Words of Wisdom
Feature Launched: July 9, 2007
About: A forum where users share their best advice on various wedding topics.
New Feature: Words of Wisdom - Newly Engaged
July 9th, 2007 @ 6:27 pm by Words of Wisdom
Where would Weddingbee be without its fantastic readers? Your input, ideas, and insight make it a fantastic resource for brides-to-be, as well as (we hope!) a fun community to “hang out” in.
It’s in recognition of this great community that we’re excited to announce our newest feature, Words of Wisdom.
Here’s how it works: we’ll pose a general, wedding-related question that readers (and bees!) can weigh in on, giving advice and offering insight to help other brides out.
Hopefully, this “hindsight” will be a welcome and helpful resource: a sort of community “hivesight” to make brides’ lives easier. And so, without further ado, our first question:
What advice would you give to someone who is newly engaged?
65 Responses to “New Feature: Words of Wisdom - Newly Engaged”
Take a couple of weeks or a month to really just enjoy being engaged, don’t worry about the wedding planning yet!
Give yourself enough time to plan everything - set the date at LEAST nine months away. Don’t set the date 4 or 5 months away, you’ll be in for a boatload of stress and no downtime.
do your research! i made a few quick decisions before i realized what else was available and while i’m choosing to stay with my original decisions, it could have easily cost me a lot of money to change my mind.
Wait to pick your bridesmaids. I have 7 and wish I didn’t have that many.
Just kidding. I strongly second the notion of taking a while to bask in engagement before picking up a single task.
Don’t do anything else until you have your guestlist. Not just a rough approximation but an actual list.
(1) Take a few weeks to really enjoy your engagement. I rushed in to wedding planning right away, which was fun, but I felt burned out quickly (as did my fiance).
(2) Figure out an approximate guest list before you do anything.
(3) Take your time researching vendors– I made some snap vendor decisions because I was in a hurry to get things booked. I now realize I could have chosen a still-great, but less-costly route.
(4) But don’t take too long– popular vendors (particularly venues and photographers) book early!
(5) Don’t let wedding planning take over your life. There was a point where all I could talk about was my wedding and all I looked at online was wedding websites. I felt like I was becoming a bore. Don’t forget who you were pre-ring! Get invovled, get hobbies, stay active in what’s going on in the world.
(6) Have fun! Being engaged is fabulous and fun– enjoy every minute 
Talk to you FI and figure out what both of you have think of what your dream wedding would be. You’d be surprised he’s thought about it too!
Totally agree with the above poster who said wait to pick your bridesmaids. I picked mine a year and a half out and a lot of things can change in that timeframe.
Also, dont rush into selecting a venue just to get something booked. Make sure its really what you want, bc its the single most important decision you make.
Laura- you stole mine! I totally agree- take a month to enjoy being engaged, the planning starts soon enough!
Seriously, I don’t even know where to start!
DEFINITELY agree with not choosing your bridesmaids too hastily. Also think about the qualities you’re looking for in a bridesmaid - my criteria was just “one of my closest friends”, and it should have been close friends who care about weddings, are organized, and like to plan things. I ended up with a BM who sort of secretly thinks weddings are stupid, and isn’t taking it as seriously as I want her to. Honestly, your BM’s are supposed to really help you, it’s work, and it’s expensive. If you’re not sure about someone, have an honest conversation with them, and give them a chance to back out gracefully, because a BM who feels roped into it will not be a good one.
- I also highly suggest waiting 1-2 months to just browse magazines, websites, and research before making any decisions.
- Go through magazines and tear off any pages that strike your fancy and put it in a binder so that you can later create a look or feel for your wedding.
- Talk to all parties involved and agree to a ballpark budget (again before you start making decisions)
- Don’t drink the Kool Aid and think that your wedding needs to be as elaborate as the ones in the wedding magazines (aka wedding porn)
- Oh and I would highly recommend speaking to your FI re: how involved he wants to be in the wedding planning process (to avoid hurty feelings later on..)
It has already been said, but take a moment to appreciate being engaged. Then, realistically, consider all the logistics that go into planning ANY event and don’t let yourself get sidetracked because it is a wedding…just remember it is an event and you should be able to keep yourself from going overboard.
Ready yourself for the onslaught of advice givers, especially your FILs, and don’t let yourself be trampled on by them. At first I was so glad my FILs wanted to be involved. Only later did I realize that they were planning things for me, picking out what we would eat at the reception etc. They thought since I was present that I was ok with everything they were saying.
I may be in the majority here, but I would say - book your location and photographer as soon as you decide on one!! I wanted my first choice, and even 15 months out - they were booking up fast. I don’t regret jumping into planning right away, getting all my vendors booked left me time during the engagement to take breaks and concentrate on things other than wedding stuff. Even with those breaks, I still got everything done on time or early - and with only 5 days to go…I have nothing left to do except get my hair/makeup done that day and show up! It’s wonderful to be done and have this entire week to relax, hang out with family and friends, and spend time with FI before the craziness begins.
*** I should have said minority. LOL - I guess I’m more sleep deprived than I thought!!
I agree with Jen…I had to book my reception site 18 months out. Now with 15 months to go- I sign photographer and catering contracts this week, and then I can slow down for a while.
Consider having your wedding not during peak wedding season. I think that was the best decision we made. I had little to no competition for photographers and venues in February.
Take a week or two and relax with your fiance. Then pickup Martha Stewart asap! lol j/k Always keep in mind that this is you and your fiance’s day not anybody else’s. Don’t let anyone bully you into thinking you need more/less than what you want. Create a guest list as soon as possible, it will help you immensely when budgeting.
I agree with what someone else said - talk to your Fiance at the beginning and figure out how much he wants to be involved in the process. I made it clear upfront that if he didn’t care about things like flowers, cake details, etc to just tell me - but he said he was interested in helping/going to appointments for everything!
Also - do think about your bridesmaids. Your maid of honor should be someone who is comfortable (and happy to be involved) with planning things like your shower, your bachelorette party, coordinating the other bridesmaids. As for the rest of your bridesmaids - They should be people who will be excited to be helping you through the wedding planning. I asked two friends and my sister - but I knew my sister wouldn’t be big on planning things, so I asked her to be a bridesmaid (not MOH). Which was a good choice. She’s not too girly… so I told her if she didn’t want to be a BM to let me know, but that I did want to offer it to her. She said yes after thinking about it… for a month… last September. Only to back out on me in March, right before it was time to order the bridesmaid dresses for our August wedding. I just let her back out then, I didn’t “force” her into staying in the wedding like my parents wanted me to do.
Lesson: pick bridesmaids who will totally back you up in the wedding planning process and be happy to do so!
About BM’s — Contrary to some opinions above: To me, the attendants should be your nearest and dearest, not the best worker-bees. They’ll be in your photos and your heart forever. People can love you til death and be sincerely happy for you without dedicating too much of their time/money to providing hands-on help. A listening ear and kind heart is just as, if not more, important at this time. Hire some help or find some volunteers to do the hands-on tasks, if needed, so you don’t have to abuse true friends & family.
And as Miranda (SATC) said, “It’s your day. You get a day. Not a week.” It’s easy to get obsessed with the wedding, but remember that everyone else’s lives go on (as should your own, despite the wedding distraction). Your wedding can’t and shouldn’t be the focal point of their world so don’t get too princessy.
Another BM tip: If you have trouble “ranking” them, consider listing them in the program alphabetically, regardless of their titles or the sequence in which they stand.
Consider all of the options out there. I really thought I needed to have a sit down dinner for 150, but after planning it and seeing all of the other cute (and MUCH less expensive) ideas, I wish I had considered other options…An afternoon tea, dessert and dancing, eloping!
The biggest thing that has helped me thus far is staying organized!
I used an old binder I had from college and I have put EVERYTHING in it - vendor contracts, pictures of stuff I love, notebook paper to jot down ideas, receipts from purchases, business cards from vendors, random doodlings. I take it with me to every vendor meeting and everywhere I go, because you never know when the bakery is going to need to know the name of the color you went with for bridesmaid dresses, or what flowers your florist is using.
I got a free planner from a bridal show I went to, but even without it, I would just get folder/dividers to break things into categories (Attire/Beauty, Locations/Receptions/Catering, Flowers/Cakes/Music, etc) so when you need something you know exactly where it is and how to find it.
It has become my brain! And the best part is that I don’t have to bother remembering every detail that we’ve decided on, I can just look it up - less stress for me and leaves room in my little head for other topics that might be of interest to other people!
Plus, when it’s a week before your wedding and you’re trying to pack and move and take care of a million things you won’t have to scramble around trying to gather everything because it will already be in one place!
I know we can all say take your time, don’t rush into planning, but come on ladies - did anyone REALLY follow that advice themselves? I know I didn’t!
Keep it between you and your fiance for a few hours or days before spreading the news. I instantly shared the news and didn’t take time to enjoy it with my man and regret it!
Enjoy the engagement for as long as you can and it’s never too early to start “researching”. You want to be sure you have enough time to look into things that matter most to you and don’t feel silly if your wedding is further away than “normal”. I started planng 18 months in advance and I feel 100% confident that I’ve gotten the best choice of vendors because of my lead time.
talk to recently married friends on which vendors they’d recommend, how they planned their wedding, lessons they learned, etc. married friends are one the BEST resources available…and its free!
If money is or could potentially be an issue…
Find out what your budget is and whos paying for what and when.
once you have a healthy budget together, do the math to figure out how many guests can be invited… if your list is way bigger than that number, figure out who is paying for the overload of guests.
It seems that the party paying the least amount of money seems to think that every person they’ve ever known EVER needs to be invited. The sooner you figure out how much your per person cost is for your dream wedding, it’s a lot easier to let said party know that they can invite X amount of guests or they can pay $$$ per person beyond that…
If you start planning and boking wildly without having the dreaded money talk, it only gets harder once the train is in motion.
OOOH, and Stress B vitamins are a must to keep your complection and mood in order when the stress sets in.
for the most part planning is fun, just be sure to be as polite to your family and future family in the process. It’s hard to find out that no one cares as much about your wedding day as you, sometimes the people you thought would care the most seem to only care about themselves. Be the bigger person, even when the stress is telling you otherwise. Be graceful, and they will come around
To clarify: bridesmaids don’t have to be workerbees, but if someone (even if it’s your sister) doesn’t want to wear a dress and is totally unenthusiastic about being involved in your wedding, she shouldn’t be a bridesmaid.
I agree with above posts regarding choosing BM’s. Make sure they are the very ones you want up there with you. I made the mistake of choosing one of my BM’s because she felt hurt that I didn’t automatically ask her. Your bm’s should be the ones you hold near and dear to your heart.
Preparing for your marriage is more important than preparing for your wedding.
I know it’s been said ten times already but pick your bridesmaids, especially your Maid of Honor carefully! Believe me, I had a bride’s worst nightmare when I found out my maid of honor was the biggest liar, and it started with little lies about dress shopping, which culminated in huge lies about herself. She was a strain on me, when all my other bridesmaids were collectively awesome. After two confrontations, I had enough and pulled her out of the wedding party, but there was no good way to do this that would save anyone’s face. I am glad I did it though because now I have my most dependable, reliable friend as my MOH. Also, I won’t have someone I lost respect for in my wedding day pictures. Don’t believe that just because someone is local and a close friend that they are the ones to ask. An out of town bridesmaid can be really helpful if she loves you and honestly cares about the role. To avoid my mistakes, take your time picking out your maids.
People will immediately start asking you when, where, who your bridesmaids will be, what your colors are, etc. If you haven’t considered your guest list yet, don’t answer hastily, you might end up feeling obligated to invite more people than you can.
Wedding magazines can make you think you need more than you do. Just do your wedding the way you want to. If you need inspiration, look for that, but you don’t need to subscribe to Brides or anything to be a bride.
1. First things first..sit down with your fiance and discuss what you BOTH want for the wedding. Get an idea of the direction you want to go BEFORE you discuss the wedding with anyone else. I’ve noticed a lot during our planning that other people’s opinions have REALLY influenced some of the decisions. Things would have been different. So, don’t let other people’s opinions be a factor in your wedding decisions.
2. Next, start with your budget. Make it as detailed as possible. Make it realistic. Do some research. This will be your guide.
3. Set your guestlist. Start a list of people you want to be there.
4. Start booking vendors.
5. Don’t pick your bridal party too early. Things change.
1. Do a short engagement. Drawing it out over a year only dampens your excitement and leads to you changing your mind after awhile.
2. If you are doing a long engagement, or have just graduated from college, wait as long as possible to choose your wedding party. I can’t count how many brides I know who didn’t wait and regretted it later as friends grew apart or changed.
3. Look at a real, honest to goodness guest list first before doing anything else. This is the one item that will give you a true picture of what you can look at and afford. The number of guests will affect every cost and every decision.
4. Sit down with one of Martha’s budget planners and make a copy for both you and your fiance. Have each of you fill it out and then compare. It is the only honest way to see what you are each thinking and it will reveal areas you have in common and areas that each of you find useless. He inevitably will care little about flowers. Be prepared to explain their cost and importance. Add at least 20% to the budget you arrive at.
5. Talk to no one but your fiance about what you want for the wedding. Get a clear picture of what it is you both are dreaming of. Then move forward and inform others (parents, siblings, etc) of your desires. This way it remains what you want and one of you doesn’t feel that the other’s mother is unduely influencing, etc. Agree to not deviate from your budget or plans without consulting the other one first. ( Even if you are in the store and the great pink flower girl dress is on sale and your mother is pressuring you but you know you agreed on a white one. ) Sticking to this rule hard and fast will send a good subliminal message to your parents and family that you two are a team now, and there will not be an opportunity to get between you. I can’t stress how important a united front is on everything, it sets up a great precedent for your married life.
6. ENJOY IT. Once it is gone, its gone and you can’t ever get it back.
1. Meet all family members from both side and enjoy the congrats and welcomes. It will help you to figure out the tradition/style/tastes of family and it also builds a good support system.
2. Make a detail buget(there are many tools available) then add 20% to it. It will always cost more than you think.
3. However, spurge on a few things and stick to those a few things. If I could do it again, I’d spurge on location and photographer. I could have done without wedding favors, expensive shoes, other details.
4. Get your fiance involved in the planning. It’s one of the most intimate experience you can share.
Recognize that your parents and FIL’s are going through changes, too: 1) taking a back seat to their son/daughter’s new spouse and 2) becoming an in-law to their son/daughter’s new spouse. Be patient as they make their adjustments, but also remember that you and your DF have your own adjustments to make as you become your own family unit. Turn to DF more than to Mom & Dad.
enjoy being engaged with your fiance for a while, there is no need to have made a million decisions in the first month unless you are getting married in 1/2 a year
negotiate the catering first, and often the fee for the space is waved (assuming in house catering.) at least this is the case for booking other kinds of events.
I agree with Manda. We keep to our engagement to ourselves until we got home a few days later. It was the best nobody to ask questions and we just enjoyed the moments that we had alone.
enjoy the engagement. don’t let others feel pressured into setting things before you feel like it.
if you need your BMs to help out a whole lot, pick those that you know will help out. if you just want those that are important to you to stand up with you, pick them. wait to pick out your BMs. think carefully.
if you’re not a DIY person, don’t stress about trying to do everything yourself. it’s okay to hire someone else to do it!
if you really like something and know you’ll have room in the budget or will make room in the budget, book it. i had to book my venue 20 months in advance in order to get my date. (i’m getting married around NYE…)
don’t let the wedding take over your life. it’s just a day. you have the rest of your life with this person. no one will remember what the centerpieces or favors were in 5 years, but they will remember if you were a b*tch during the process.
I found it really important and helpful to pick my top five priorities. I discussed them with my fiance, we decided what was important to us and what we are willing to compromise on. I knew location and a photographer were incredibly important but I could care less about favors or letterpress. It really helped us when it came to budgeting and letting our parents have input aka picking our battles.
Speaking of battles, do your research and don’t be afraid to ask local brides what their average vendor prices are. When I had to argue that $2,000 for a photographer was a steal I had numbers to back up my argument
Oh and after the initial exciting rush, try and limit your wedding planning time each day so you don’t burn out..
i agree. i waited 8 months before asking my bridesmaids. Dont give into every “trend.” you dont have to do OOT giftbags, etc!
When you make a decision, stick to it and don’t keep going back to the “what if I had chosen xyz” game. There will be many other grand weddings with cool ideas, you don’t have to do them all.
Get a USB Flash Drive and start saving all the pictures you like AND note where you got them in the filename. There are still pictures I saw in the beginning of my planning that I still can’t find again.
Also - start a spreadsheet of venues and vendors you have researched and their rates, etc. Once you have looked at 10 venue websites, you won’t remember one from the other and it helps to have the comparison right there.
Talk to friends or family members who have been to recent weddings or were recently married. Recommendations either for or against a vendor can be your best advice and you want to gather advice from those you trust.
Wedding ideas can be overwhelming. I sat down and decided my three priorities for the wedding that I wanted to splurge on and that helped keep my spending in check.
Prioritize! Sit down with your sweetie and talk about what you see for your engagement period, your wedding, and your marriage. Make a list of what’s important to both of you & refer to it at different stages in this process (and the rest of your life). It’s so great to talk out these things just the two of you - *before* everyone around you gives you their opinions.
I refer back to my list when I’m feeling overwhelmed with the whole wedding process. It keeps me sane, and I know we’re being true to ourselves.
Like other posters have said, prioritize. My DH and I each picked a few things which were important to us (cake, photography, etc.) and spent more on those.
However, before you even do that, talk to your FI about the kind of affair you are picturing. Maybe you want a casual BBQ while he wants a full church wedding. It’s important to figure out your visions early on, and find a way to merge them.
Resist the temptation to pick ur bridal train … i mean RESIST it…and do your research really widely before making important decisions….however try to pick your date and stick to it, so everyone has enough notice….enjoy the time cos after that,ITS ON and its NOT OVER till the you are installed in your new nest
I second LAGirl23’s advice about the flash drive! I keep all my files on a single drive, and then it’s easy to take your notes with you between work and home, etc.
Breathe. Wait a while before making any decisions and buying anything/putting down a deposit. I changed my mine on invitation colors only AFTER running around town purchasing all the plum-colored cardstock I could find.
Prioritize a few items that you’re willing to spend more on– make sure you discuss this with your fiance, or there may be arguments later! Figure out a general budget, and make it LESS than you can afford… because you’re going to go over. (and if you don’t, good for you!)
two things…
1) BIG PICTURE- there is just so much that goes into wedding planning. and the day itself can get so hectic. but in the end, all that matters is that you get married and you and your guests have a great time! try to remind yourself of this during the wedding planning process. ^_^
2)”What’s more important than the wedding day itself is how you’ll live your lives together AFTER the wedding is over.” -advice from Papa Peach to me
Talk to the people who are going to be most involved in the decision-making (your fiance, your mother, whoever) and figure out which one or two things are MOST important to them. Compare these things to what are your most important things, and balance accordingly. I’ve seen priorities change so drastically in the last six months, it makes my head spin!
1. Don’t forget about the MARRIAGE in the midst of all the planning for the WEDDING. Take time to be with your SO and remember why you made the choice to say “yes.”
2. I actually disagree with the posters who say to give yourself lots of time. We had to wait a year to get married b/c FH’s cousin’s date was already set for 10 months out and we didn’t want to pre-empt them, but I’d have done it sooner if I could have — less time for hemming and hawing!
3. Don’t start planning right away. I did, and it was a huge mistake. Take time to enjoy being engaged!
My recommendations would be to write all your thoughts down! Brainstorm! Every time I had any sort of thought or idea I would try and just write it down somewhere. Eventually I starting writing everything in the same place. If you don’t write your ideas down, you’ll forget them and feel like even more of a mess. It always helps me to organize my thoughts!
Create some sort of a filing system to organize everything. In my opinion, you do NOT need to purchase any sort of wedding planner. Most of that information you can get for free either online or in magazines.
Do give yourself time if you can - my engagement was only 9-10 months long, and although that’s plenty of time, sometimes its nice to have the time to really research vendors, etc. While I admire those who have planned significant weddings in like 2 months, personally, I could not handle it. 9 months is hard enough!
Really look for dresses. Don’t make any sort of rash decision. Give yourself time to shop and start shopping right away. You will undoubtedly see a dress after you order your own that you might really like, but just try not to look at any dresses after you order yours!
Also, I had a reality check this weekend when I attended my cousin’s wedding. It was really hyped up and although it was fun, I realized that when it comes right down to it, it’s a wedding and you are getting married. Hours upon hours of planning intricate centerpieces will give your guests an initial punch, but after everyone has sat down the centerpieces are barely noticed. Try to focus less on impressing others and more on making it a fun, meaningful day for you and your families.
One more thing! While at my cousin’s wedding this weekend, I realized that you really have to make sure your guests feel appreciated and welcomed at your event. It is not a day in the park picking out a present, filling the car up with gas, booking a hotel and coming to your wedding - make the rounds around the tables and even if you don’t talk to every single person, at least look around, make eye contact, and make sure to make some sort of speech thanking everyone for coming. Before last weekend I imagined my cousin’s wedding being this big family fun thing, and she basically spent the whole time with her new husband and all her friends. Our side of the family never once danced with her or shared any moment more than a minute long. As much as it is your day, really try to make people feel like it matters they are there.
Ok I’m done!!!
I agree with a lot of the advice above. My advice is a little weird… Take care of your hands and fingers! I’m notorious for having hands that look like I ran them through a paper shredder. Not a nice match for my gorgeous engagement ring. 
Take a few minutes every day to put on some lotion, keep your nails/cuticles neat, and make sure those hands are worthy of that ring!
I would echo those who say a short engagement is not a bad thing. I planned my wedding for 100 people (it could have been 150, I was so relieved when those “no” RSVP’s came back) in seven months. Granted, if you live in a larger city this may not be possible. But the longer you give yourself to plan, the larger the wedding plans become and the harder it seems to get everything done. I actually started planning immediately and really pushed to get everything done as quickly as possible so that by the wedding weekend, I had a minimal amount to do and it really worked out well.
I loved planning the wedding, so much so that I dream about giving up my job to become a planner. But being married is so nice (all two weeks of it!) that I’ll just content myself with the latest edition of Martha Stewart.
And congratulations to those who are newly engaged! Mazel Tov!
TOTALLY agree with Tricia (#53). You never know when someone will want to see that ring again and grab your hand…
I agree with so much of the above ‘big picture’ advice.
1) Spend time to enjoy being engaged to the person you are madly in love with. it passes so quickly.
2) make a list of shared priorities in life and for the wedding and check in with each other regularly… (great comment a-seattle). it’s neat to see that though some details change, you are together because you are passionate about the same things.
3) we get to do this once (if all goes right) find vendors who understand that though they see a million weddings a year, you get one. (i’ve seen too many annoyed/ lackluster vendors or staff at different family weddings.)
4) have fun! this is a big chunk of a few months or years of our lives, but not the whole deal. it’s too short not to enjoy the path leading to be married!
congrats to the newly engaged!
register for the nicest sheets in the world - heaven!
We planned our wedding in about five months. That time frame might not work for everyone but it worked for us.
I think the best thing I did was not micromanage our paid professionals. I had one meeting with the florist, picked out the flowers I liked, discussed the bouquets, bouts, centerpieces and then let her do her thing. With the band we chose our first dance songs and told them which of their songs we really wanted to hear (and no chicken dance) and let them play what they wanted (we had seen them play another wedding felt very confident about this). We discussed table arrangements with the on-site coordinator and then let them set it up. Were the tables exactly like we talked about? I have no idea. I was too busy enjoying my reception!
The only person I’d wished I’d been more specific with was the photographer. We did photos in two locations after the ceremony (outdoor then indoor) and the set up time between took too long. If I realized how long that was going to take I would have scrapped the outdoor photos.
Thank you all, this is good to know. I may need advice on how to deal with parental pressure (they live in NJ and want to have the wedding there, I live in MD with my FI and want to have it here, AND they want to invite 200 of their friends and family!). Good thinking to the Bee team for this new feature!
Annie -
We had some pressure to deal with as well. We live in NJ, Fi’s parents live in FL, my parents live in upstate NY along with some of both of our families, and most of the rest of the family lives in the NY/OH/CT area. Since most people we’d be inviting (both family and friends) are closer to NY or have some connection to NY we are having it there. Turns out it’s also cheaper in upstate NY than it would be in NJ.
Cute feature
Do NOT invite women to be your bridesmaids until you are absolutely what size and kind of wedding you will have. If you choose 5 and then decide to scale back the guest list to 50, you can’t UNinvite bridesmaids.
Hold your tongue.
Have fun! And remember, your groom is far more important than any single wedding detail you think is important right now.
[…] New Feature: Words of Wisdom - Newly Engaged by Words of Wisdom […]
Like everyone else has concurred, enjoy the sheer giddy feeling you will experience only once as a woman engaged, first. I had been planning my wedding since forever, so I already had pretty much everything in sight.
Make a check sheet of all components of the wedding and collect in an organized folder your ideas for each component.
Choose your bridal party carefully. Mine certainly provided me with a few headaches that I wasnt expecting. I found the wedding and engagement process a very interesting way for those around you to show their true colors, so pay attention to the off hand remarks.
This is truly yours and your future husbands day: Do not forget that. Do what is best for the both of you! You will go crazy trying to make everyone else around you happy. This is a sacred/intimate event, remember that!
