Miss Peony had a great post recently about different aspects of the 4Cs of diamond shopping- cut, clarity, carat and color.
Which got me thinking about my own engagement ring. I do not have a “traditional” engagement ring, in that it isn’t a diamond solitaire, or even consisting only of diamonds. The concept of “the traditional diamond engagement ring” stems from a giant advertisement campaign by DeBeers in the 1930s. This Slate article does a good job of discussing the evolution of the engagement ring.
Conflict and corporate sponsored tradition aside, I knew that a diamond engagement ring wasn’t for me. When we first started looking at rings more than six months prior to getting engaged, we looked at a lot of different things. And trying on diamond rings just didn’t feel like me. It was too sparkly, too bling-y, too girly, and not in a good way. And I am rough on my hands, so I knew that a traditional solitaire and setting wouldn’t work for me. 
(l to r: round solitaire with tiffany (prong) setting, princess solitaire with prong setting, both from Blue Nile) So we started looking at stones, and, not surprisingly, I was drawn to red. I love the look of deep red stones.
(the Carmen Lucia Ruby from the Smithsonian)
In the process of looking at stones, we learned about a very cool gemstone that is a favorite among jewelers and is not well known by the public. It is rarer than diamonds are, and comes in nearly every color of the rainbow. May I present to you…The Spinel
(image found here)The thing that I really like about spinels is that they come in a deeper red color than rubies typically do, which tend to be more bright red/pink red. I love the color of garnets, but they are an incredibly soft stone that is not durable enough for everyday use in a ring. Spinels are an 8 on the Mohs hardness scale; sapphires and rubies are 9, and diamonds are 10. They are durable enough that synthetic versions are used to create the stones in class rings. Once we figured out the type of stone, we had to find the right stone, and then figure out a setting.
What are your thoughts on a non-diamond engagement ring? Do you have an alternative engagement ring, or a completely different symbol of engagement?
I was actually really opened to a non-diamond engagement ring. FI, however, is super traditional with things like that and insisted on a diamond one.
I’m not complaining. 
Wonderful! I want a ruby engagement ring, and the boy already knows it! I also want a ruby wedding band. Well, actually, it doesn’t even have to be ruby. Lab created deep red stones are fine with me.
I have an aquamarine engagement ring. FI knew I didn’t want a diamond (and that we couldn’t afford it) and I love the color. It was tricky finding a wedding band though, because it was not a traditional engagement ring. I ended up finding an anniversary band that fit perfectly and I love the set!
I would have been fine with an untraditional engagement ring… in fact, when we were dating, he made me a ring from a fork as a “promise ring” and I told him I would be fine if that was my engagement ring! He ended up going with a traditional diamond though. (I still wear my fork ring every day on my other hand!)
A friend of his bought an antique spoon at an auction and made his fiance a spoon ring for her engagement ring. I thought it was really sweet and different. She loved it.
I love non-traditional rings…I think they show a couple’s confidence and independence.
I really wouldn’t have minded any ol’ ring, but it was Mr Peony who insisted on a diamond ring (I just ended up doing all the research for him). One of my good friends has a GORGEOUS emerald ring as her engagement ring. She loves it but she says that a lot of times, people don’t realize that it’s an engagement ring because it’s not a diamond. I guess that’s the only con to having a non-diamond.
Oooh so pretty!
One of my closest friends is from France and told me that in Europe, engagement rings aren’t really as big a deal as they are here. I think most people just get a band. The best part? She also said she’d rather get a grand piano than an engagement ring.
i think that a non-diamond engagement ring is great. i told my fiance that a diamond wasn’t necessary, but i still got one anyways. i wanted an aquamarine (his birthstone). and in “the old days” diamonds weren’t used in engagement rings…
[...] Miss Dahlia wrote a fantastic post today on “Our Alternative To Diamonds”Here’s ONLY a quick extractIn the process of looking at stones, we learned about a very cool gemstone that is a favorite among jewelers and is not well known by the public. It is rarer than diamonds are, and comes in nearly every color of the rainbow. … [...]
I have a beautiful, traditional solitaire diamond ring with a white gold band and a perfect diamond. I was very open to a non-traditional (or rather, traditional prior to the diamond) ring, and my fiancé was open to them too. We did not want a conflict diamond, and so this was a good option. I trusted him to pick out the perfect ring though - and I am so happy. We ended up going with the diamond because we both felt that I didn’t want to have to explain myself everyone looked at my finger. I wanted people to know right away that I am getting married!
I have a diamond e-ring, but probably wouldn’t if my mom hadn’t given us my great-grandmother’s diamond. All we had to pay for was the setting! And it’s a really beautiful diamond, probably cut with a Singer sewing machine at the end of the 19th century.
He also gave me an opal necklace that he bought in Australia as an engagement present, which I love as much as my e-ring.
As an engagement present, I gave my FH a replica of Brancusi’s “The Kiss” to signify my love for him. I can’t wait for it to decorate our house!
My ring was the result of a collective search at a local art fair. We scoured every jeweler’s booth there and pretty much the last booth that existed had The Ring. It’s set in sterling silver and has a pink tourmaline stone, with intricate carving around the band. We love that the ring is conflict-free, uniquely-made, and that the story of finding it is so fun. The jeweler was engaged herself, so we got to meet both of her and her fiance.
We’re still deciding on wedding bands, but I think this ring will turn into a right-hand ring.
My sister got a sapphire r-ring and it’s gorgeous!
I have a peridot e-ring, which i love, since I didn’t want diamonds and it is extra special since its my birthstone and also the month my fiance proposed in!
So….pics of your ring??
I love spinel, too. You know those multicolor sapphire bracelets everybody had a couple years ago? Sapphires set side-by-side in a color span of the whole spectrum? Yeah…I’d love to get one of those in spinels sometime With *all*I that money I’ve *always* got to just throw around, y’know 
hehehe
my fiance and i were both opposed to new mall-store diamonds– cookie-cutter, conflict-ridden, over the top. a friend of a friend owns an antique jewelry store in town (2 of our friends’ engagement rings came from her), and that’s where he went for mine. it’s circa 1930, handcrafted, and has so much more personality than the new ones. i just love that he went in this direction– it’s very us. pictures here: http://www.flickr.com/photos/intermittent/sets/72157602079543280/
Personally, I don’t think engagement ring has to have a diamond. Recently I saw gorgeous sapphire engagement ring and if it wasn’t that I am diamond kind of girl, I would have loved to have it. I wear pearls a lot and so diamonds are easy companion, also I feel that engagement is one time when girl can get really beautiful diamond ring, I can always get sapphire ring for the anniversary or birthday which is a reason why I would like to go down the diamond route.
I could have written this post! I was leaning toward a colored stone anyway, but we were in a mall store, and what they had for colored gem settings wasn’t very inspiring. I ended up trying on the traditional rings, but hated how they looked on my hands (”too blingy” was exactly how I described it!). So I started to think I’d skip straight to a single band ring that would double as my wedding band … and discovered anything thicker than 4 mm gave me “man hands.” There was one diamond right-hand ring with a setting interesting enough to consider, but it was a high setting that looked easy to damage… I finally found my ring in the clearance rack. It’s tanzanite, and I am not normally a big fan of purple stones (my birthstone is amythyst, and it looks like a chunk of grape jelly to me), but the stone is a nice icy lavender that is perfect on this ring. However, the real draw for me was the setting, which has deep-set point diamonds and baguettes, and a sort of estate-jewelry look. And my husband loves that he paid less than $200 for it.
I think that it whatever you and your signifigant other decide that you love. I think that non-diamond engagement ring are great.
I had to convince my fiance not to get me a diamond ring since he’s more traditional than I am. In the end, we compromised and got an oval cut sapphire ring with small round Canadian diamond sidestones. I absolutely love it.
My bf (future fiance) are both in agreement that we don’t want a diamond ring, for most of the usual reasons (conflict diamonds, De Beers monopoly, not very creative or traditional, etc). I looked at a variety of options before settling on a colored sapphire. Sapphire is special to me because it’s my birthstone. However, I want something a little different from the usual blue color, especially since I have birthstone jewelry. I’m leaning towards a pink, green, or padparadscha sapphire. I think that my ring should represent who I am, as well as who we are as a couple. A cookie cutter diamond doesn’t represent either. The Natural Sapphire Company (www.thenaturalsapphirecompany.com) is a great source for sapphire jewelry or stones, in case anyone is considering them.
Ms. Dahlia, Detroit/Cleveland
Age and Occupation: 24, PhD Student
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 24, IT System Administrator
Engagement Date: December 31, 2006
Wedding Date: May 2008
Blogging Since: September 19, 2007
Venue: United Methodist Cathedral & historic downtown hotel in Cleveland
About Me: I enjoy cooking, dancing and swimming. I am a geek and apply game theory to my everyday life. Winter is my favorite time of year, especially when spent curled up with good coffee and a book by Madeleine L'Engle.
I have a client with an emerald cut Sapphire e-ring. You can definately see scratches in it, despite the setting prongs being set higher to help protect it. Her jeweler told her that while it is a 9 on the hardness scale, the difference between 9 and 10 is very big. Apparently a cut with smaller facets would show the scratches less.
That said, I love the idea of different stones for e-rings!