Wedding Blog

We are having a DOC, and the closer we get to the wedding date (2 mos away right now), the firmer I am in my belief that it is the best $$ we will spend on the entire wedding.

I originally felt the same way you do, that I have plenty of capable friends and family members, and it’s only a matter of being organized and delegating tasks. However, I’ve come to realize that no one will care about this as much as I do, and understandably so. It sounds sort of messed up, but I don’t want to have to trust my family/guests with important tasks, I want them to be able to relax and have fun, and to eliminate the possibility of tension between us (ie - me turning bridezilla on them for fooling around when they should be tying ribbons around the tin pail handles dammit!). Also, our DOC is going to “break-down” the wedding at the end, and take all of our stuff back to the hotel in her van - I can’t imagine me in my dress and my BM’s at midnight trying to pack up vases and centerpieces (they have to be out by 10am the next morning, as there’s another wedding that day).

We have been fine doing the planning on our own, with minimal guidance from our DOC (and most of the guidance is to make sure her job is easier on the day of - example - have you ever worked with/had problems with this videographer, we’re thinking of hiring them). But the day of, I really want to relax, and let my family and guests relax, secure in the knowledge that everything will go as I planned. I also think Mrs. Pumpkin feels strongly about this after NOT using a DOC herself.

Good luck in whatever you decide to do, but we are UBER happy that we’re using a DOC.

Forbidden fruit! So funny. But alas it is forbidden for me as well. I do have a friend of a friend that is dabbling in coordinating business so I have asked her to help out with the visual setup that I need at the reception site. Thankfully the church has a coordinator that was included in with that bundle of costs. She is wonderful! I don’t have a thing to worry about at the church. But hiring a whole day coordinator was not something I was willing to spend the money on, but I have heard they are well worth it.

i hired a coordinator and it was the best money ever spent! if budget is an issue, i would go ahead and at least hire a doc or month of. there are too many horror stories out there not to hire one!

We hired a wedding planner, and I’m so very grateful we did (FH had to talk me into it, because I was afraid he/she wouldn’t listen to our very specific ideas about what we want) — so far, we’ve been heard on everything, and have been able to concentrate on executing on our vision instead of racing around meeting with vendors, only to find they’re not in our budget.

Probably what I like the most, I think, is how I’m not second guessing our vendor choices — our planner presented us with several choices for photography, catering, flowers, etc. in our price range, and we were able to meet with them and choose from there. She’s worked with all of them before, so she knows how they really work.

And, being able to turn all the day of details over to her will take a lot off my mind and spirit that day — w really didn’t want our friends and family to have to work at our wedding - we do want them to be able to relax and enjoy it as much as we will

I have at DOC which happens to be my floral designer. It worked out great because she’ll already be at the event and her fees were very reasonable because we didn’t have to pay for an extra body. I’m happy because she’ll really “get” our vision since she’s not just coordinating the day, but designing the florals.

We’re also hiring a lighting vendor who has done music and lighting in the wedding industry for the past 12 years. when we met with him, he told us that if we had to choose between his services or a DOC, he would tell us to go with the DOC.

do you have a family member or friend that wants to gain wedding experience? this also could be an option for you.

I talked to five different coordinators ranging in price from $500 for DOC to $10000 for full-on planning. I ended up with one for $750 for DOC plus partial help along the way. So far I am so glad that I did, as she is amazing at bouncing ideas off of, suggesting ways to tweak ideas and make them even better, and even getting us a couple of deals with vendors. So I would highly recommend at least a little help- I have really loved it. Even if you don’t plan on hiring one, at least call around, see what the prices are, and talk to a few. I actually picked up quite a few tips just from the initial phone conversations with the women that I didn’t end up hiring. Hope that helps

We didn’t have one…in our circle (of lower middle class southern weddings) it’s just not something you do. Why? Beyond the financial factor, it’s because there’s always some older woman who has served as a DOC for so many weddings that she’s able to do this for the family. This becomes her gift, and it’s even more special because she’s usually someone you’ve known for quite a while. Mine was my elementary school librarian, who had also worked with my mom.

Yes, we were making our own decorations, and I was in my dress at midnight helping take things down, along with my closest friends and family members. But that’s part of the togetherness of our kind of wedding. Having helped other family members do this I was able to go into my wedding knowing how much work went into things, and also having an idea of what kinds of things would work in certain spaces. It was like pre-planning without the giant notebook.

Anyway, I just wanted to present this different view of doing things, and to show that the hard work isn’t always a burden or something that’s resented.

btw i paid $1500 in march (off season). they now charge $2500 in nyc. you can probably find someone in the $1000 range in the palm springs area?

I work in TV production and I hired a friend/co-worker to be my DOC. I paid her her usual day rate ($400) for when she coordinates commercials and she was worth every cent.

I planned the entire wedding myself and in the days before I showed her the plan, gave her all my vendors contracts and contact info, and on the day of, as of the moment I stepped in to get my hair done, I worried about NOTHING. And neither did my bridesmaids, or mom, or friends. She helped me enjoy the 1000’s of hours of planning I put into the day.

It’s worth considering…depending on the value it would add for you.

Miss Peppermint:
you’ve had a lot of comments so far but I wanted to post a comment from a DOC’s point of view.
I have been event planning for over 5 years and recently decided to get into wedding planning in Vancouver BC. I posted an ad on Craigslist under event services and said that the first 3 or 4 people to contact me would get my services for free this summer. Well, about 40 emails later, I chose the first 4 who had emailed me and met with them all and took on their weddings this summer.
I didn’t feel right about charging since I was trying to build my business and hadn’t actually coordinated a wedding where I wasn’t working on behalf of the hotel.

I don’t know if you would like to go this route but you may want to consider checking out Craigslist or any other boards where Coordinators may be new to the wedding side of things but not new to Event Planning. You can get a good feeling right off the bat(or bad one) about someone by the way that they answer questions or ask questions about your wedding. I’m not saying that you will find someone who is willing to work for free (this has been a huge amount of work for me with my full time job), but you may be able to pay a newbie half of what anyone else would charge and they will want to do such a great job, you just might get better service than if you hired someone who’s been doing this for 10 years!

Good Luck!

Our church came with a DOC that I’ve known for years and is the mother of several friends. I was so excited she was going to help coordinate our wedding…and so was she! She even waived her fee for us (she comes with the church) & I won’t have to worry about anything for the ceremony or the small reception we’re having right afterward.

That evening, we’re having a larger reception in the ballroom of the hotel where most of our guests (it’s my hometown - semi-destination for about 3/4 of our guests) are staying for family and OOT friends. My aunt (who just really enjoys doing stuff like this) volunteered to come up the Wednesday before our Saturday wedding, make sure we get all our last-minute things done and has “assembled a team” (her words, not mine :P) to help set up the ballroom according to our specifications. Since she’ll be around the days before the wedding, I’ve no doubt I’ll be able to show her exactly what I want.

Hiring a DOC was never in our budget b/c we WANTED to do it ourselves and our family offered to help us pull it off. It means a lot to me that they want to help and I trust them so much more than I would a stranger.

On the other hand, I’m not an incredibly “it has to be just so” person, so if things don’t work out exactly how I want I don’t think I’ll mind too much. If that will bother you however, maybe you should consider a DOC ’cause if they’re good they’ll probably give you *exactly* what you’ve envisioned.

I have a DOC (she’s required for the planner) and a wedding planner that doesn’t do the full-on planning for us, but helps us with what we need. She gives us vendor recommendations, plays bad guy, gets us the best deals, and keeps me SANE. She knows what she’s doing, so when I feel like I’m behind or crazy, she just makes me seem like I’m ahead.

it’s a lie, but I feel better.

I really feel like I’m a huge proponent for that only because I’m completely insane and feel frazzled 99% of the time, so just knowing I have someone with a net, makes it me feel better!

And having one person to do all the stuff outside and know what’s going on as well as you the day of… it’s just one thing less to worry about while your hair is being burned off, your makeup is ruined, and your dress is torn in half. at least the place settings are perfect.

Honestly, the money we spent on our day-of coordinator was probably some of the best money that we spent on the wedding. While a little expensive, it was such a relief to have someone to turn to when I needed something. We met with her just a couple of times before the wedding and she came to the rehearsal. She followed up with our vendors, set up much of the reception, and even bought me a purse because she knew that I didn’t have one! She helped clean up and managed anything that needed to be done so that my husband, mom, and I wouldn’t need to worry about things. She came up with things at the reception site of which I don’t know the origin (candles, extra vases, the list goes on) and even talked the reception venue into buying our centerpiece vases after the wedding.

I know coordinators can be expensive, but when I think about all of the work she put in and how much help she was, it was definitely worth it.

If you’re looking for a cheaper option… One of my friends just got married last week and hired two of her friends to be “coordinators” for the day. Any chance you know anybody that could be of some help?

If you end up not getting a coordinator, I would just offer a bit of advice: write down EVERYTHING- (phone #s of all vendors, parents, bridal party, etc), time line, what jobs are designated to whom… and make sure that there is one person that anyone can go to if they have a question (and make sure that they have a copy of your info. list).

Regardless, I’m sure you will be fine. Try not to stress too much… good luck!!

oh… yes hire a DOC!!! seriously, it is worth the money. our site had a wedding coordinator assigned to me, and i still hired on someone for month-of. i just didn’t want to worry about a thing. it wasn’t too much cash to pay for the peace of mind that my husband and i had on our special day. heck, just being able to answer my mom with “don’t worry the DOC is taking care of it” was worth the money!
my wedding was in san diego, email me if you want my coordinators info, she was really great. I am pretty sure she’s done palm springs wedding before.
sarah

I hired a DOC and it’s been a blessing! It gives me the freedom to keep planning the wedding I want without the hassle of thinking of the those little details on the day of the wedding. I originally asked my friends to help me coordinate but that was received with a lot of anxiety.

I hired a DOC who is also our florist. My fiance and I debated about this for a long time, because in some respects it could be a waste of $500.

However, we’re having our wedding as a “getaway” weekend in a resort town about an hour away from where we live, so it became worth it to us not to have to ask our moms/friends (MANY of whom are flying/driving EXTREMELY long distances) to give up part of their vacation to oversee details — in a city they’re not familiar with, to boot.

So far, I have loved my DOC (we’re working on stuff in the 6 weeks leading up to the wedding to get her organized for the big day) and would recommend it to anyone. It’s a small price to pay for me not to have to worry about stuff the day-of.

I am not hiring a DOC but I did highly consider it. The only reason I didn’t was my event manager at the reception site said she would handle all the little things for me. I think a DOC can really take a load off you and can be the best money spent. This would take the load off of having to ask friends and never really knowing if they will follow through. I think a wedding planner and DOC may be very useful in situations where the reception and ceremony site are in very different locations or if there is alot of coordination issues and guests.

[...] Miss Peppermint’s post the other day reminded me that I wanted to write this…I used to be an event planner for a [...]

[...] undecided about whether or not a wedding day coordinator is a good investment, check out this WeddingBee post and see what other brides across the globe [...]

Holy Cow! That’s unbelievable!! Obviously you never really know someone from meeting them once. I have a friend that works at the Hotel Del Coronado where one of the investigations is centered and she’s looking into it.

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