Beehive
Feature Launched: Aug 31, 2006
About: A forum for readers to post questions and get feedback from the hive, aka the weddingbee community.
In today’s hive:
- Nicole isn’t getting married until March 2009, but people are already asking her where she’s registered. How soon is too soon to register?
To add your question to the beehive, leave a comment below and we’ll update this post to include your question. See all past beehives here.
26 Responses to “Beehive”
im getting married in october, and still havent registered…so I’m no help here 
We registered really late, and a lot of people did not give us gifts. My DH and I are fine with this, but my question is what to do about the registries. We have gift cards that we can use towards our completion registries, but is it rude to do that and leave nothing on the registry for the stragglers? We did not register for much, only stuff that we truly needed, and we just kind of want to get our home situated.
For a wedding in March 2009, it’s definitely too soon to register. Your needs might change by then and a lot of stores frequently change their stock (Crate & Barrell being an excellent example), so things you put on the registry now may not be available in 2009. I would wait until 8-12 months before your wedding (sooner or later depending on your own individual circumstances).
I think it’s too soon as well. I registered at C&B 7 months ahead of time.. and just recently needed to update my registry because some items were out of stock or discontinued.
I agree with MK. If the people asking are people you don’t see often, maybe you could tell them where you are going to register and tell them to check there later on.
i think it’s never too soon to register. once you are engaged, people *are* going to get you engagement gifts. better for them (and you!) if they get you gifts that you will actually use/have space for. you can always return the gifts for store credit if the merchandise changes. or, in the case of Bed Bath and Beyond, for cash.
(this is all with knowledge gleaned from the acquisition of about seven unneeded Waterford vases prior to getting my registry up and running).
:: sigh :: We just went through this. We’re getting married next June, but my FI’s brother and SIL have already started asking us where we are registered. My parents are throwing us an engagement party and the FBIL and FSIL kept saying we needed to register for that! Registering for an engagement party seemed a little bit gift-grabby to me, and etiquette dictates that gifts at an e-party are not to be expected … but we ended up deciding to register at one place for the more traditional stock that probably won’t go away. We went to Macy’s and registered for china and giftware (picture frames, vases, etc). Trying to keep everyone happy ;o)
I am getting married in October as well and still am not registered. I think you have plenty of time Nicole and if you register too early then what about when you changed your mind about what you want?
Nicole — I registered two years in advance of the wedding and found that by the time our big day rolled around, all the stores had turned over their inventory and I had to re-register for just about everything!
However, it can never hurt to pick out some generic things (sheets, plates, glasses, flatware) that are popular in the store and likely won’t go out of season. That way you’ll have a small supply of items for parties and holidays but you won’t have to re-do everything in the future.
PLus it seems like such a hassle, I am dreading registering. Which is part of the reason it is not done yet. PLus then how do you let people know? As far as I am concerned it is word of mouth, so in the end some people will not even know where you are regiostered. no sense in stressing.
Putting together a small registry of things that aren’t seasonal isn’t a bad idea.
We started our registries 10 months ahead of time, simply because people were literally harrassing us about what they could buy for us.
We haven’t even had an engagement party yet, and we’ve received 8-10 gifts. It’s crazy!
Registering was one of the first things we did, about a year before our wedding. It’s a really easy thing to check off the list and a nice thing for you and your FI to do together, maybe make it a date night. There were very few things on our registry that were discontinued, I suspect because we registered for mostly basics and not any seasonal or trendy things. People immediately sent us engagement presents off the registry.
Its never too soon to register, if you are worried about things going out of stock and you don’t plan on having any parties anytime soon (ex. engagement, showers, etc.) then I would say choose somewhere like Bed Bath and Beyond and register for your dishes (both formal and casual) your utensils and a few things like that. Dishes rarely change according to Bed Bath (I asked) and I have noticed that Bed Bath and Macys and a few other stores generally have a very continuous stock of stuff, at least with big items like dishes, electronics, utensils, etc. If you are having a party soon then I would really start your registry asap with at least 2 items per person invited. Good Luck!!!
a question for the bees:
do you prefer bands with diamonds that go all the way around, or a row of diamonds that end where the sidestones end on your e-ring. and why?
I’d think the whole-shebang registry a year in advance, max. The merchandise will change a lot by your wedding date. How nice that people are asking, though! Since they are already asking, might be ok to register for “classic” brands or things that don’t soon turn over, e.g., timeless patterns for silver/china/crystal pattern. Would suck to get half a silverware pattern and it’s discontinued.
I’ve got a question for the hive:
My father insists on walking me down the aisle, but refuses to have a father-daughter dance. I don’t want him to participate in a tradition I find outdated nor want (him giving me away) but not participate in a tradition that I’ve looked forward to since I’ve gotten engaged.
Would it be wrong of me to ask that he dance with me at my wedding AND walk me down the aisle or ask that he do neither?
Our wedding date is June 2008 and we have started working on our resgistry. We’re pretty indecisive, so we’ve found registering to be an exhausting endeavor! To keep our concentration, we’ve broken it down into something we do in stints a little at a time. That’s why I’m glad we’ve started early so we can edit and make changes before anyone will be looking at it. As others above mentioned, we’ve been focusing on the items that department stores always keep in stock and then closer to the wedding and shower, we’ll register for items more likely to be discontinued.
Seems like there are several bees from SF. Can anyone recommend a good/affordable hotel in the San Francisco area? We’re going for our honeymoon in August!
Question for the hive:
How do I tell a very close friend who expects to be a bridesmaid that she will not be part of my wedding party? Or is it just wrong to ask someone who I’m not as “close” with but I think will do a much much better job to be a bridesmaid instead? The basis of my decision is b/c I work a ridiculous amount of hours and need my entire wedding party to lend a helpful hand.
Should I give up on my stationary designer? I contacted her in January for a my September 2007 wedding and I still don’t have my invitation designs! I really lover her work but I’m getting nervous that if she doesn’t deliver soon I’ll be left we no other option but to send Evites. I’ve been emailing her weekly and still haven’t received anything more than preliminary designs. When did everyone else get their invites and should I be frantic or is it too soon to worry?
I know a lot of brides have asked for recommendation for seamstress but so far there hasn’t really been any much response. I’ve bought a wedding gown from sample sale and just need to hem and bustle the gown. My gown is A-line and it really doesn’t need any complicated work on it. I’ve tried calling a few places but they always say that they can’t quote anything without seeing the gown, not even an range. I’m really at a loss right now. The reason I got a sample was to save money and I really don’t want to spend another few hundreds on alteration. Any help please? I’m in Queens btw. Thanks in advance.
I need ideas for bridesmaids’ gifts (4 of them). I’ve already bought the dresses for them, but want to present something (not too expensive as I’m on a budget) to them at the rehearsal dinner. Any ideas?
[…] misslisa wants to know if you prefer bands with diamonds that go all the way around, or a row of diamonds that end where the sidestones end on your e-ring and why? […]
suzi and amy, we’ll post your questions as open questions as they’ll prolly get a lot of responses from readers. 
[…] Suzi asks: […]
Katie Says:
The 31st 2007f May, 2007 at 2:15 pm
Should I give up on my stationary designer? I contacted her in January for a my September 2007 wedding and I still don’t have my invitation designs! I really lover her work but I’m getting nervous that if she doesn’t deliver soon I’ll be left we no other option but to send Evites. I’ve been emailing her weekly and still haven’t received anything more than preliminary designs. When did everyone else get their invites and should I be frantic or is it too soon to worry?
I say maybe I can help you!
http://store.auctiva.com/annies.inv
