Wedding Blog
When we first started wedding planning, I knew from the get-go that choosing a photographer would be a problem. I’m always the one snapping away at friends’ weddings, and it makes me crazy that I’m doomed to spend our own wedding day without a camera in hand. And I’m very picky about photographers. I took a grad school class in Documentary Photography that taught us to view photos with a critical eye — interesting and fun, but something of a handicap when looking for a wedding photographer on a low budget!
After many sleepless nights reviewing online galleries, poring over Craigslist posts from inexpensive photographers, and reading discussion board threads about various options, last week I found The One. They say finding The One is like finding your perfect dress, or even your groom: “When it happens, you’ll know.” It was exactly like that for me — I was so overjoyed to find a great photographer within my price range, I actually cried.
But over the next few days, I started thinking about the real cost of her fee, and I’m seriously wavering. The money could buy a whole list of items we’ve been dreaming of for ages. As much as my heart yearns for beautiful photos of our big day, I just don’t know that we can justify that kind of expense. It doesn’t help that married friends all say after a while they never look at their wedding photos.
I still believe my photographer is The One and that she’s more than worth her fees in relation to the wedding market. If it’s a question of which photographer to hire, there’s no question. But we’re not sure it’s a question of “which,” but of “whether”….
We see 3 options:
1. Skip the pro. Use family and friends. This has to produce at least a passable record of the day. I took the 3 photos featured here at friends’ weddings, and 2 of them with the very basic manual camera I got when I was 15. With all the fancy, high-megapixel, zoom-lens, point-and-shoot digitals everyone is sporting these days, we’ve got to get at least a few good shots, right?
2. Hire a different, cheaper pro. But what worries me most is that the photos won’t meet my high standards and I’ll cringe every time I look at them.
3. Go with the family/friend option for the big day, but hire “The One” for an engagement or trash-the-dress type session so that we have at least a few fancy photos to mark the event. She’s willing to do this for about 1/4 the price of a full wedding shoot. And we’re leaning this way. But should we just suck it up and pay the whole thing for the whole wedding?
Does anyone have advice for us? Has anyone else made a choice to skip the photos, or found a creative way to approach the issue? (Thanks!!)
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Mmmm. I am a graphic designer and my fiance is a photograher (wildlife). I shoed him some pretty nice photograhy the other day and all he could see were the flaws–out of focus here, too much contrast there. And once he pointed it out, I couldn’t see the photo for the errors either. If you are like that, go for a good pro–maybe just for the ceremony and part of the reception? A little less pricey, but you’ll be confident in getting some good shots. Photography is more than just having a good camera–these guys earn their living I think.
The photography was one of the most expensive things I picked out. (And it’s pretty budget friendly compared to what other people I’ve heard have paid). To heck with flowers…even my dress was a fraction of the cost. But it was important for me to have tons of great pcitures. I may never look as pretty ever again!
I think I would skip option 1 or 3– your wedding day is one of the most important days of your life. You want it to be documented well and leaving it up to chance by having friends or family photograph it seems risky to me.
I tossed and turned forever about choosing a wedding photographer bc of how expensive it was and everyone I loved was so costly. In the end, I ended up going with a midrange photographer. I’m happy with my choice. I say either go ahead and book the photographer you would love (I would guess few ppl regret the decision to splurge on photography) or find someone you like who is a little bit less.
For me I spend a lot on things that are heirlooms for our kids: dress, veil, rings, photographs. The rest is important, but fleeting…
We went through a similar process, and I am VERY happy with what we ultimately chose. At first we were thinking we wouldn’t hire any pro photographer because we have a fair number of very good amateurs that were going to be coming to the wedding anyway; then decided we HAD to have a pro, but all the ones I liked were way too expensive; then found The One, who was affordable (although still quite a bit above what we were “hoping” to pay). In the end, we splurged a bit and got The One (Jane Heller! She rocks!) and seriously I am sooooooooooo glad that we did!!!! A couple of our friends got some really fantastic shots, but most of them have someone standing up front, or some other little “doesn’t quite look pro” touch because they didn’t want to get in the way of other people (which is nice, but just means they don’t have as good access as a designated official photographer would be willing to take). But aside from that her photos are just gorgeous and, it may just be me, haha, but I really do look at at least a couple of them every single day and i’m approaching 3 months since the wedding now. 
I’m sure I won’t keep it up forever, but knowing that we have these perfect gorgeous photos is really really deeply satisfying, for whatever that’s worth! So I obviously say - since you said she was within your price range, even if still a lot of money - go for it!!! I think people who really care about photography really DO care about whether a picture just keeps a record of the day or perfectly captures the moment. Okay this is long, but that’s my 2 cents!
Hi Miss Tulip,
I’m from the MD area, so I’ll help as much as I can. I’m on a budget, too, but photos are the most important to me next to my [numerous] change of dresses on the wedding day. So far, I’ve looked into different photographers and these are affordable for our budget. We went with J. Stuart Harris, whom we met at a bridal event. My friend went with Anne Lord, and she was soooooooo nice. She even brought 2 assistants to capture all the shots.
Both had excellent personalities and was willing to accomodate the couple.
I’ve looked into
http://www.annelordphotography.com/EOP_Content.aspx?Menu=51
Try them.
I agree so much with maverika! And when I plan I’m always keeping my dad’s motto in mind: If you’re going to do it, do it right, do it once, and don’t have any regrets! Can’t go back and recreate the moment again, so let a fabulous photographer capture it right! It’ll take lots of research, but I just know you’ll find the *one* in budget like we did! Good luck!
I found The One–completely out of my price range and 6 states away as a matter of fact. After a few email exchanges with her, she gave some great advice which I will share with you. Use craigslist to find someone in your range and once you narrow it down, they should show you any publications they have done, a full set of proofs, you should contact several references and you should click with them …they will be in your face as well as families all day!! I was very particular about having a photo-journalist style photographer so I cross referenced the craigslist photographers with the WPJA site to find a qualified person. I’m extremely happy with my choice both for quality of work and affordabliity.
Just as a side note from a bride who was married on Sunday— don’t count too heavily on friends and family. Things happen (like they get so wrapped up in the emotion they forget to shot it) so have a professional whose job it is to capture the moments. Good luck!!
I went through the same dilemma. What we settled on was going with the awesome photographer but making sure the contract gave us the rights to all digital negatives. So we invested in the photography service (which we could not DIY) and saved in the processing/album service (which we can do a lot of DIY, with amazing variables, great competition, online, thanks to digital photography). When negotiating, don’t tell the photographer you aren’t buying any of their processing or they might jack the day-of cost!
Whatever happened to the good old days when the couple went to a studio for one or two magnificent photos and then enjoyed their wedding day with friends & family taking the occasional candid snapshot. We do treasure those studio portraits of the older generation.
For what it’s worth, our #1 favorite photo of the day was taken by a relative (free!) with an awesome camera. Lucky shot?
Hands down one of the most common regrets I’ve heard from former brides is that they didn’t get a good photographer.
The photos are one of the very few purchases that will last beyond the wedding day. As the years go by your memory will get fuzzy and it will be a shame to lose record of all those lovely little details that you’ve been putting so much time and money into. And maybe you won’t pour over those albums immediately while everything is fresh, but I really think you’ll appreciate having them later.
I really think this is one of the areas where you shouldn’t be afraid to spend to get what you want - get your dress on ebay, make your own invitations, use silk flowers, have a mid-afternoon cake and punch instead of a later four course dinner, scrap the favors and out of town baskets, but please hire a professional photographer that you love!
If you think you’ll cringe looking at a cheaper pro, I think you’ll cringe looking at what non-professional family and friends do. Sure sometimes it works out, but if you have a discerning eye…
Please please please don’t go without a pro photographer on your wedding day. My insides kind of hurt at the mere thought of you not having a cohesive unit of photos from the day! Maybe some people don’t look at their wedding photos that often, but what about 20 years from now when their kids want to know what their parents’ wedding day was like? I feel like then, they will really be glad that they spent the money and did it right to have professional shots.
I think what Mrs. Bluebell said hit the nail on the head — friends may capture some great moments, but the difference between pro and amateur photos will always show…. for someone like you who has a critical eye for photography, I think you will regret not having professional shots of your day.
I had a very similar problem, but then a friend of mine said something to me that made me throw caution to the wind and just go with “The One.” She said, there are only two things that are last after your wedding — the husband and pictures! So make sure you have a good husband and good pictures.
I think you will regret it if you skimp on the pictures.
My vote goes for splurging on photos and saving on other stuff, too. You can’t rely on your guests to take pictures– after all, you want them to be crying during your ceremony, and partying during the reception, not trying to line up that perfect shot! You’ll never get the beautiful closeups and great lighting that you would with a professional.
I think you could also get The One for a post-wedding shoot, and hire someone cheaper for the day of. My husband and I loved a photojournalist but were concerned we wouldn’t get any artsy posed shots of us in our finery. So we hired him for the day of and got another photographer for a pre-wedding shoot earlier in the week! Best of both worlds…
If you want to continue your search, I started on craigslist. I put up an ad looking for students and pro’s who are trying to get into the wedding market. Some have done a few weddings but want more experience.
I have gotten over 100 responses and seen some amazing photographs.
I sent out a second email, explaining all that and asking for prices of just an engagement shoot and availability. Most of the responses have given me oppurtunity to have free engagement shoots or ones at deeply discounted rates.
Most of them are willing to do the TTD session for free for experience. Some of them with experience already.
Basically, if I am willing to let them use my photos, I get it all for free.
See more in my blog:
xing5683.wordpress.com
it seems that photography is quite important to you. i’d probably splurge in that one area, if nothing else. i’d say go with “the one” or option #2. perhaps you could shorten the time of photography to lessen the package. does she have an option to just document the ceremony and bridal portraits, plus maybe one hour of the reception?
Well Miss Tulip… let me start by saying that I too am VERY picky about photography. I also thought about some of those same options. In the end I decided it would be worth it to up the budget for photography and cut back in other places.
IT WAS THE SINGLE BEST DECISION THAT I MADE ABOUT MY WEDDING!!! I can’t emphasize that enough.
As far as hoping that family/friends will get good shots… don’t count on it. Most of the shots we got from friends/family were no where NEAR the quality of our pro shots. Plus, he was there to capture things they wouldn’t have.
Many, many things in our wedding went wrong, and if it wasn’t for the gorgeous photos that I have to remember the few things that went right I would be soooo disappointed. And by the way, I really don’t remember much clearly… the day went by so fast and it’s all a blur.
As far as getting a cheaper photographer, I wouldn’t go too cheap. Othewise, what’s the point, KWIM?
Here is my post about deciding on a photographer, it might help: http://www.weddingbee.com/2007/07/02/radish-a-picture-is-worth-a-thousand-dollars/
Also, if you want, you can look at my Flickr photo group. It has some pictures from family/friends and some from our pro photog (forbes creative is the username). I think it clearly highlights the difference in pro/non pro. I’ll send you the link in a message.
Anyway, that’s my 2 cents. I really think you’ll regret it if you skip on good pro pics.
I think that, like all wedding choices, you’ll utimately go with your gut. For me, though, the photographer is the most important vendor. I love photography, I scrapbook, I take pictures all the time, and I am more than willing to spend less in other areas (like, waaaay less) to have a photographer that I love.
Also - the people you have talked to may not look at their wedding photos a lot, but it sort of sounds like you love photography and YOU will. Also - personally, I *love* looking at family members’ wedding albums. Seeing the whole family together, in group shots and candids, over several generations - it’s so fun. I hope I have a great wedding album that my imaginary future children will love!
In response to a completely separate part of your post, I say you CAN take pictures at your own wedding. I took a few shots before the guests arrived, and a few during the reception, and yeah, I got yelled at (”you’re not supposed to be taking pictures!” “Yeah? Why not?” “Uh…because!”), but forget them. I love the fact that these few pictures are from my exact point of view.
I totally agree with MissBlushing. You may not look at the wedding photos everyday now. But in the years to come, they are one of the only pieces left of your day. I would definitely splurge. I was in a similar situation with a good photographer with a good price and an even better photographer with a high price (3K more than the other)… my FI convinced me to go with the best photographer. So I’m biased, but I say splurge.
Hmm, sometimes it takes me a while, but I do think I’m starting to sense some sort of a trend in the responses….?
For a day or so I felt good about deciding “no”, but then I started to really miss the idea of pretty pictures. But it’s so hard to know the difference between what the bridal industry talks you into and what really does matter, you know? Your responses are really helpful in that respect.
There have been too many helpful suggestions to single out for thanks, so just want to say an overall THANKS to everyone who has offered up ideas so far. They’ve been great!!
you’ve got a ton of great reasons above already, so i won’t repeat except to say, get a professional photographer. i fully concur with what everyone above has said. it’ll be nice to have those extra ones from the family, but you’ll want those special pictures from the professional. engagement or trash the dress or day after the wedding pics simply won’t capture the emotion of the actual day of. good luck!
It’s not just the quality of the images that is important. A pro photographer strives to tell the story of your entire day through photographs. I’d bet a million bucks your guests do not have the trained eye, the foresight, or correct equipment to capture moments, emotions and events, put them all together and have a cohesive collection of images to tell the story of your day. I mean, guests might get a few nice shots here and there, but they’ll never come together as a whole to depict the day. Don’t get me wrong, I know the enormous amount of money some of the pros cost, but in the end I think a good one is worth every penny. It takes more than a camera to make someone a photographer.
OK, more thoughts:
1. Sooner or later, I will share my photog with you all! I’m a bit reluctant right now, in part because it’s like a new relationship and I’m still feeling a little shy about introducing The One to my friends. 
2. It’s always a little weird talking about money, but it’s easiest to know details, so: Her fee would be $1,750 for the entire day. We would get all the images on DVD. The fee includes an engagement shoot. I’ve seen enough to be comfortable that this is a great price to pay for a photographer I love.
The weird part is that we’re leaning toward holding the reception in a place with no site fee, which means that our reception costs would probably top out around $2,500. (Yay!!!!!) So even though the cost is reasonable for wedding photography, we freak out every time we think of paying 70% as much for photography as we would for the entire reception!
3. But I have the savings. Mr. T sort of thinks hiring the full package would be crazy. But he knows photography is my big fetish, and it would still technically come out of “my” coffers, so he won’t freak out if we hire her. (My parents would think I was nuts, but it wouldn’t be the first time! His parents would love it.)
ABSOLUTELY go for THE ONE!
Yeah, it seems crazy to pay such a large fee when you compare it to your other costs, but it is not a bad price, considering what you are getting. And, yes, you should definitely talk to her to see what options are out there — if she could reduce the price by not providing an album (those are very costly); if she is one who’s not willing to provide digi-negs, maybe she’d be willing to upload your selected shots to a place like MyPublisher or Blurb, etc. so you can have a printed album that is less expensive?
Don’t rely on friends and family. You will regret it. I also think that if you get a cheaper photog, you will still probably be sad. The one that got away, y’know? And, to me, there’s no sense in paying 2/3 the price to get 1/2 the satisfaction. It’s STILL a lot of money, and you will not be overjoyed the way you will if you get THE ONE.
In theory, #3 sounds like a good idea, but you might end up paying equally as much when you add everything up. (Fee for The One + Fee for cheaper photog + albums, etc.)
i would say, with your critical eye, to stay with your present photographer. photography/videography is a HUGE deal for me so when the bf and i get married, i’m pushing for those two things. that said, as much as i love my family and friends, some of whom take good pictures, i refuse to trust them with something that is this important to me, especially since i KNOW for a fact that i’m very picky and if i find a flaw, i won’t be happy. this is why i haven’t watched my own college graduation video [you don't see me cross the stage, which is the entire point, because my sister - bless her heart - was too excited and started clapping...while holding the camera!].
go with your gut and stay with your photog. you won’t regret it.
pics on dvd? so will you get the full image files or just all of the pics on a dvd slideshow? make sure you do get all of the full image files. but girl, $1750 is a fabulous deal for the whole day AND an engagement session! fabulous i tell you fabulous! hehe!
I am currently paying off the cost of my photog. I knew that I needed to have a good pictures. With all that you are spending - why let any of it go to waste with amateur pics. It is an investment.
I recently found my parents album- and I cherish it. So you may not look at them, but your kids will.
And you are blogging about your wedding- so obviously you are way involved with every aspect of it.
I say- skip some of the frills and get the full day.
on a side note- my father in law is a wedding photog and took some some pics with a point and shoot- the style is good- but the quality can not compare to the pros- and he is a pro!
Whoa! $1750 is CHEAP for a photographer that you love that much plus you get the digital negatives.
Go for it!
Do what you need to do to be able to sleep soundly at night.
Get the photographer you love. I picked a photographer whose work I loved, but who I didn’t get to know very well, and who ultimately didn’t get the detail shots I wanted…and didn’t do an album….and didn’t do much in the way of processing the images. I liked our pictures, but I keep wondering how it might have been different if I had listened to my gut in the months leading up to the wedding when I was considering breaking the contract and hiring someone else (who I loved, clicked with, admired, coveted, etc…). I find my photos are simply adequate. I’d say 5-10 are great images, but there are a lot of things I know he didn’t capture, and that makes me a bit sad.
i say go for it! if anything, you can try asking her for her rate without the engagement shoot. i couldn’t imagine having a wedding without a photographer i loved. your friends and loved ones will be there to celebrate, and they will definitely take pictures, and yes, you’ll get some good shots, but there is no substitute for someone who’s aim is to capture everything that you are not able to see. even though you’ll tuck them away after the wedding and may not see them again, i’m sure you won’t regret having the pictures by your side.
As a bride who didn’t pick her ideal photographer and went with a non-pro, I must say that I really regretted not sucking it up and paying the extra $1k or whatever to get the One. I would tell you to go ahead and splurge on the photographer you want. Cut back in other areas if you have to, but definitely spend on the One. Every time I think about my pictures, I cringe a little because there were moments that were important to me but weren’t captured on film (or were captured in such a way that you can barely tell what is going on). Don’t make this mistake.
I’m not sure what your budget is like, but I started out doing wedding photography for friends in your position. Right now I have an all inclusive package for $1500 and with travel it would probibly still be under $2000 if you are interested. Feel free to drop me a line and check out my website…I hope your dilemma gets cleared! =)
http://www.blair-photography.com
Ms. Tulip,
Let me tell you that all of the ladies here are giving you lots of good advice. As a D.C. wedding photographer myself (and a D.C. bride-to-be), I can’t stress to you how important it is to hire a professional. There are so many things that go into layering together elements of your wedding to tell the story of your day that your guests are totally incapable of doing. A great wedding photographer has to make split second decisions about composition & timing, understanding light and how to add or subtract it from a scene or subject as well as a million other things. Not to mention the quality of the images themselves. Nothing makes me cringe more than images shot with a point-and-shoot and direct flash and it sounds to me that you are the same way. Go with your gut and book the ONE. In D.C. I’d say that anything under $3000 is a great deal if you love their work.
Best of luck to you!
Beautiful photos that help you remember the emotions of the day are worth it, worth it, worth it. We nearly doubled our photography budget to get someone whose work we loved (and once we found out the going rate in the area where we got married), and I have zero regrets about that. I do look at our photos embarrassingly often, even though the wedding was 2 years ago. My mom has virtually no photos from her first wedding since she was relying on a brother-in-law who was supposed to know what he was doing, but none of the pictures came out. Even though she and my father are divorced, she’s still annoyed about having only polaroids from that wedding that other guests happened to send. From where I sit, it’s a worthwhile investment.
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Mrs. Tulip, DC
Age and Occupation: 36, Retired
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 33, Counsel/DOO for Small Gov't Contractor
Engagement Date: August 8, 2007
Wedding Date: March, 2008
Venue: Still Looking!
About Me: In all my dreams of the man I'd someday marry, I never pictured anyone as perfect for me as Mr. Tulip. So now we just have to make it through the craziness of the wedding and the moving in together! I love crafts, sewing, jewelry making, and photography, so am looking forward to this chance for DIY fun. When not wedding planning, I'm playing with our dog and 4 cats, Ebay shopping, or watching too much TV (often simultaneously!).
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