Weddingbee Blog

With all this talk of wedding dreams lately, I thought I’d step up and offer a few excerpts from my Wedding Dream Interpretation Handbook, compiled after several minutes’ research. Don’t worry; I’m more than qualified. I took Psych 101.

Dream Element: Rings/garters/wreaths. Meaning: You feel you’re moving in circles. You may be experiencing anxiety about tasks already completed, and feel the urge to double check that your invitations have been addressed correctly. Suggested Remedy: Eat a bowl of Apple Jacks or work on some embroidery. Engage your miniature dachsund in a game of Aerobie. Avoid rubber bands.

Dream Element: Invitations/save-the-dates/marriage license/documents. Meaning: You have subconscious hesitation about the legal aspects of marriage: shared finances, wills, etc. Suggested Remedy: Run a few pages of The Knot magazine through the shredder. Play Sudoku with a feather quill. Don’t order Girl Scout Cookies.

Dream Element: flowers. Meaning: Insecurity about your phsyical appearance. Suggested Remedy: Watch Ugly Betty while leafing through your junior high yearbook. Avoid botanical gardens until after the wedding.

Of course, these are just some of the more common premarital dream motifs. Often, a dream will consist of seemingly unrelated, even bizarre objects and events. Take, for instance, my case study “Molly.”

Molly dreamt that as she was walking down the aisle, the train of her dress caught fire. Everyone screamed and tried to put out the flames by blowing bubbles on her. Only, suddenly, they weren’t bubbles anymore. They were souvenir pennies impressed with the image of David Hasselhoff. The priest kept singing, “You’ve got to lick…it before you stick it!” while trying to calm everyone down, until Molly finally jumped into a fountain of Gocco ink. Then she woke up.

I told Molly that the fire represents her burning passion for her fiance, which threatens to distract her from the much more important task of finding the perfect toasting flutes. I explained she felt unexpressed anger about having to spend time labelling bubble wands with “Air Kisses for the Mr. and Mrs.” instead of watching America’s Got Talent. And finally, I suggested that the Gocco ink fountain represents her insecurities about the tattoo which, much to Aunt Lydia’s shock, will be exposed during the garter dance.

I had no idea what to tell her about the priest.

Anyway, I hope this was of some help. I’m available for private consultation after 3 pm.