If I could afford to pay for all my bridesmaids’ dresses, I would. An especially heart wrenching moment for me was when Mr. Penguin’s mom was asking Mr. Penguin’s sister what she wanted for her birthday, and she asked her mom if she would help pay for the $300 Vera Wang Bridesmaid Dress she was going to wear in an upcoming wedding.
A bridesmaid dress for her birthday? I almost passed out right then and there. Needless to say, Mr. Penguin and I will be buying his sister’s dress for our wedding. She’s a graduate student on loans, and…well, enough said.
My parents aren’t paying for my dress, and the added cost of having to pay for maids’ dresses as well would probably knock me over dead. Fortunately, custom dictates that its perfectly acceptable for your maids to pay for their own dresses. But this doesn’t mean I haven’t lost sleep over it. I set a budget of under $200 (including a reasonable tailoring cost) which meant that dresses over $150 were out of the question.
My favorite casual dress designer is Ella Moss. Ella Moss dresses are typically cotton, and they usually retail for around $160. Her dresses usually come in a variety of colors, perfect for a casual bridesmaid. The “re-wear ability” factor is very high. The best part about a cotton/jersey knit dress is that it usually doesn’t need hemming/tailoring. Here are a few from the Ella Moss Website:
Another great option for solid colored dresses are Velvet by Graham and Spencer. Their knit dresses are also very re-wearable. Here are some Velvet dresses from Anthropologie.com:
From top left: $118, $178, $118. $118
I figured that since we’ll be outside in June, something similar should work just fine, however, my wedding-savvy bridesmaid vetoed them, saying they might look a bit too informal next to my dress. Oh well. You can’t say I didn’t try.
How are you trying to cut your Bridesmaids costs?
I completely feel you on this. My Maid of Honour is in grad school and Mr. Hummingbird’s Best Lady is not only in school (she just started her first year of midwifery school) but has two young kids, so the idea of having them spend a bunch of money on a dress seemed totally unfair.
Thankfully, I managed to find a seamstress who is able to replicate a style I like for a relatively inexpensive price. I am hoping that after I buy the fabric, the labour costs will be reasonable enough that it won’t be a financial burden on anyone.
I liked the bridesmaid dress my sister had recently worn in a friend’s wedding, so I had her re-wear it, and then had the other sister get something that went with it.
Seriously, for those who have been a BM in a bunch of recent weddings, see if any of them already has something appropriate that is re-wearable.
I only had a Maid of Honor, so that saved money for all involved. Then we went dress shopping and I pictched in for the rest of the “perfect” dress after a certain dollar amount. I think it was after $100.00. I thought that was fair since she wouldn’t have bought it for herself if there wasn’t a wedding. She ended up paying for tailoring costs since it fit perfectly at the time we bought it. I also didn’t care what shoes, jewelry, hair, makeup she had since I liked her personal style. Besides everyone would be looking at me 
I totally agree with you. Cost and re-wearability (gotta love that) were high on my list. I picked out little black dresses from nordstrom.com for my BMs. They were all very happy with the style and price tage: $118 + $5 shipping to your door. No need for fittings or alterations in a store. I don’t think it can get any more painless than that. 
We let all our BMs picke their own dresses - all in black. Honestly it totally stressed me out but in the end they looked AMAZING - and SO much better than if we had dressed them.
Try the outlet stores. I went to the Jessica McClintock outlet in SF during their holiday weekend half off sale and lucked out with finding my color ($35 each) the second time I visited. I actually bought the dresses without them trying it on and bought them larger than their street size. I was able to then go back and look at their cheap rack of ‘ruined’ dresses (partial damage) and find 2 dresses of the same color to use as matching fabric for jr. bridesmaids dresses for $7 each.
I’m not trying to be rude, it just seems to me that since most of us already spend so much money on our weddings- why not pay for the bridesmaid dresses if you feel that they will have difficulty affording it?
I chose the option of getting my bridesmaids a cheap dress that I liked and could afford, instead of having them pay for their own dresses. In the grand scheme of the wedding, it’s a very small cost.
With that said, I also want to point out that I am having a low-cost wedding since me and my fiance are paying for it by ourselves.
I have about 1000 worth of BM dresses in my closet that I will never wear. By the time I bought the dress, the shoes, got my hair and make up, all the pitching in of parties before the wedding and then the wedding gift. I was averaging at least $500 - $600 per wedding.
I decided for my BM’s I wouldn’t do that to them so I looked high and low for affordable dresses. I finally remembered the Jessica McClintock outlet in SF and I found their dresses there for $40.00 each. They are deep chocolate brown beautiful dresses that I later saw at Macy’s for $130.00!!!!
i agree with #7. I am paying for my bridesmaids’ dresses b/c they are in MY wedding party so I felt it was the right thing to do. To quantify, for example, in a $25,000 wedding budget, $500 (for 3-4 girls) allocated to bridesmaid dresses equate to only 2%!
Evelina - I totally feel what youre saying! Its not rude, and my maid of honor totally agrees with you (she will pay for her BM dresses at her wedding). I’m paying for my future SIL’s dress (shes in grad school) but the rest of my maids have good jobs (and I’ve already paid for my BM dress to be in one of their weddings…)
No one really has difficulties affording a $150 and under dress (except my FSIL) but to be honest, I’ve been in one of my BM’s weddings and paid for my bridesmaid dress then, and i anticipate that I’ll be in my other 2 maid’s weddings and pay for my bridesmaid dress then.
I think most bridesmaids are sympathetic at how much money brides are spending at the time for their wedding. Mr. Penguin and I will be paying for 1/3 of our wedding, not including my dress and rings which we’re also paying for.
Miss Penguin- I’m glad you understood my point. I think that as long as everybody are OK with who’s paying that’s fine.
I also think that it’s always nice to find your bridesmaids a cheap option, which you are doing.
My girls are getting this gorgeous strapless gown in black from Nordstrom.com for $88!!
I got Ann Taylor dresses and had them use a 20% online coupon…they 3 of them also said they would definitely wear it again..
I bought all three of them their dresses & shoes & shawls — ON SALE at Ann Taylor : )
All of the above still cost around $150 per bridesmaid, and they don’t look cheap at all! The Ann Taylor Celebration line is great ; )
We are doing a beach wedding and they don’t have to wear major shoes… bare feet, flip flops or nice sandals are fine. I am making the sashes. I made them their pearl & ribbon necklaces. And their dresses… white, strapless from the Isaac Mizrahi collection at Target… regularly $40, I bought them on sale for $30.
I think it’s a little iffy to pay for some BMs’ dresses but not others. Could make for hard feelings if the other BMs found out.
I totally stressed over this for awhile too. I ended up selecting J. Crew dresses that were on clearance sale, so the total was about $130. Where it really starts to add up though, is making them buy certain shoes, get their hair done a certain way, manicures etc. I am taking care of those things so that the dress cost seems more reasonable. Also, don’t tell them they can “wear the dress again” - they won’t, and it was always infuriating to me to be told that as an excuse to spend more! Not having to hear that is priceless.
Moi - Its not a pick and choose thing, its my FSIL. Shes family, and most of all, she cant afford it. I think its more than okay to pay for her dress especially under the circumstances…shes in grad school, the rest of my BMs are my best friends, have good jobs, and I’ll be/have been in their weddings and will pay for my own dress if they require it.
I know it sounds like picking and choosing but I really dont see it that way…and I know if we didnt pay for her dress, my FMIL would, and I dont want her to do that.
I guess everyone handles their BM situations differently!
http://www.jasminebridal.com/html/en/web1_b2_3_a.asp?id=1111
I wore this dress in a recent wedding (different color) but it was very affordable (about $150) and looked really nice on 4 people with completely different bodies. It also comes with straps, if that makes you more comfortable. And i would definitely wear it again to the opera or symphony, and I am thinking ahead to the black tie New Year’s Eve that is coming up.
I would look online places — for instance, in NYC, RK Bridal has a no-hassle service, where they beat ANY online price by 5%, cutting some dresses down almost $100! The only con is that you need to get measured and get it altered yourself - but something you may want to look into. Some Jim Hjelm dresses I was looking at would have been well under $200.
Jen,
we actually have found a great dress by bill levkoff for $135 on houseofbrides.com…its $185 in store i believe! I’ll blog about it soon
I found a great dress for my BMs on Overstock.com. Came out to $40 including shipping. Then had them do whatever they wanted for shoes, hair & makeup. They looked great. I couldn’t imagine asking someone to pay $300. That’s how much I paid for my dress.
I let my sister/MOH pick — she had the most difficult-to-fit body and is the one on the tightest budget. And guess what she picked: a dress that is, ahem, $230. She vetoed every suggestion I sent that was $150 or less. Oh well, I tried!
On the up side, there will be no hair/make-up/shoe/jewelry costs and she’s already planning to wear the dress to another, non-wedding event that is the weekend after our wedding.
I stalked the dresses I loved on J.Crew and waited for the sale to be announced. The second it was on live on the site (ok… maybe like 20 minutes after), I called/txted/emailed all of my BMs and asked them to order every dress they liked in every style they liked, and offered to order/return dresses if they needed me to! They all got their dresses for around $80 (thank you free shipping and 20% off coupon codes that I sent their way as well) and some have already “recycled” their dress at other events this summer.
They all expected me to get some sort of crazy bargain for the dresses, so I just started early which made everything much easier in the end!
[...] wrote an interesting post today on Casual-Chic BridesmaidsHere’s a quick excerptIf I could afford to pay for all my bridesmaids’ dresses, I would. An [...]
I like the mix and match look, so I chose a color and let my bridesmaids pick out their own dresses. This way, they can find something they like, can wear again, and spend whatever they want to spend.
I picked what I considered to be an average-cost dress (about $150), but we paid for their travel and housing.
we also did ann taylor - they had a $50 off sale, plus we used a 20% coupon on top of that. It ended up being quite inexpensive!
ann taylor is great because they have codes & sales all the time!
I still think $150 is a lot.
Try the outlets– BCBG outlets will look high and low for all your sizes and they dresses are hot! Mine were $45 each
My wedding is very casual, so I picked a pattern and some bright cotton fabric. My sister is making her dress and my best friend’s dress, and my fiance’s sister’s dress will be made by their family’s seamstress.
No shoes necessary, we’ll be on the beach. I think the girls have gotten some inexpensive silver flip-flops to wear up on the patio during dinner afterward.
there was no question whether i’d pay for the girls dresses. they are family and good friends, so i definitely budgeted it in no matter what. i will appreciate their help during the planning and especially day of, so the dress is the least i can do. they will also be planning bridal shower/bachelorette party, so that would hopefully be their only expense. i’ll also be paying for their hair/makeup, but since we are wearing long dresses, they can do wear their own shoes. their gifts will probably be jewelry for the wedding. we could def use the cash elsewhere as we have to be careful with our spending, but they are best friends/family, so i can’t imagine not paying for them. they will be doing so much already.
I went a very casual route, and got dresses from chadwicks, added a sash, and the girls paid 20 bucks for their dresses. I paid for shoes and jewelry (20 bucks total). Here’s a picture of the dresses (it’s not great, I wasn’t please with our photographer, but that’s another story)
http://ronaldanthony.net/jbl07/pages/A-0045.htm
The dresses were actually more of an olive color in person. The dress is no longer online, or I’d include a link, but you may want to consider sites like chadwicks.com (some old lady stuff, but some other cute stuff), laredoute.com, \www.newport-news.com. Sometimes they have really cute stuff.
Good luck!!!!
Okay Miss Penguin, you may hate this dress, or it may be in the wrong size, but i think it’s adorable, especially for the price:
sizes 6/8, 10/12, and 14/16 are left. and it’s grey, which is what you’re looking for, correct?
Awesome ideas for bridesmaid dresses! Even though I have absolutely no taste, and might try to wear white sweats to my wedding… I love that you call us BMs…it’s like you are an old lady and are talking about your daily trip to the loo after your coffee and bran muffin. Gotta go take care of this BM! Wee! Love you.
My daughter’s brides maids wore As U Wish Ballerina Dress (Juniors) from Nordstroms Juniors # 37339 - $68.00 in black
Her friends were very happy with the dresses and they can be used again at a social function/cocktail party.
The fabric was lovely and hardly needed to be touched up after coming out of their suitcases. A steaming in the bathroom took care of the wrinkles.
Mrs. Penguin, Sacramento
Age and Occupation: 26, Video & TV Producer/Director/Editor
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 29, Doctor of Physical Therapy
Engagement Date: January 29, 2007
Wedding Date: June 7, 2008
Blogging Since: September 14, 2007
Venue: Winery in the Gold Country
About Me: I'm a silly mess of a girl who, above all else in this world, LOVES the Spice Girls. I eat sushi at least 3 times a week, and feel guilty about how much it costs the other 4 days a week. I love designer jeans and cheap accessories. I don't like sweets, but I love the UCLA Bruins!
Honestly, I would try Macys if you’re looking for less expensive dresses. They have really pretty dresses that they could possibly wear again for better prices. Actually, you could try any of the department stores.