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I haven’t talked much about my dress, I’m guessing because I never was 100% sure I got the right one. It’s coming back to haunt me, 5 months later.Does anyone else feel like being pressured to find a dress months before your wedding date puts it on the urgent to-do list? I wish I had spent a whole lot more time prior to my engagement looking at gowns so I had more research under my belt… alas, I waited until months after my ring was on my finger to look at dresses.
Before I go on, I want to start by saying I do love it. I’m just not sure it’s 100% me, and I’m worried about how I’ll feel several hours into the reception.
This is it, the “drama in the back” Monique Lhuillier Scarlet.
It’s an all outdoor, lounging, games, activity wedding, which had not yet been planned out when I ordered my gown (again, why do we have to do that so early?) so it hadn’t been a huge concern of mine to find something really easy to move around in. Now I have this beautiful, elegant, but not exactly comfortable dress and I’m regretting it. Mr. GB is concerned that I’ll look uncomfortable, or will spend a great deal of time adjusting it to try and make myself feel more secure.
We had considered getting a different one and trying to sell my current gown to recoup the losses, or getting a second reception gown - but I feel mildly defeated. I’m not sure whether it’s worse for me to feel slightly uncomfortable at my wedding or just really really guilty if I do buy something else.
Today, he sat me down and told me to do what I wanted and we’d figure it out either way. That makes me feel more guilty. It’d been better had he said “no, stupid!”
So is it better to be guilty or to be uncomfortable? Has anyone else felt like they regretted their purchase and what did you do?
I just bought my second dress 4 weeks before my wedding (the salon had it rushed) and I can’t express in words how relieved I feel. You’re putting too much into this day to have to look down during all of it and think “wow I hate my dress.” Go for the guilt. Go for it.
We switched from a summer wedding to a winter wedding and I’m always cold and wanted sleeves, so I bought another dress.
Now I have a 2-piece strapless lace-up corset Maggie Sottero (white, silver stitching) to sell. Anyone?
can you alter this dress to make it more comfortable? miss peppermint blogged about the same dress last week.
I love that dress, but you have to comfortable. Do think that a new dress will be “comfortable” — I thought these things are never comfortable!!
that dress is soooo gorgeous. it’s classy, simple, and sexy!
Sigh. I had to go out and buy a new dress. Well, “had to” may be a bit much, but honestly, that’s how I felt. I also felt stupid and guilty about buying another dress, but no matter how much I tried, I just couldn’t love the first one. Why did I buy it then, you ask?
I honestly don’t really know.
I would have to agree with Jen. I’m not sure how comfortable wedding dresses can be. I love the lines of your current gown and feel like it would be fine for an outdoor wedding. I guess the million dollar question is: what would you buy if you do get another one?
Miss GB,
Your dress is really lovely, elegant, sexy, and stylish. Most of the dresses designed by Monique are ver comfortable when it’s on. Maybe i’m biased because I’ve got one of her dresses. It’s worthwhile going back to try it on just to feel what’s it’s like on you.
But at the end of the day, you need to be comfortable in your dress. I’ve seen brides who are uncomfortable and it can ruin the look.
I think buying anything that doesn’t come in for months would cause anyone some second thoughts. Especially something as big as a dress! I think you should wait until it comes in and you start having it fitted so you can actually have a good idea of how it feels (you can sit and crouch and do jumping jacks in it then), and then if you feel uncomfortable, you could always buy something simple and white, but comfortable. There have been lots of options on here and other wedding blogs about affordable gown options, so you wouldn’t have to feel TOO guilty, right?
I forgot to say that I really really think that the gown is stunning. It’s so pretty from the front, and then when you walk by the guests and they see the back, their mouths will be agape!
god, i love that dress… i’m also mildly regretting my dress cuz i really never envisioned a big poufy one. ummm, if you’re gonna sell your dress, can you contact me? if it’s reasonable, it might be my 2nd dress.
but for you, i say be comfy, love your dress, cuz forever and ever, you’ll look back on pictures and you don’t want your first thoughts to be “i hated that dress” every time you see it. :\
1) We hear this ALL the time! You are not alone!
2) I have a second dress because I was sort of forced into my first…so I understand…but many brides say, after some time, they fall in love with their first dress again. Perhaps you will too?
Don’t forget about dress tapes and glues this may be just the problem solver to help you feel comfortable.
Your dress is gorgeous and I think it could certainly work for an outdoor wedding. I don’t think wedding dresses are every really physically comfortable, so the most important thing is that you need to be emotionally comfortable in it. To make you feel good in it, perhaps you could make your hair, shoes and other accesories more playful to match the mood of your wedding.
Beautiful dress! I’d love to take it off your hands if it was in my size!
I wonder if this might be an option for you. It sounds like you love the look of this dress but are unsure about your comfort level during the reception. Why don’t you have a second dress for the reception and just get one of those simple, inexpensive gowns from Target or J. Crew as your second gown for the reception? They sure won’t break the bank (I think the most expensive one is $160) and they are very pretty and bridal, just simple clean lines which is why you save money.
I just thought this might be a way for you to save yourself the discomfort AND the guilt. Let us know what you decide.
I should clarify I meant wear the Monique dress you posted here for the ceremony and change into a second dress for the reception.
I LOVE that dress, but it was so out of my price range. I never got to try it on either… *sigh* If you LOVE it then you should keep it and get a 2nd dress for the reception. You can get something fun for the reception, it doesn’t even have to be bridal maybe even something you can wear again…
I think some wedding gowns are comfortable, but this one has no structure and very little options for security to build in, so I feel a little uh… “free” It’s not uncomfortable in that restraining way, more that I feel like I’m not going to be strapped in and with all the running around, I envision my boob flying out.
If I start getting it altered, I’m worried I won’t be able to sell it because of my size. 
Time to hope that I win the lottery I don’t play so I will be guilt free about all random demands and changes! woohoo!
who cares about comfort when you’ve got that gorgeous ML gown and the body to pull it off?!
i wore ML as well and was a bit bummed when my MIL told me i had to change at least once. i ended up changing into a qi pao, then a hanbok, and then back into my ML dress for the father/daughter dance and the rest of the reception. there was no way i’d spend the reception in a $200 qi pao or a rented hanbok when i had this gorgeous wedding dress i’d only get to wear once in my life!
there will be so much going on the day of your wedidng that you won’t even notice the fit of the dress. i wore 4.25″ heels all day/night and didn’t even feel the pain till the party ended. =)
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Mrs. Gummi Bear, San Francisco Age and Occupation: 25, Japanese Importer/Illustrator Fiance's Age and Occupation: 24, Game Developer/Programmer Engagement Date: April 15, 2006 Wedding Date: October 13, 2007 Blogging Since: June 19, 2007 Venue: Organic farm an hour from San Francisco About Me: I live for anthropologie, design blogs, sweets, japanese zakka, and vintage goods. We just bought our first home together and live with our two puppies and cat - it's a strange mixture of vintage, high-tech (we have 7 computers and 21 video game systems in all), and a whole lot of fur. Our wedding tries to embody the Japanese idea of "slow life", which is truly taking the time to enjoy food, company, and your environment!
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