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Mrs. Petunia, Ft. Lauderdale Age and Occupation: 31, College Professor Fiance's Age and Occupation: 29, Engineering Student/Part-time Barista Engagement Date: December 8, 2006 Wedding Date: March 2, 2008 Venue: Riverside Hotel Blogging Since: August 6, 2007 About Me: Our original idea of running off to get married quickly turned into an event with 100+ guests once other people got involved and I, too, got swept away in the lovely madness that is wedding planning. Mr. Petunia and I are obsessed with all things World of Warcraft, Monopoly, and Nintendo, so we’re planning on including some fun “game-y” details into our wedding.
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Awake and Agreeable

August 13th, 2007 @ 11:03 am by Mrs. Petunia

My ring bearer is, speaking strictly in terms of etiquette, past his prime. In fact, Ms. Peggy Post would say he’s over-the-hill. Sure, they will say he looks adorable in this picture, but this was taken about 3 years ago at his Kindergarten graduation. Will anyone question the 8 year-old giant he will be by the time the wedding rolls around? After all, the wedding etiquette book says a ring bearer is supposed to be between 3 and 7 years old.

I have endeavored to acquiesce to Ms. Post, but I’m afraid on this, I have to challenge the etiquette maven. An intelligent and poised boy, the best thing about having my gorgeous (and older) ring bearer is that I won’t have to dispense with the recessional walk because of a “child [who] has fallen asleep…or is in any way disagreeable.”

Plus, I’ve already disobeyed Ms. Post in other matters on this subject. I’m told this ring bearer is to walk down the aisle and carry “the wedding rings (or a reasonable facsimile) on a small cushion.” Instead, I’ve opted for a $19 pewter ring I plan to embellish with ribbons in our wedding colors.

I expect my darling ring bearer (and beautiful nephew) will be on his best behavior. That is, unless he reaches the end of the aisle and tosses the ring out into the guests like a Frisbee, as Mr. Petunia has, only half-jokingly, instructed him to do, being not-so-much a fan of the pewter ring.

Who else is having an alternative to the ring pillow and what are you using in its stead? (I see that the porcelain orb may become a popular substitute!)

19 Responses to “Awake and Agreeable”

1.
Lori says:

I wouldn’t worry about it. My flower girl is nine years old. (Small for her age, but nine nonetheless) We were originally going to make her a junior bridesmaid, but the flower girl dresses fit her better.

I think this whole age limit thing is a little too serious. :-)

2.
Delinda says:

we are on the other extreme…our flower girls will be 9 1/2 and 10 months old..so their baby babies…they will be pulled down in a decorated wagon…but I agree…have who you want and sometimes its ok to not follow rules…and be a rebel :)

3.
bunnybride says:

I am sure he will be a charming and dutiful ring bearer unless that rebel-rousing Mr. Petunia has his way with the pewter ring tossing into the crowd.

4.
jen says:

I wonder what Miss Post would say about about my Ring GIRL. I’m also going for a pillow alternative. Perhaps a bed of flowers or a pomander with rings tied to it.

5.
JoJo says:

I also decided to throw ettiquite rules to the wind on this one. While my ring bearer will be 6 years old, my flower girl will be 9. Not only that, but my nephew (the ring bearer) will be carrying the rings in a baseball glove, a nod to my fiance’s ball playing days in college and general obsession. :)

6.
jen says:

Excuse me, I meant Ms. Post. :)

7.
Michele says:

I wanted to honor my brother who is 23. So he is our Lord of the Rings (yes my and fh are definitely geeks) and will be carrying our rings down the aisle prior to the rest of the party in a quiach (a traditional two handed bowl used for the first drink as husband and wife which is engraved with elvish script) SO I don’t think your 8 yearold ring bearer will be any big deal. . .lol

8.
Valerie says:

My ring bearer is 10! So don’t feel out of place. I love the ring-ring that you have, I think it’s very cute.

9.
Mrs Lily says:

The eldest of my flower girls was 8!

10.
aoedorothee says:

before the porcelain orb idea, i was going to have my ring bearer (a girl, btw) carry a gigantor fake ring that would be the size of a bangle with a giant fake stone on it. i thought it would be comical.

11.
Lucy says:

My flower girl will be 10.

12.
danielle says:

i used two small leather bibles (my husband’s and mine) and tied a ring on each with red ribbon.

13.
Katie says:

My ring bearer was 9 1/2 years old and it was just perfect. Don’t feel out of place at all and forget about Ms. Post age range. I love the pewter ring too!

14.
GG says:

My ring bearers are my brothers, ages 13 and 15. Those “rules” are silly. You can have who you want to what you want in YOUR wedding.

15.
JenniferB says:

My FH cousin asked if he could be our ring bearer. He will be 15 at our wedding. We said yes and thought it was awesome that he wanted to be part of our day so much, that he asked us!

16.
annieoakley says:

My flower girls are 3 - they are wearing v. cute flapper, garden style dresses with monkeys holding parasols. My ring bearer, also 3 - needed a monkey motif (the kids love the monkeys) - so instead of a ring pillow, which i think is just lame, I’m getting him a very hip sock monkey and we’ll tie the rings to that. That way, if he gets nervous, he’ll have his monkey with him - and hello! It’s a great gift for him to remember the day by. Go sock monkey! (Disclaimer: I’m getting married in Palm Springs at the Parker - v. sock monkey in style).

17.
Brandi says:

We are having our dog as our ring bearer and he will have a little box attached to a ribbon tied around his neck. Then, my FH’s two nephews (6 and 8) will be walking with him.

18.
Miss Petunia says:

JoJo: I love the idea of the rings in the baseball glove!

Michele: LOTR — it’s fabulous!

Danielle: I think using your Bibles was lovely AND meaningful! That’s a good one!

Everyone has such great variations!

19.
Firesong says:

I’m thinking of having our ring bearer carry the rings inside a cloisonne box — this one, in fact.


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Mrs. Petunia Mrs. Petunia, Ft. Lauderdale Age and Occupation: 31, College Professor Fiance's Age and Occupation: 29, Engineering Student/Part-time Barista Engagement Date: December 8, 2006 Wedding Date: March 2, 2008 Venue: Riverside Hotel Blogging Since: August 6, 2007 About Me: Our original idea of running off to get married quickly turned into an event with 100+ guests once other people got involved and I, too, got swept away in the lovely madness that is wedding planning. Mr. Petunia and I are obsessed with all things World of Warcraft, Monopoly, and Nintendo, so we’re planning on including some fun “game-y” details into our wedding.
 

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