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Mrs. Jasmine, Chicago/LA Age and Occupation: 25, Attorney Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Attorney Engagement Date: March 24, 2007 Wedding Date: June 7, 2008 Blogging Since: September 20, 2007 Venue: Hotel on the westside of Los Angeles About Me: I'm a happy-go-lucky, imaginative spirit trapped in the body of a lawyer. I love reading, shopping, dining out, and exploring my beloved adopted city of Chicago with my fiance. We're planning the wedding of our dreams in my hometown of Los Angeles and we're excited to incorporate our cherished Indian/Pakistani customs and traditions.
About Mrs. Jasmine

Tale of a Football Widow

September 28th, 2007 @ 9:30 am by Mrs. Jasmine


Picture courtesy of Babble.com

Mr. Jasmine doesn’t just love football, he looooooves it. He would marry it if he could. He loves college football, professional football, football video games, football paraphernalia, football trivia, football message boards, etc. He crushed my dreams of a lovely fall wedding by saying it would be practically blasphemous to have a wedding during football season. “What about our friends with season tickets? And how can we possibly work around the schedules of all the teams? No matter what Saturday we choose, it will inevitably be during a very important game!” Not wanting to deal with a groom who is checking his iPhone during the ceremony for scores, I happily agreed to a spring wedding.

We both went to a football crazy law school, but somehow I never managed to get into the sport. I don’t really understand it and aside from ogling the hot players (why hello there Tom Brady!), it never really holds my attention. I might need to buck up though, since now our entire Saturdays revolve around college football, Sundays around professional football, and Monday nights are professional football again. Any other football widows out there? Any women who love football who can give me some pointers on getting into the game?

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44 Responses to “Tale of a Football Widow”

1.
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Nancy

I like watching football with my FH it helps me achieve my Sunday nap :) . He likes when I ask questions and sometimes I really get into the game. Although I never understand the flags. Thankfully he only watches Pro Football, but all of our weekends are planned around football. I always eagerly look forward to February.

 
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Miss Magnolia (message)  252 posts, Helper bee

Hey hey! I’d love to help!

I wouldn’t consider myself a football widow, because I love college football just as much as Mr. Magnolia, but most of the time the NFL completely disinterests me. So Mr. Magnolia spends his Sunday afternoons in front of the tv, and I’m either at the gym, out running, or doing something around the house. So, partial widow…?

My advice would be to pick a team to follow (your law school team would make sense!), and learn about the positions by linking them to an actual player. Most people know what the quarterback, the running back, the wide receiver, and the place kicker do, but what about the tight end? The safety — which is a position but also the name of a method of scoring? The guards?

Second, ask a lot of questions. I’m sure Mr. Jasmine would be more than happy to explain, particularly during what *may* not be a game he has to play super-close attention to!

Finally, a lot of college and professional teams hold sessions of “Football 101 for Women.” I’ve talked to several women who have participated in these types of events, and they always come out raving about them! Why not look into something like this?

Good luck!

 
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Miss Magnolia (message)  252 posts, Helper bee

P.S. That picture of Tom Brady is H-O-T. Too bad he turned out to be a not-so-good guy…

 
4.
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krissy (message)  25 posts, Newbee

i hear ya Miss J. - While we lived in PR where american football is not very popular, Fiance hid his true nature, but now that we live in Indiana near all his friends as well as his college team, he has become somewhat of a crazed football fan. He plays in 2 fantasy football leagues and invites people over ALL the time to watch the games (I mean, people invite themselves over all the time to watch games because of our hd plasma!) I could care less about football honestly, but I have learned to live with it as well. sigh.

 
5.
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kgr

I love love love college football (Go Utes!) but the NFL wasn’t that interesting to me until my husband convinced me to join his fantasy football league. Now I have a vested interest in almost every game on Sunday and Monday because one of my players is playing. If your fiance is in a fantasy football league, see if you can convince him to let you join next year. Not only will you be more interested in the games, but also it’s loads of fun when you can beat the boys.

 
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tyffaknee (message)  133 posts, Blushing bee

Hehe. I’m definitely not a football widow - I love football as much as he does! During football season, we both have already learned to reserve Sundays for football (we actually even moved a vendor appointment because it was during the Pats game). However, one really good reason (not THE reason) that we’re not having a fall wedding is because of the baseball post-season. I am a HUGE Red Sox fan, and if anything, he’s a baseball widow!

P.S. I love that you posted a picture of Tom Brady! Go Pats! :)

 
7.
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tyffaknee (message)  133 posts, Blushing bee

P.S.S. Can’t you tell I’m from Boston? haha.

 
8.
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Melissa

So, my fiance is a football coach (and an ex-player), which means that from August to November I don’t really see him, but when I do see him he’s diagramming plays on his dinner napkin, talking about the Patriots, or his old college team even. I liked football already when I first met him, but I love it even more now that I understand the plays and strategies behind it! I think once you learn a few things past the basics, like maybe take one of those “Football 101″ classes or take the time to watch even one game really closely to learn it on your own, it really helps. Plus, it’s fun to pick particular favorite players and root for them — I personally think Peyton Manning is quite dreamy :). Believe me, you guys who aren’t marrying coaches have it easy — I live with football seven days a week!

 
9.
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AMK

My sister’s fiance loves football and she loves entertaining — so they used to invite all their friends over to watch games and she would spend the time playing hostess. I know it sounds so 50s-cliche, but it worked well for them.

When I dated a football lover, I would sit with him and read a magazine. I feel no obligation to like everything my SO likes. :)

 
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tyffaknee (message)  133 posts, Blushing bee

Sorry to comment so much, but I just read kgr’s comment (#5). Def get into fantasy football! It’s a great way to get excited about almost all the games playing. I’m actually in an all girls league this year, and I’m more interested in other games (aside from the Patriots), because I’m rooting for the players on my fantasy team to do well.
Some of the girls in the league aren’t really into football, but are starting to get into it now because of the competition we have between each other!

 
11.
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Miss Kiwi (message)  384 posts, Helper bee

We decided on our wedding date because it was the end of his team’s football season (he’s a coach). Well, imagine our surprise to find out the playoffs begin ON OUR WEDDING DAY because of a schedule change!!

As if that’s not bad enough, the man can’t get his suit until the 6th (less than a month before the wedding) because he’s got FOOTBALL GAMES!!

At least you’re a football-only widow! I’m a football, basketball, track and volleyball widow. :(

 
12.
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Lynn

We have a group of friends made of football fan husbands and their widows. We plan a couple of parties on the BIG SEC weekends. Everyone brings food and drinks to go with the host family’s main dish (chili at my house). The guys turn on every t.v. in the house, each with a different game. The girls gather in the kitchen or out on the deck if the weather is good. More often than not we end up at a movie or shopping. By the end of the night everyone goes home happy. It has made me look forward to football season.

 
13.
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Amy

yes i agree. fantasy is a way to learn and stay interested (esp if you have a competitive streak). it also makes you want to watch the games to see how your “players” did. also, if you FI has a bunch of friends that are also interested, you can organize get togethers - ask them to bring wives/gfs. the girls can gossip and chit chat while the guys watch the games.

 
14.
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Jessica

It’s funny, because my FI was a football widow, until he joined my fantasy league. He still has no interest in watching the games, but at least now he doesn’t complain when they’re on all day Sunday, since he can check out the stats on his players.

Never really got into college football (it might have something to do with my school not having a team), but I live for fall when the NFL starts.

Just ask him to start explaining some of the plays. Ease your way into it.

 
15.
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NKC

I would be a football widow too, but I bit the bullet and decided to just love the NFL as much as he does. Neither of us went to big college football schools (D3 just doesn’t get national time), so Saturdays aren’t a big problem. I like to make an event out of Sunday and Monday football - beer, popcorn, snacks, etc. I try to have magazines on hand, so that if I get bored, I can read them; otherwise, I play with our cats and snuggle up on the couch, happy to get some relax and unwind time!

 
16.
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loveletter

I am not so much of a football widow, but I am a Halo widow. My husband loves video games ( I do too… but I am more of a Mario Brothers type of girl) and now that the new Halo is out…. oh boy.

 
17.
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Tali

heh. i wanted a fall wedding. not only was i forced to plan around the longhorn football schedule (fi has season tickets with his friends), but he also forced me to survey his friends about the away games, to see which one I could choose for my wedding. thankfully it was unanimous, and they all said that they’d show up since it was an untelevised game. oh the things we do. :)

 
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Mrs. Emerald (message)  901 posts, Busy bee

I have NO interest in football whatsoever. None, zilch, zero, nada. When he watches it, I look in the direction of the tv, but my mind is a million miles away. He LOVES pro football (not college tho, lucky me). You guys make me think that I should attempt to learn something about the game. Well, I DID initially try when we started dating. But really, its just not interesting to me in the slightest so I couldn’t get into it!!! *sigh*

 
19.
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JoJo

I love love LOVE college football! Go Noles! I grew up cheering for FSU (my family had season tickets), and then went to college there. My fiance, on the other hand, cheers for our arch enemy, UM. During the weekend we play one another, we separate so we don’t make each other angry with our trash talking! Every other Saturday, though, it’s a great time to bond on the couch and watch football all day long. I look forward to football season all year long!

My fiance works for an NFL team, so our lives revolve around football in the fall/winter as well. My dream was to get married at Christmas, but that was not a possibility - what if they make the playoffs? haha I don’t get as in to Pro Football, but I still enjoy watching it.

However — baseball, now that’s another story. My fiance played baseball through college, and he is a fanatic. I can’t stand baseball! So trust me, I can totally relate to catching up on my reading, my napping, my crafting, or whatever, while that sport is on TV! So, I guess I am a baseball widow!

 
20.
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AOEBuckeye

Oh I hear ya miss Jasmine. I’m thanking the football gods for allowing our wedding to occur. Both our teams have a by-week! Now leaving for our honeymoon on a Sunday….we still have to jump that hurdel…

 
21.
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Angel

Football season is when I get to catch up on my sleep. Every time we go over to my parents house to watch (much larger TV) I’ll take a nap. I’ve been doing this so long that watching football makes me want to sleep…whether or not I’m sleepy.

Hockey however is where you’ll find me wide awake.

 
22.
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Miss Jasmine (message)  1,154 posts, Bumble bee

Ooh…thank you for the Fantasy Football tips ladies! Mr. Jasmine loves fantasy football, so next season I’m going to join in :)

 
23.
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Cassi

I love college football. I’m getting married in 3 weeks so I made sure that my team, University of Oklahoma SOONERS, had an out of town game against a team that I’m not really worried about. As for the NFL, I might watch a game or two on Sunday, but I can’t stand to watch it all day and on Monday night. I just go in the bedroom and watch a girly movie. I’ve been a fan of NCAA football since I was little, but I’ve had to learn to like NFL. I usually follow the players I know either from OU or the Big 12. That way it will be more interesting for me.

 
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Miss Cherry Blossom (message)  696 posts, Busy bee

O.M.G. - mr cb is really into football as well, thank goodness our wedding is in spring, wouldnt want to interfere. His friends and he are really into fantasy football, I tried to share the interest but I’m just not into it, which is okay, while he’s occupied with that, I can craft =)

 
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Mrs. Lemon (message)  427 posts, Helper bee

Double ditto on the fantasy football front for the NFL. You’ll start to learn names, which teams are good/bad, and you’ll bond w/FI over all of it.
As for how to jump into liking the sport, I’m going to suggest you follow the Tom Brady route and get a crush on some of the players. Whether it’s because you like their looks, they have a super sweet mom, they went to your alma mater, or ??? Just find some players to love things about and you’ll be in the thick of it in no time.

 
26.
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Miss Tulip (message)  615 posts, Busy bee

Ha ha, no help on the football front, but I can say I feel your pain on the basketball end! We’re getting married in March — a/k/a “March madness” and the NCAA tournament. I’ve already vetoed having a TV at the wedding!

Leaving aside the obvious issues with that plan, given that Mr. T went to UNC (undergrad) and I went to Duke (law school), I’m afraid of fistfights between some of our wedding guests! ;-)

 
27.
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Mrs. Peach (message)  4 posts, Wannabee

Mr. Peach is a HARDCORE football fan of his alma mater. I used to know nothing about football and was a football widow until I started watching it every weekend with Mr. Peach and his friends. I dunno, I just got sucked into it and now I love watching it. Maybe because my school was a nerd school with no football team… but I just love rooting for something together!

Mind if I ask what law school you guys went to?

 
28.
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Joyful2

Actually, I think I’m more into football than FI is. He makes fun of me because I still check the local news website and keep up with my high school’s football team. I got into it because I was in marching band for four years. My biggest suggestion is to ask lots of questions. I bugged my co-bass clarinet player during games, and when I could finally recognize a play or call on my own he was very relieved. I’ve never gotten into fantasy teams, but that sounds like a good idea, too!

 
29.
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Tea

maybe you should ask my bf, the football [and baseball] widower! he does like football, just not as much as i do. while i don’t do the fantasy football myself [i can't be trusted to remember going back to keep track] i do have a team i follow [da raiders! even though they're recent play has been...lacking and questionable and sucky] but mostly teams i hate [the niners, cowboys, pats, broncos] so that makes it fun for me. lol.

so pick a team you like and that’ll get you at least vested somewhat into the play. i also joined a weekly pool at work where we try to predict who’ll win so that keeps me on my toes too.

while it can be a great bonding moment, i must add to watch when you ask questions. there’s nothing more annoying than having to stop and answer questions about what is going on every two seconds, especially if you just wait a second and it’ll all be explained to you by the announcer/ref. so pick your spots…like replays, timeouts and halftime are good moments. imagine if someone constantly asked you what everything was while watching your favorite tv show or movie. same idea.

 
30.
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Miss Jasmine (message)  1,154 posts, Bumble bee

Mrs. Peach: We went to Notre Dame for law school, so you can imagine what kind of environment that was for football. There was something really exciting about the tradition and excitement of it all. Notre Dame is not doing too well this season, so Mr. Jasmine has shifted his focus completely to his undergrad team, Michigan State.

 
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Mrs. Peach (message)  4 posts, Wannabee

Oh man, oh man! Our men went to rival schools. haha. Mr. Peach went to Michigan- both rivals of ND AND Michigan State! ^_^ Yeah, Michigan is having a not so hot year too. The first two Sats were horrible. I hate how the mood of the day is determined by the outcome of the game. Maybe that’s why I root so hard for the team. haha. =P

Oh yeah, a tip on getting into the game… first of all, learn to understand how it’s played. To me that was my first big step.

 
32.
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norcalbruin

I am a Madden widow. Football is a big part of his life. He played in high school, he watches pro ball over college (yeah, UCLA is not a big football school), but he loves playing Madden (got ‘08 not too long ago). Not any of it bugs me because I have been watching football since I was a kid so therefore understand the game and I know my players from the past and present. It’s pretty funny, the first time we had a football get together his friends were amazed that I knew my stuff. My preference is college bball though (is anxiously awaiting for Love’s homecoming).

Word of advice, don’t force yourself to like something just because of your partner. It becomes obvious and it may make them feel bad — like they are forcing you to like it. Oh, and Tom Brady gets on my nerves. It saddens me that he hails from NorCal and that he’s the face of the NFL…almost. Yuck.

 
33.
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Cindy

my guy is lucky he’s marrying someone that loves football and most sports also!

the suggestions above are a big help - it helps to get vested in the game somehow. i’m watching for old UCLA players, the failure of USC players, and my hometown team. fantasy football will definitely drive a huge interest as you start screaming at your players at why didn’t they catch that ball because it would have given you a few more points!

 
34.
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Jen

LOL, I think I’m in a similar position as you are. My FI loves to watch football and then also ALL the recaps on ESPN and all the local new stations as well.

The good thing is that we have two tvs. I do try to peel him away from football once in a while to watch a chick flick w/ me tho. haha

 
35.
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styleish (message)  96 posts, Worker bee

I am a football widow too!! I do not like football, never will and have no desire too. His family is a big time football family so I hate going to their house during football season. I end up reading magazines for hours.

This is our conversation when I told him I wanted a November wedding.

Him: “You can’t have it then. My family won’t come.”
Me: “What? Why?”
Him: “It’s the middle of football season! What if the Broncos are playing?”
Me: evil glare

I got my way anyway, the wedding is in November AND his family will be there. Seriously, a football game over a wedding in Jamaica? Please. :)

 
36.
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Vivian

II’m soo glad I’m not the only one. Yup yup. When I mentioned our date, 8.8.08 - FI had several happy reasons for liking it. #1 bel=ing that it was not during football season. Not sure if the pcamps or trining whatever already started, but whatever. And he could get back frmo honeymoon in time for the start of the season. FI is a HUGE football fan (College, Pro, he even follows some H.S.) His whole testosterone-dominated family is also into football big time - they have their own fantasy league and FI is in a group of bussies w/SC season-ticket holders. Friends and cousins have all thanked me for choosing a date off-season.
On the other hand, my friend was married on 9/1/07 this year (both SC alums) and you can imagine ALL the men were NOT HAPPY. In fact, even the priest mentioned that the groomsmen would like to hurry up and find out the score. I wouold not want that at my wedding.
I, myself, have gotten into football minimally. I am much more tolerant, ask questions, and actually going to the college games can be quite fun. My friend and I will be getting “I

 
37.
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Miss Jasmine (message)  1,154 posts, Bumble bee

Vivian: So funny– Mr. Jasmine and I attended a wedding on 9/1 and he grumped the entire time. I think that was the day Appalachian State beat Michigan too, so tons of the guys at the weddnig were checking the score on their phones and buzzing about the game during the reception. It was hilarious.

 
38.
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S

To all the Aussie footy widows this weekend- GOOD LUCK!

 
39.
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Video Games » Tale of a Football Widow

[...] Male Pattern Radness wrote an interesting post today onHere’s a quick excerpt [...]

 
40.
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Kristen

My wedding was on this past Sunday the 23rd. we lucked out and our home team of the patriots was playing at 1PM leaving ujst enough time for our guests to catch the gam and then head to our evening wedding. To make it up to the groomsmen I arrangd a little football game for them right after the ceremony. Which made for some aweseom photos….ohh the joys of compromising..:)

 
41.
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Mo

I just have to ask, did you go to Michigan Law? I’m a 1L here and I really love it. I’ve even been to one football game (our first win, Go Blue!).

 
42.
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Mo

Oops, I just saw your post about Notre Dame! Silly me!

 
43.
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A. E.

I did the ultimate love test. We planned our elopement for a Sunday afternoon next month. Ha! I asked him if this was okay and he said because he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me, missing one Sunday was fine because he still had a lifetime of Sundays to go. I tried to get into football but I can’t. FI loves almost all sports. He watches football, baseball, golf, and basketball. Luckily I actually love watching basketball. I actually went to my first NFL game and tailgating for a month ago. It was fun but no one wanted to sit near me because I asked too many questions. I ended up just people watching and daydreaming. Haha. I tried and I failed. Luckily I can just read a book, do errands, talk on the phone or read message boards instead.

 
44.
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vickie

After ready all those reponses, I feel like I am the only football widow out there! My hubby doesn’t just like football; he watches every sport! including golf (boring!) After being married 21 years, I have given up on trying to get him off the couch on Sundays!!

 


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Mrs. Jasmine Mrs. Jasmine, Chicago/LA Age and Occupation: 25, Attorney Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Attorney Engagement Date: March 24, 2007 Wedding Date: June 7, 2008 Blogging Since: September 20, 2007 Venue: Hotel on the westside of Los Angeles About Me: I'm a happy-go-lucky, imaginative spirit trapped in the body of a lawyer. I love reading, shopping, dining out, and exploring my beloved adopted city of Chicago with my fiance. We're planning the wedding of our dreams in my hometown of Los Angeles and we're excited to incorporate our cherished Indian/Pakistani customs and traditions.
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