Weddingbee Blog

With regards to my previous post, I just wanted to say thank you to Kate for the program wording idea and to let you guys know that the dress I liked. As Veronica said, it was indeed a Lazaro from the Spring 2007 collection. However, like Veronica said, after I fell in love with the thing, I did some investigating and found it was on the steep end of things, which being a budget bride with two grad school attending attendants, was a bit out of our collective reach.

Thankfully, after talking to Mr. Hummingbird’s Best Lady, she put me on to a great seamstress who will be able to replicate the dresses and alter the style in any way we might need to suit our ladies, so I’m really excited because I want them to look awesome and feel good in their dresses. Anyway, onto my entry!

Growing up in my house, the dinner table served as a place for great debate. Over whatever meal we were having that evening, we would discuss the day’s events and hash out arguments in favor or in opposition of whatever topic caught our collective interest.

On some nights my dad, to keep the debate going, would play devil’s advocate and take the least popular point of view and my mom and I would spend the duration of the meal logically punching holes in his argument. On other nights, it would just be a free for all and we would all present our ideas one after the other and playfully bicker into dessert.

The point of these evenings was never to point out who was right and who was wrong, but to encourage my independent thought and to show me that even though you love someone, you don’t have to agree with them 100 per cent of the time.

Since I do not live at home anymore, these debates are no longer nightly events, relegated instead to weekends and holidays, but they taught me a lot and I think, as an adult, they’ve made me a more balanced person. Not only am I probably more willing to consider the points of view of others, but I genuinely value someone who is willing to verbally spar with me when the situation calls for it. In college, I actually went out with a guy who was not willing to do this, instead blindly going along with whatever I said (seriously, I tested this by making up ridiculous opinions and seeing if he’d agree) and I ended up dumping him because I couldn’t stand the thought of being involved with someone who wasn’t willing to occasionally be a voice of opposition.

When thinking about spending the rest of your life with someone, there are obviously some things you want to agree on (usually the big three - sex, money, religion), but there are a lot of other areas that are more grey. For me, it was important to have a partner who also wanted to have kids and had similar thoughts about money, but not growing up in a religious household, I was more than willing to adopt whatever religious practices my spouse held dear.

So, as is my way, I’m up for some debate. Kids? Sex? Money? Religion? Diet? Location? What topics within your relationship are absolute must-agrees and what topics are up for debate?