Beehive

August 15th, 2007 @ 4:20 pm by Beehive

In today’s hive:

JennH is paying for her bm dresses (only $35 to custom-make), but she has to purchase her own fabric, which she’s afraid will be pricey for 5 girls. How does she go about asking her bm’s to pitch in if they don’t offer, as a lot of them haven’t been to weddings before. Any nontacky way to handle this?
Laura wants to know if it’s ok for her to match her shoes to the oyster colored sash around the waist of her dress, or should she get a pair that matches the diamond white color of the dress itself?
Impatience is considering eloping to Minnesota, but they have a 5 day waiting period for your license. They don’t have the time or money to fly up there twice or stay that long. Any ideas? She’s hoping to go at the end of September this year.
bobbi wants to know when bridesmaid luncheon invites should be sent out? Is it ok to send rehearsal dinner invites a few days after the wedding invites, and then the bm luncheon invites a week or two later?
Salley bought a Vera Wang, simple charmeuse gown with a tiny corset back that has long flowing ties. The whole dress is pretty flimy and flowy and she can’t seem to find any pictures for bustles for this kind of dress. Can you recommend something or point her to some pictures? Her friend recommends just doing a wrist loop and not worrying about a bustle. What do you think?
Ashley’s mermaid gown is pretty tight on top with boning. She’d still like to wear an undergarment that also keeps her tummy tucked in but doesn’t leave a mark visible where the corset ends and her thighs begin. Are there any undergarments that are lightweight and go down to your thighs? What are other brides wearing under their slim dresses?
N wants to know if the sticky chicken cutlet bras work for gals that are C’s and bigger? And which brands are best?

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18 Responses to “Beehive”

Guest

Andrea

Ashley - SPANX.

8/15/07 @ 4:21 pm (reply)

Guest

becky

Ashley (Andrea beat me to it.) SPANX are the greatest thing ever and were made to not “sausage” your chest or thighs where they stop. You will love them!

8/15/07 @ 4:23 pm (reply)

Guest

Impatience - Check and see if you can apply from afar…I know MD does that - you usually just have to go to your courthouse, get all the info certified and send it to MN…

good luck!

8/15/07 @ 4:26 pm (reply)

Guest

Miss Popcorn

N, my cousin’s a C cup and she wore one one of those under a very unstructured dress (ie, it stayed in place all by itself, no help from the dress) for her engagement party and she was quite happy with it.

I forget the brand, but it was just a random one from a department store.

8/15/07 @ 4:29 pm (reply)

Guest

Brooke

JennH- I’d word it something like this:

“I am so excited that we are having your dresses custom made — they will look wonderful! Some of the bridesmaid’s dresses out there go for $200 or more, and that is just too much to ask you all to pay.

Since we’re having the dresses made, I would really like to cover the dressmaker’s fees, as my gift to all of you. I was hoping that you wouldn’t mind paying for the fabric itself if I take care of everything else.”

8/15/07 @ 4:31 pm (reply)

Guest

KDN

To follow up on Ashley’s question - would you recommend the Higher Power Spanx?

8/15/07 @ 4:34 pm (reply)

Guest

scamps

Ashley - SPANX now has a new set of slimmers called “Slim Cognito” - they actually go high enough to clip onto your bra. They have them both in regular and thigh cut.

8/15/07 @ 4:40 pm (reply)

Guest

Spanx! My friend wore a very thin, almost nightgown-like wedding dress and she wore spanx. It did not show at all.

8/15/07 @ 4:55 pm (reply)

Guest

Mary

JennH, it depends. If you haven’t mentioned paying for the dresses at all, then Brooke’s suggestion seems appropriate. But I think that if you’ve already offered to pay for the dresses there is no way to backtrack and ask for contributions without making things awkward.

8/15/07 @ 5:11 pm (reply)

10.

Guest

Laura S

Laura - I think it would look fine either way.

8/15/07 @ 5:40 pm (reply)

11.

Guest

Linda

Salley, your dress is beautiful… perhaps a The Pick-Up Bustle - Ballroom Style would work. Here’s a site with a lot of different styles of bustles with photos to boot: http://www.leanna.com/Bridal/Bustles.htm

8/15/07 @ 5:47 pm (reply)

12.

Guest

Joyful2

Laura, get whatever shoes you want. Remember, it’s your day, so if you want to wear a certain color of shoe, then wear it.

8/15/07 @ 6:00 pm (reply)

13.

Guest

cubangirl

My friend is getting proposed to in Chicago this month and her boyfriend would like ideas: romantic restaurants/jazz clubs/places to take a walk. Any Chicago bees have any suggestions?

8/15/07 @ 6:05 pm (reply)

14.

Guest

Moi

JennH — My 2 cents: I would just treat them on the dress 100%, realizing that they are paying for the other BM expenses (shoes/accessories/hair/makeup you are requiring, not to mention travel, parties, showers, etc.), especially if you are “requiring” those extras.

If you ask them to pay for the fabric — If someone needs more fabric than someone else (because they are taller, bigger size, preggers, etc.), would you pro-rate or charge everyone equally? If you set a precedent of paying for part, it might seem like you are paying for part of everything else, too, which could get sticky.

Good luck!

8/15/07 @ 6:05 pm (reply)

15.

Guest

tofu

jennh - can the dresses be their thank you gifts as well (esp if its a dress they can wear again)? that way, you can pay for the whole thing and not worry about the expense of getting thank you gifts?

8/15/07 @ 7:17 pm (reply)

16.

Guest

aoedorothee

salley, i agree on the pick up bustle. that should work best for your dress.

8/16/07 @ 11:38 am (reply)

17.

Guest

~v~

My fiance and I are giving money to charity in honor of our guests (and having a candy buffet in lieu of favors). Are there any guidelines about what an appropriate donation would be? Thanks!

8/16/07 @ 12:30 pm (reply)

18.

Guest

Salley

Thanks, Linda and Aoedorothee!!

8/16/07 @ 8:03 pm (reply)