My dad had but one request when it came to the wedding–that I get married in the family church and in turn, use the pastor that comes with it. It’s a package deal. Our premarital counseling sessions left a bad taste in my mouth to say the least. Unfortunately, issues with the pastor extended to the wedding day.
#1. Rude comments. He made rather insulting comments during the rehearsal about the bridesmaids and myself being Alpha females. On the day of the wedding, before I was to walk down the aisle, he came into the back room to rudely tell me that I didn’t have a guest book and that the reading I chose was incorrect length wise. I informed him that the guest book was at the reception and that the reading was FINE. Those are the kind of things you don’t bother the bride with on the big day.
#2. He didn’t let the photographer into the church itself. He didn’t tell me or the photographer that until minutes before the ceremony began. I actually didn’t know that at all until the photographer explained that’s why all of the ceremony pictures are from a distance. This aggravated me for a number of reasons–number one being it was such a big deal to me not to see Mr. Strawberry until I walked down the aisle. I don’t have very good shots of his face because of his rule. I do have the memory however! 
#3. His sermon. It was memorable to say the least. I will say, that normally, his sermons are very good. Somehow, during the course of talking about marriage, animal blood and guts got worked into the sermon. It was symbolic, I’m sure, but not exactly pleasant imagery during a wedding ceremony. I will say that it made the experience that much more memorable!
#4. The kiss. I’m a traditionalist. I like my church service old school. When it comes to the lord’s prayer, I want it chock full of thy’s and thou’s. I also wanted a traditional wedding ceremony. “You may now kiss the bride” is music to my ears. But he didn’t say that. And our kiss looked a little awkward because he didn’t say we could!
At the end of the day, the day wasn’t ruined and we were beyond ecstatic to be married!
“Is it weird having a wedding ring on?” “It burns!!” 
sounds like you made lemonade out of your lemons…GOOD FOR YOU! Who knows what I would have done…stormed out in a fit of rage? Murder on the altar? Its a mystery.
Wow, just wow. Sorry he was so awful.
I would complain about #1 and #2. You can in a polite way say that you would have planned accordingly if you had known the photo rule, and that future brides should be given guidelines for their readings.
Wow, I remember your post about the comments he made during your pre-marital sessions and I couldn’t believe his behavior then. Way to roll with the punches you crazy alpha-female. Congratulations.
What the heck??
Sounds like you handled a weird situation with grace.
Bummer. I think I actually looked at this church but decided against it in the end due to location.
I love the title of your post! And the church. And the rose petals. And the veil and the dress. Sorry the officiant was strange, but good for you for not letting unfortunate circumstances put a damper on your day! I love how your cheerful personality shows through the pictures!
unbelievable! I can’t believe he did that. I’m so sorry to hear that your pastor made your ceremony so difficult. The important thing is that you two are married and spending the rest of your lives together. I hope you didn’t let him rain on your parade!
I didn’t even know people like this existed anymore. Dang…I just checked out your previous post. I think that’s at least one person who took the “good wife” article seriously.
Yuck! Why do people do that? Especially people who should know better- like Priests and Pastors- because it is part of the job and they do it a lot.
I had a similar experience where the church coordinator ran all over my wedding coordinator and as I was standing at the front of the church about to walk down the aisle, one was yelling “Stop! this isn’t your music!” and the other was yelling “Go, go, what are you waiting for they can all see you!” Ugh- not what i dreamed my final thoughts would be before I walked down the aisle. Also, church lady told us the Priest (who did not attend rehearsal) would do all sorts of things differently than he did which led us looking awkward at the altar.
Oh well! At the end of the day we’re married right? And, even from a distance, your pictures are beautiful.
That’s really stinky that you have had such a negative experience with your pastor. We’ve just started Premarital Counseling and we love our pastor - he actually reminds us of a cross between Ed Norton and Quentin Tarentino but without any of the weirdness or gore that either of the two might bring to the table. Perhaps we lucked out but we get along with him wonderfully and have even decided to have him do our ceremony over either one of our long-time family clergy.
aw! that stinks. At least you’re happily married now and don’t need to deal with him again!
btw, the church you got married is in BEAUTIFUL!!!
that STINKS! coulda been worse though, my cousins pastor used ketchup for a word picture in their sermon. yep. ketchup. I remember just sitting there and staring, huh?
you’re all married now and the church was gorgeous right? and your dad is happy right?
I bet your photographer was LIVID!
I admire you Miss Strawberry.
I feel for you. I’m in a similar situation. Our Pastor isn’t quite as bad. He is a follow the rules kind of guy and I swear some of these are his own rules not that of the church. He also say you may kiss the bride or any of those oh so traditional statements that you might hear at the end of the ceremony. I might just turn around at the end of the ceremony and say it out loud, so that we can kiss. Church’s sure do have odd rules sometimes. Glad you made it through and you are happily married now. Congrats
Mrs. Strawberry, Seattle
Age and Occupation: 25, Radio DJ, Advertising Sales, Day of Wedding Coordinator
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Engineer
Engagement Date: 07/04/2006
Wedding Date: September 1, 2007
Venue: Lake Union Cafe, Seattle
About Me: I'm a Navy brat that has lived all over the world. I love reality shows that are in poor taste, going to new restaurants, and trying to be crafty. Emphasis on trying!
Mrs. Strawberry - you are such a good sport - I’m sorry your officiant was a dink though!