poor, and when in wealth,
And if you’ll love with all your heart,
From now until death do you part,
Yes, if you’ll love her through and through,
Please answer with these words:

Pastor and Groom: I DO!

Pastor: You’re married now! So kiss the bride,
But please, do keep it dignified.

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9 Responses to “Wedding Vows”

Guest

mee!!

L-O-V-E the dr. seuss inspired vows!! they’d be great to alter and have someone (a kid, preferably) do as a reading.

5/3/07 @ 9:04 pm (reply)

Guest

angels

i love the first reading. i think i might incorporate it. thanks!!

5/3/07 @ 9:45 pm (reply)

Guest

Miss Apple

hey! We’re using that as one of our ceremony readings. It’s titled, “Gift From the Sea” by Anne Morrow Lindbergh. -) Mr. Apple found it and we both really like it.

5/3/07 @ 10:53 pm (reply)

Guest

Alice

I too am going crazy with wedding planning and work. I am very detail oriented so I’ve been spending ALL my free time when I’m not at work with the wedding. My fiance is very laid back and doesn’t know why I stress myself out. He hasn’t helped much with the wedding because he knows I will end up doing over whatever tasks are handed over to him. I haven’t found a way to calm my nerves yet. I often wonder why we aren’t eloping!

5/3/07 @ 11:04 pm (reply)

Guest

My Wedding Blog

vows are important

but many times, people just said it at their wedding and forgot abt it

who memorise it? do you?

anyway it would be good to live by the vows every now and then

in fact everyday!!!!

and every moment of our time

but easier said than done

marriage life is full of ups and downs

5/4/07 @ 12:17 am (reply)

Guest

Kimberly

hahaha so hillarious that Dr. Seuss wedding vow!

5/4/07 @ 1:10 am (reply)

Guest

snot

heh. the dr seuss is cute.

the thing, i think, to remember is that all relationships have difficult times. right now between my job, his job and wedding planning… we really rarely get to spend that much time together just enjoying our time together.

unfortunately though, that is how life sometimes works. once you have children, your life is for your kids. and you have even less time to just be with the one you love.

but i think all relationships must evolve. as you evolve as individuals, your relationship has to evolve with it. and in evolution, there are good times, and there are very difficult times.

but in the middle of all this craziness, honestly, what soothes us both, is to stop and take a moment to (and this will sound cheesy) hug each other, look into each other’s eyes, smile at each other, and kiss. becuase those brief moments are what makes the rest of the world bearable.

that and, we usually have a moment in the day and later in the afternoon to check in on each other and see how the other person is feeling. if one of us is having a more stressful day, the other one tries to help out in some way. whether it’s picking up dinner or doing the laundry so the other person won’t have to worry about it. it’s not that obviously romantic. but to me, it’s very romantic that he loves me enough to want me to relax when i get home and make dinner for me so i can do nothing. heh. i do the same for him sometimes. and usually, we try to do that stuff together.

it’s the little things after all that keep you going ultimately. that, and teamwork.