Ms. Dahlia, Detroit/Cleveland
Age and Occupation: 24, PhD Student
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 24, IT System Administrator
Engagement Date: December 31, 2006
Wedding Date: May 2008
Blogging Since: September 19, 2007
Venue: United Methodist Cathedral & historic downtown hotel in Cleveland
About Me: I enjoy cooking, dancing and swimming. I am a geek and apply game theory to my everyday life. Winter is my favorite time of year, especially when spent curled up with good coffee and a book by Madeleine L'Engle.
Marriage and Politics
October 2nd, 2007 @ 5:51 pm by Ms. Dahlia
While at the gym this morning, I read this article about the relationship between marriage/family life and participation in politics; it specifically looked at how views about a woman’s role may impact her level of political involvement, whether voting, writing letters to members of congress, or attending a protest.
I mentioned it to Mr. Dahlia over breakfast. Back before we were dating we spent a lot of time discussing politics. This was just before the 2004 presidential election, and debating the pros and cons of each political party (not candidate as much; neither of us were huge fans of either presidential hopeful) was something we did frequently. Mr. Dahlia’s views over time changed, as he moved from focusing on a party’s stance on a single issue to considering a broader range of issues, and voting with the party that was more closely aligned with a majority of his preferences. (I like to think that this is a result of my persuasive powers that kept him from ending up like the man to the right in the comic below).
Comic available here.
I wonder how Mr. Dahlia has influenced my own political opinions. We have similar stances on a wide variety of issues- I wouldn’t be marrying him if we didn’t agree on many of the issues- but there are some where we have differing viewpoints. My parents have wildly different views on most political issues. One of my brothers and his girlfriend are pretty much two peas in a pod when it comes to political views. While I am more engaged in politics than Mr. Dahlia is, he pays closer attention to a wider range of issues than I do.
Do you and your partner/betrothed/spouse have similar views on political issues? Is that an area of compatibility that is important to you and your relationship? Have you been able to influence each other when it comes time to vote? 
8 Responses to “Marriage and Politics”
Our views are not at all the same, but then, neither of us are particularly interested in politics so although our views are different, neither of us feel extremely strongly about our views. It’s certainly not a dealbreaker for us and we don’t really enjoy talking politics either (with anyone, not just with each other. It’s just not something that either of us gravitate towards) so it doesn’t come up as a conflict.
For me it was important that we agree on religion and politics. I figured we would have enough to fight about over the years without worring about those two things. I take both fairly seriously. Besides, pillow talk isn’t as fun when one of you is trying to convert the other 
We have different political views, and while it has been the cause of a couple heated “debates”, we’ve learned to agree to disagree. We pretty much agree on the social issues - ie right to chose, gay marriage, etc - which I think is more important to me than the economic issues or our foreign policy (where we differ hugely).
We both have similar ideologies with our parents, so we’ve grown up with our own way of thinking, and I don’t think we’re going to be able to change each other’s viewpoints significantly. Not that I won’t keep trying
Oh, and I can’t access the link you posted, since it looks like it’s only accessible to to researchers through participating libraries and institutions. What conclusions did it draw?
I am in a similar situation to Jessica as far as which topics are sensitive. We have learned to kiss and change the subject when they come up. No matter how often we talk about it, neither of us is going to win the other one over. My fiance is a local politician and I am a grad student in political science… so politics comes up a lot! Our parents are both just like us- the dads are more conservative, the moms more liberal. We have fun with it- our rehearsal dinner is going to have an election theme. It should be very fun since the 2008 election will be right around the corner!
Jessica- the study found that political participation by men increased as their control over finances and how to spend small amounts of time increased. For women, what mattered was high levels of respect from her husband, and a belief in equality between the sexes.
Thanks for asking- I could have gone on for quite a bit of time about the article
We both agree on politics and religion, and I am an active Democrat, so it wouldn’t and couldn’t be any other way.
We have different approaches on how we would reform health care, immigration, etc, but overall we’re both progressives.
Not married yet, but we enjoy talking politics and he has definitely helped in my political evolution.
Good question!
When Mr. Pearl and I met, we were both on different ends of the political spectrum. Although we agreed on most social issues like the right to choose, death penalty, gay marriage, etc., our other opinions differed (immigration, foreign policy, etc). As Caroline mentioned, this was something that was very important to me since I was also an active Democrat and had volunteered during past presidential elections.
Over time, I’d like to think that I helped him see the light, particularly on certain issues and politicians The reality is that we’ve influenced each other — I’ve made him a little more liberal/progressive and he’s made me a little more conservative. Ultimately though, I think I’ve won (at least, I did in 2004 and probably will in 2008)!
As for religion, we’re both not highly religious people although his religion is important for certain aspects of his life. To that end, we were married in his church (Greek Orthodox) and plan to raise our children as members of that church. No big deal to me.
