With the stress of wedding planning the tiniest things can blow up into big arguments. In the movie Father of the Bride the bride and groom almost break up because he buys her a blender. In the house of the Peonys we rarely get into large arguments but we do bicker over one thing repeatedly: the order of names.
Miss Peony and Mr. Peony
vs
Mr. Peony and Miss Peony
It’s so silly but we still argue about it. Even as I write this I know Mr. Peony will probably comment about my placing my preferred choice first above. Mr. Peony says that in traditional Chinese wedding-related announcements the groom’s name comes first (plus he has a huge ego 
). However, in traditional western culture, which I’m more accustomed to, the bride’s name always comes first.
We decided on a semi-compromise with our invitations: my name will come first in the English and Korean translations, while his name will come first in the Chinese version.
When registering for a domain name for our website Mr. Peony went ahead and registered the his-name-first version without even telling me about it (probably because he knew we would argue about it). So I will be registering a my-name-first version also and point both URLs to the same site so that visitors can have both options. And yes, I’m that childish and immature. 
In addition to this argument we have tons more, ranging from my refusal to let him don a tailcoat, tophat and cane on the wedding day (he’ll look like a penguin)….all the way to which programming scripts and languages to use on our website.
What sorts of little fights do you and your fiance/husband have?
We totally had the “which name comes first” discussion. I’m not sure why it’s such a big deal, but it mattered to both of us. So we compromised and did each of our names first on different items or for different announcements. Miss. Peony, how will you be pronounced? Mr and Mrs? John and Jane Peony? Jane and John Peony? etc?
ok im chinese and everyone in my family has the girls name first haha. my FH is korean and he insists his name should go first. i think traditionally, the girls name goes first bc shes the one being given away, or something like that. but i am compromising. i let his name be first on the STDs. the invites will have my name first. and when we get announced at the reception, his name will go first.
Hmmm, we haven’t dealt with the name order issue… I guess he knows better than to go there! However, we did get into an arguement while registering, because I wouldn’t let him put an Xbox 360 on the registry. We also got into a little of a tiff about the bar situation (he wanted open bar, I wanted to serve beer, wine, and champagne to cut down on costs). I’m sure there will be more along the way!
We’ve put his name first because his first name begins with an M and I didn’t want it to get shortened to S&M!!! So it’s M&S instead. Simple, but so much better. Nobody has tried to correct us.
As for little fights… yeah, we’ve had them. And then we go “what’s wrong with us? this isn’t a big deal!!!” and we realize we’re just stressed out. It’s important to realize WHY you’re arguing.
normally, he pays attention to how much things cost and doesn’t really care otherwise, but he has gotten hung up on the randomest things for the wedding.
we had an argument about colors recently. i thought sky blue would be nice as the main color (bm dresses, invites, etc). he totally flipped out on this and i couldn’t figure out why for the longest time, since blue is his favorite color. turns out the combination of pale blue and weddings makes him think of my father’s wedding outfit. my dad wore a powder blue paisley tux (yeah, it’s really that bad) for my parents’ wedding and he was picturing himself in something similar. we’ve settled on a more ocean blue, to allay his fears.
We just argued because I didn’t think the ushers needed bouts. My (insane, possibly) reasoning was because they’re only ushering ONE person in! He was like, “They’ll BE IN THE PROGRAM, they should have flowers!” And I said, “They’ll be IN the program? And anyway, aren’t the parents seated before the music?” To which a whole ‘nother issue was brought up- mothers are part of the procession!
Mr. kiwi is a bitch sometimes. 
Oh man we always have the same stupid bicker sessions over and over. The name issue was the funniest one because his ego wanted his name to go first. But I know he’s super traditional so all I had to say was “it’s traditional for the bride’s name to go first” and I knew he would be waging an internal battle for the rest of the day. Does the ego win or the traditionalist win? The traditionalist won and I hardly had to say a word. Lol.
We have also argued a little over buffet vs. plated dinner, bar service, colour schemes and the venue. But really we don’t argue too much about major things except our in-laws. We fight about our families all the time. It’s kind of draining but inevitable; both our sets of parents are kind of nuts.
yes of course. bc my FI gives me a small budget to work with for the wedding, i cannot count how many times we argued what is important and isn’t important for the wedding. case in point, i had the longest argument with him on getting the best photographer bc we are not getting a videographer. he sees this as why do we even need a photographer let alone a videographer.
we are having the reception at his restaurant of choice bc he has to have chinese food for his relatives so that means i have to find ways to spruce the place up. allowing me some budget for having organza overlays should be reasonable with few other decors, but oh no, why do we even need that, he says. it’s unnecessary cost. grr..
im sure there’s more that will be added to the list, bc no matter what i do and try to cut cost, it will still not be enough for FI. I think if it was up to him, we would have no wedding at all and that is where I put my foot down. although he did say that he doesn’t want the wedding to be cheap-looking either bc we are trying to cut costs. However, the arguments tell me otherwise. =D Sorry had to vent there a bit! hehe
Driving. His. Because it sucks.
We don’t tend to argue about much else…my fiance is very good about letting stuff go, whereas I’m not so good at it. I’m trying to learn to be more like him (and to leave him alone while he’s driving…it’s tougher to do when I’m hungry, I’ve found), but it’s been a slow process.
Oh, the husband tailgates. I once mentioned that I thought tensing up before an accident would probably cause more injury, so I try to close my eyes and go limp when he slams on the brakes. Now he catches me doing it: “Did you just go limp?” “Um…maybe.” “I was nowhere near that guy!”
My FI wanted the whole tails, top hat, cane thing too. He even made the salesman at the tux shop bring him out a hat and cane. I told him if he’s standing at the end of the aisle in that.. I’m turning around. 
Plus, I think he would use the cane as a weapon and/or sword all night.
My husband tries to give me tips on things. Most of the time, I don’t mind, but if I’m grumpy and he’s giving me tips on cooking (he never cooks), I’ll say, “Then YOU can do it.” And then he shuts up.
Luckily, we never have the fight about what order our names are in - I go by Margo, and his (our) last name starts with “Go” also, so my name is always first to avoid having to say “Go-go.”
Mrs. Peony, New York
Age and Occupation: 27, Marketing Coordinator
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 30, QA Engineer
Engagement Date: June 28, 2007
Wedding Date: April 18, 2008
Venue: The Fountainhead
Blogging Since: August 7, 2007
About Me: Both Mr. Peony and I are huge computer nerds, and our conversations usually consist of the latest gadgets, programming languages, and video games. At the same time, I can also be very girly with an obsession with handbags, makeup, and high heels. And art! I've studied studio art extensively, almost majored in art history, and freelance as a web and graphics designer. Mr. Peony and I are having a ball of a time planning a wedding for 250(!) guests, doing our best to infuse our personalities (geeky chic) with the wishes of our very traditional Asian parents.
I remember this…my name was first because I was paying for most of the wedding (he paid for the honeymoon).