It’s a sensitive subject - but this is something that all girls have to think about before their wedding. The BC.
BC stands for two things for me, both of which are pretty much destroyers of my happiness.
1) Bloody C*nt. (thanks to a friend, who calls it this and I thought it was fitting)
Ok, so graphic and disgusting, but if we’re out and I’m feeling particularly crappy, I can turn to Mr. Gummi Bear and say I’m having “the BC” then I’m not telling the world “Hey everyone!!! I’m menstruating like crazy over here!!!!!”
I get mad pms bloating for about a week before my friend visits me, I gain about 1.5 inches all over and feel just disgusting until after it’s all over. I also get happy cramps that make me cry naked on the bathroom floor. Always naked, I don’t know, it just happens - my stomach cramps and my clothes all disintegrate. On top of this, I’m irregular.
2) Birth Control.
I’m the kind of person who gets every possible symptom of any medication you take - if it says you may gain weight, within 24 hours I’m retaining 50 gallons of water and feeling like my pants are going to rip. Vomiting? Hell yea! Anything that CAN go wrong, will, so I can’t take any birth control. It makes me emotional, nauseous, sickly, and makes me gain 15 lbs within the first month and then 5 lbs every month after. Imagine my dismay after 6 months of being on birth control and going up 2 pants sizes in college.
Now, since I’m irregular, I’m either going to be PMSing or on my period during my wedding. I thought “ok, I can handle this” at first, but I’m realizing that if I’m 1.5 inches larger in my dress than planned, it’s just not going to fit. So I had to decide - hope and pray that all my years of experience and months of going through this were wrong and I’d have a wonderful happy awesome non sickening weight gaining period… or risk getting on BC for one week and push it off.
I chose the latter. So today, I popped in a nuvaring and will be waiting for one week to try and keep the BC at bay just long enough to push it until a week or two after the wedding.
Is there anything anyone can recommend for trying to keep my body normal during this week and maybe help me flush any extra chemicals after I take it out? What do other girls do? Is there anything other than drinking a pool’s worth of water that might help me get rid of some of this water retention and super-bloat?
Miss GB, has your OBGYN ever recommended anything to you? I’ve continuously switched BC to find the perfect one and I think I finally have! I’m currently on Yaz and it works great, the actual period itself is about one day, and the other 2-3 days it’s just a light flow, with this, comes the lighter cramps!
Also Midol works great, it gets rid of cramps, backache, bloating, AND the i want to sleep all freaking week feeling you get.
As for the mood swings, i still feel it once in awhile, but it’s definitely not as bad as it was when I was on the patch.
Oh yeah, i heard exercise helps w/ everything as well, but i haven’t tried that yet.
Good luck!
Miss Gummi Bear, you sound just like me with the BC. I had to go off of it after just a couple months because it made me so depressed, moody, sick, etc. I’ll be curious to see if there are any helpful comments from the readers! Good luck!
I never had good luck with birth control until I tried the Nuvaring - a plastic ring with hormones on it. You put it up inside of you like a tampon - but it stays in for 3 weeks. You take it out for a week and get your period.
Rinse. Repeat.
The hormones are delivered more “directly” to the organs that are affected by them, perhaps bypassing some of the systemic side-effects you’ve experienced in the past. I’m not a health professional at all - I just LOVE the way the ring works and doesn’t interfere with my daily life. HIGHLY Recommended!
I was on a pill version of birth control three times…and each time had to go off for various reasons…I could be on the ring for as long as I need to be. Run, do not walk, to the OBGYN for this.
eww. sorry. haha.. but indeed, very graphic.
but i have to admit, when i first heard your definition of BC, i was thinking about the blood when virgins have sex for the first time.
as dysha pointed out, you may have to try several different kinds of birth control before you find the right one for you.
also, for period cramps, motrin or aleve is usually more effective. midol is basically tylenol with caffeine and good marketing. if you were able to predict when your period comes, you could just start taking the ibuprofen/aleve a few days prior to help minimize the pain.
good luck!
I was on the pill for over 10 years, and just recently switched to nuvaring. Overall I like it and it does reduce the side effects- it’s not as strong and I don’t get as nauseous.
But I’m in your same boat Ms. Gummi Bear, and actually went off the ring for 2 weeks to get my cycle on the right timing for my wedding. Yesterday I put it back in, and was throwing up during the night. Ugh.
Hang in there!
1) Talk to your dcctor - there are so many options that *something* will probably work for you.
2) For me, I’ve found that exercising hard for several days just before getting my period keeps the swelling / weight gain minimal. My personal theory is that I flush all the water out consistently by sweating, so it doesn’t have a chance to embed itself wherever it is that it normally goes.
I’ve had the Mirena IUD for 2 years now. It lets off less hormones/chemicals on a day-to-day basis than even the Nuvaring. I don’t even have monthly visits anymore - a little at first but it leveled off after six months. Still have some of the cramping on a minor level but no monthly visits.
While BC pills are usually covered by insurance, the IUD was not. $500 sounds steep but it’s been worth it.
I’ll echo what other bees have said already — talk to your doctor about trying out different options until you find the one that works for you, that doesn’t leave you bloaty and crampy and just a very unhappy Ms. Bear.
Good luck!!
I second the Mirena IUD. Until recently, the FDA would not allow women without children to have one, but that has thinkfully changed. Basically, it’s a little T shaped thing that is implanted into the lining of your uterus. There’s a tiny string (not even as thick/long as a tampon string) that hangs out, but you can barely feel it.
I’ve had it for about a year and LOVE it. I have an extremely light flow and it generally lasts for all of 4 days. I do have minor cramping, but it’s nothing I can’t handle with a few ibuprofens. One of the best things about it is something like 98% effective. We don’t use anything other protection and have had no issues at all!
Oh, and unlike Christine, my insurance covered all but about $100. It’s definitely worth checking into!
I too have the same problems with Birth Control and ran into the “issue” of my period coming while on my honeymoon- or day of the wedding. I talked with my OB/Gyn about some different options and decided to try Nuvaring. I have had some really positive results over the past 2 months (I’m starting month 3) and have not felt any of the normal side effects. While I have no “good” advice to offer- I wish you the same luck I am having!
Doctor: hormones: you not having BC on the day.
me? i got it the day of. & i mean GOT IT. not light or anything. my mother came to our site with midol, those 1 use heating pads, enormous pads (seriously, i could have slept on them), and the biggest, scariest tampons i have ever seen.
What did I wish for? hormones.
MY doctor offered me a prescription for progesterone instead of BC (i can’t take that). But I was nuts and said no. stupid me.
Contact your doctor and ask about getting a diuretic. Another option is to take 100mg of B6, which is a natural diuretic, daily. Don’t take more than that though, as if you take too much — like anything else — it isn’t good for you.
I was another one that altered my cycle so that it wouldn’t fall on my wedding day or honeymoon. I gain weight too, so I made sure my fitting was 4 weeks earlier to make sure I was in the same “size” as I would be on that day.
I adjusted my cycle as soon as we picked a date, but I’m one of the lucky ones that doesn’t get pill side effects. I do have a thought for the water retention though: Bikram Yoga - you’ve never sweat so much in your life. It’s an hour an a half of 26 poses done in a room that’s kept at 105 degree’s. It’ll ring you out like a towel. I’ve been doing it for about a month and I love it. BikramYoga.com has a studio finder (7 in SF!), and a lot of places give you a free trial week.
I echo Melissa on the water retention thing- working out and sweating a bundle is one of the only things that helps me. I HATE working out, but it’s worth it for the energy boost it gives me when I’m all pms-y and want to die. Also, the NuvaRing is awesome- no side effects at all. I used the pill for awhile and hated every one I tried, but the NuvaRing has worked for the last four years. Can’t say enough about it!
I know what you mean about side effects, but you might want to give the Nuvaring a fair shot. It’s lower-dose than many pills and bypasses your digestive system, so people tend to suffer fewer side effects overall.
A further trick with Nuvaring (or ANY steady-dose hormonal method) is to use it to skip your period entirely during the wedding or honeymoon. Just ignore the “week off” and jump right back in with a new ring (or new pack of pills) after 3 weeks instead of 4. The hormones will keep your period at bay. You will probably have some spotting, but it’s much better than a full-on period. Especially if you suffer major symptoms.
I used to suffer menstrual migraines, agonizing cramps and cry-for-2-days PMS depression, so my OB/GYN explained the Nuvaring trick to me. She doesn’t believe menstruation is medically necessary at all and said the current pill regimes build in the period week just because women are used to having periods. (And in fact it was a bit nerve-wracking to think of “messing with nature” to stop them, till I decided women used to spend most of their lives pregnant so probably monthly periods aren’t how nature intended things anyway….) The FDA recently approved a new pill that allows you to skip periods for a year, but you can do it with any steady-dose method, including Nuvaring. I haven’t had a period in 2 years (TMI?), and it has completely saved my life!!!
I have tried this before, it works strangely, but you might want to try it. About a week and a half before your period (or the wedding, perhaps?), take 2 ibuprofen a day. For me, it lessens my period by a few days. However, it can throw off your cycle. I’m not quite sure how it works, but I’ve used it on vacations before I was on the pill. I’m not sure how it will work in conjunction to the pill, but it may be worth trying if BC makes you really feel awful.
I definitely had to try a few different options when it came to the BC. I hated the patch, didn’t like Yaz b/c it made me gain way too much weight. Now I’m on Seasonale/Seasonique and LOVE it. Only having a cycle 4 times a year is glorious.
Get thee to Whole Foods for Dandelion Root. Not Leaves, the root. You can get it in liquid form and you put 30 drops in warm water three times a day.
It is the ONLY thing I can do for my god awful bloating and it works after one day at least.
Be forewarned however, you will pee like you just drank a keg so no long car rides or flights while on it. 
Got a Paragard IUD. Do not drink soda and stay away from salt in general, but especially around your period. Take a diuretic too.
My biggest fear is getting it on my wedding day. Since I am highly irregular (only 4-5 times per year) and not able to take any hormonal BC I have no idea when it may decide to show up. It seems to know when the worst possible times to start will be, and then it decides to arrive. You know - when I go on vacation, when I have an important presentation at work, when I decide to wear light colored pants.
I’m envisioning that scene from Sixteen Candles where Samantha’s older sister Ginny gets her period on her wedding day and pumps herself full of muscle relaxers only to get completely sloppy during the ceremony. Oh, I hope that’s not me.
I love Nuvaring, all my gfs are now on it - i think out of all the other options for bc - I’ve tried pills & patch - I had fewer side effects with the ring when it came to weight, mood swings & my period is lighter.
Hi Miss GB!
Well, I am a medical professional ( I am an Women’s Health Nurse Practitioner), and I must say, I think you need to talk to your practitioner to discuss your options. You shoudn’t be suffering so much with your menstrual cycle…..There are SO MANY low-dose bc formulations on the market right now that we are finding patients are doing very well with…e.g. Nuvaring, Yaz, Loestrin, etc.
When it comes to birth control, it really comes down to trial and error- find a formulation that works for you, and make sure that after you start it, you stick with it for at least 3 months. By that time, most side effects will go away….
Best of luck, and keep us updated!
-Dani
I know this is gong to sound crazy, but you should try (and maybe it’s too late, but you should try it at some point, anyway) Chaste Tree Berry. You can find it at a health food store, or natural store. It’s an herb (I believe) and I took it as a teenager to regulate my extremely irregular menstrual cycle. It worked!! Obviously, it’s not birth control, but it will take care of your irregularity, and in some people helps with cramps, moodiness, acne, etc.
If you’re already on the NuvaRing, see if it will keep you from getting PMS-y. Hopefully it will–I have no PMS anymore, but then I use the NuvaRing to suppress my periods. I don’t do the three week “trick,” which is the same as the pill trick, I leave it in for four weeks and then just put in a new one. I do this because I was getting agonizing menstrual migraines. Now I don’t get the migraines, and don’t get periods, either.
Other ways to keep off water weight: no salt, and avoid carbs–I forget how much, exactly, but every gram of carbohydrate you eat makes you retain a certain amount of water. If you avoid carbs for the days before your wedding, you may be very impressed by the results Sweating through exercise is always good–if nothing else, it will relax you before the wedding! There are OTC diuretics on the market, and prescription ones too, but that seems a bit extreme. And please don’t take herbs recommended over the internet–you never know what the side effects are going to be, especially if you’re taking prescription drugs.
Good luck!
Miss Gummi Bear - I just wanted to let you know that I had a stroke (blood clot in the vein surrounding my brain) while taking the Nuva Ring last year. I was 28 years old at the time and my Neurologist believes the clot was caused from the ring. So, be careful.
I got married last weekend, and yes, my Aunt Flo was in attendance
I second the Roasted Dandelion Root Tea. That, plus if you don’t already drink 10 cups of water a day, start that habit (having to pee every 15 minutes starts to diminish after a week or so if you’re consistent about it.) The combo of the tea and the water really help with the bloating. Also, I drink little or no coffee before my period and avoid most other sources of caffeine.
Mrs. Gummi Bear, San Francisco
Age and Occupation: 25, Japanese Importer/Illustrator
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 24, Game Developer/Programmer
Engagement Date: April 15, 2006
Wedding Date: October 13, 2007
Blogging Since: June 19, 2007
Venue: Organic farm an hour from San Francisco
About Me: I live for anthropologie, design blogs, sweets, japanese zakka, and vintage goods. We just bought our first home together and live with our two puppies and cat - it's a strange mixture of vintage, high-tech (we have 7 computers and 21 video game systems in all), and a whole lot of fur. Our wedding tries to embody the Japanese idea of "slow life", which is truly taking the time to enjoy food, company, and your environment!
Poor thing - I also gained 2 pant sizes in college, but decided to stick with the BC and have leveled out since.
As far as advice? Stay away from salty food and dairy. Pray for a miracle??