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A sand ceremony is ideal for a beach wedding or any other windy location which might pose a problem for the traditional unity candle. Like a unity candle, the blending of the sand symbolizes the joining of the bride and groom, or the joining of their families.
(photo credit: Ben Chrisman)
Usually, the ceremony requires 3 vases or vials (or you can even use sea shells).
(photo credit: Elizabeth Medina)
One vase for the bride (filled with colored sand), one vase for the groom (filled with another colored sand), and a sometimes larger (empty) center vase for the bride and groom to combine their sand in. The two different colors of sand symbolize the separate lives of the bride and groom and their families. Remember, this is a great time to incorporate your wedding colors!
Here’s how it works:
The Groom commences the ceremony by pouring a portion of his sand into the empty vase. The Bride then pours some of her sand into the center vase. They keep doing this, alternating colors creating a layered effect until the center vase is almost full. Then to complete the ceremony, they can simultaneously pour their sand into the center vase.
(image via here)
If you are having your ceremony directly on the beach, a nice touch would be having your officiant scoop up a little sand from the beach with a sea shell and pour it into the small bottle to symbolize the building of the foundation of the relationship and to give you a memento directly from the beach.
For examples on how you might word the ceremony, check out this site.
Here are some phrases that really seem to capture this type of ceremony:
“Officiant: _________ and _________, may your love always be as constant as the never-ending waves, flowing endlessly from the depths of the sea. Just as there will never be a morning without the ocean’s flow, may there never be a day without your love for each other.
or
Officiant: _________ and _________,today you are making a life-long commitment to share the rest of your lives with each other.
Your relationship is symbolized through the pouring of these two individual containers of sand; one, representing you, _________ and all that you were, all that you are, and all that you will ever be, and the other representing you, _________, and all that you were and all that you are, and all that you will ever be.
Each one holds its own unique beauty, strength, and character. They can stand on their own and be whole, without the need of anything else. When the two are blended together they represent an entirely new and extraordinary love relationship. Each grain of sand brings to the mixture a lasting beauty that forever enriches the combination.
As you each hold your sand the separate containers of sand represent your lives to this moment; individual and unique. As you now combine your sand together, your lives also join together as one. /p>
The life that each of you have experienced until now, individually, will hereafter be inseparably united, for the two shall become one. Just as these grains of sand can never be separated and poured again into the individual containers, so will your marriage be.”
(Photo credit: Cecilia Dumas)
The ceremony can also be planned to include your parents or children, giving each their own color of sand. Of course you don’t have to be having a beach ceremony to incorporate this into your wedding.
We haven’t decided if we are definitely going to have one yet, but it’s something to seriously consider. What do you guys think? Are you doing a sand ceremony?
we’re doing a sand ceremony for a completely different reason than you gave. My fiance and his daughter and I are using it as the family blending portion of our ceremony. she picked out the colors of the sand and I’m having her help with all parts of the ceremony so this will be meaningful to her (she’s 6)
That’s so sweet kimi, I’m sure that will be a special moment for your FI’s daughter. My fiance and I are probably going to do the sand ceremony - we’re skipping the unity candle due to having an outdoor wedding, but we wanted to incorporate one symbolic ritual into the ceremony. I like the sand ceremony and also the blessing of the hands, so we have to decide which of the two we will be using.
A cousin of mine did, and it was pretty cool…actually their whole ceremony was awesome.
I’d say that if it’s at all possible, practice pouring together with regular sand. The bride and groom had two different colors of sand and a couple of times they had uneven pouring. It doesn’t seem like a big deal, but those big blocks of colored sand (yellow and gold) in the jar looked kind of strange against the evenly poured parts. And when it’s done right, the effect is cool.
neither unity candle or sand for me. just sounds like another thing to make me nervouse about.
We didn’t do a sand ceremony, but rather a honey ceremony. In a honey ceremony, the bride and groom dip their pinkies into a little bowl of honey and feed it to each other. Someone else holds up a mirror so that the couple can watch what they are doing. The officiant says something to the effect of always speaking sweetly to each other and nourishing each other for the rest of your lives. Then that mirror is hung in your house as a constant reminder of that moment. It’s sounds a bit weird, but it’s actually a very touching ritual.
I am thinking of doing a sand ceremony only b/c our ceremony will be a Lakeside Affair and there is a good chance that the wind will pick up and blow out the candle during the ceremony…if it blows out I might just freak and think its a sign…
We used the sand ceremony during our outdoor wedding. It worked out wonderfully and many guests complimented us on it. Most had never heard of it before and loved words that accompanied it.
We used the same color sand, I didn’t like the color idea. We also poured at the same time. My mom found a ‘kick-a$$’ glass sculpture-ish thing to use as the center vase. We now have it on our mantel. I love seeing it everyday and being reminded of our ceremony!
BE CAREFUL!! We had a 3′ pub table with a tablecloth holding the vases. (I laid my bouquet on the table during the ceremony - which turned out pretty) After the ceremony while we were taking pics the winds picked up and almost sent the tablecloth - vases and all - flying. We saved everything just in the nick of time!
We didn’t practice the pouring - which is surprising because we look right in sync in the pics.
I do like the shell idea for pouring at a beach ceremony!
Kimi, that’s SOOO sweet! I’m sure that will be a very special moment for you all! And M, that honey ceremony sound sooo cool! If we didn’t already have something set, I’d definitely have to look into that! What culture is it from?
We’re doing a handfastening ritual as the focal point of our ceremony. I found some really awesome samples online and then adapted them to be more spiritually neutral. Since we have different religious represented among our families we decided to have a strictly civil ceremony in order to not offend anyone (although I have a feeling even that will offend some). I’m hoping it’ll be really nice plus it goes perfectly with our Celtic theme and our heritages.
Another add-on to the sand ceremony that I’ve seen is for the groom to have one color, the bride another, and natural sand symbolize God. The officiant pours in a layer of the natural sand before the couple combines their saind, and adds another layer on top. I love this idea, but I’m pretty sure we’re going with the unity candle.
We did the sand ceremony or the Mixing of the Sands ceremony at our outdoor ceremony and it was a hit! We have received so many compliments on the ceremony as well as the symbolism. Unfortunately I waited too late to order the sand from a website and I couldn’t find a shade of pink anywhere in the stores around here *we live in a small town* so I thought I was going to a) forget about the sand ceremony or b) use colors i didn’t prefer. However, my mother came to the rescue and I thought I would share with ya’ll and alternative to sand: SALT
It looks like sand and pours like sand. We took sidewalk chalk in our desired colors pink and blue and rolled the chalk over the salt until all of the white salt was the prettiest shades of pink and blue you ever did see! We also used white salt because the reading we chose incoporated our religious beliefs.
Salt is alot cheaper than sand and it doesn’t attract bugs like sugar! Who knew being a procrastinator could help you save money? It usually makes things more expensive!
here is the reading we chose: *Unfortunately I can not remember the website I got this from*
Officiant: (Bride/Groom) and (Groom/Bride) will now come together for the Mixing of the Sands. Just as Jesus Christ is the Lord of their lives and the Rock of their Salvation, He will now be the solid foundation that holds their marriage firm. This is symbolized by the white sand in the bottom of the bottle. (Bride/Groom) and (Groom/Bride) both have sands that symbolize their individual lives and selves. As they pour their sands in together, it shows how their lives- once separate- are now becoming intertwined as one. Just as it would be impossible to separate these sands once poured, their union shall make them inseperable as well. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
When we were considering having the wedding in hawaii we definitely wanted to have a sand ceremony! I saw these scented colored sand that i thought was perfect for the ceremony!! Love the cool shaped vase!
My friend did this at her wedding and it was beautiful (in fact i think the same reading as your #2 option). I really want to do it also, especially with the shell as we are having a seaside wedding (DW).
Thanks for the script options!
One of my friends did a similar version of this, but with water. Then you really can’t tell the difference between the bride’s & groom’s contributions… and you don’t have a keepsake at the end either (for better or for worse)
Our wedding officiant did a great job and his website has some suggestions on how to do it: His website is Officiant Guy. We thought he’d be thrown for a loop when we sprung the sand ceremony on him at last minute (like literally 2 minutes before the wedding ceremony) and he was so smooth.
Without missing a beat, off the top of his head, he came up with beautiful words and made us cry, (and my dad cry, who is the toughest nut to crack) while we poured the sand.
Try his website for sand ceremony suggestions http://www.officiantguy.com and if you’re in L.A. book him. He’s totally worth it.
The best sand ceremony I have seen is using an actual hourglass you can save after - much better than any vase or the candle definetely! Check it out at http://www.heirloomhourglass.com
[...] on the center vase. It hasn’t arrived yet but I’ll be sure to take pictures when it does. Miss Lovebird is also considering a sand ceremony, be sure to check out her post as she has some great [...]
We will be doing the sand ceremony as the family blending part of our ceremony. Instead of having the plain sand represent God (since we will be having a civil ceremony) we will be having both sets of parents pour the “foundation” sand into the bottom. His parent will have the lighter color sand and mine the darker color sand. Then his son and the two of us will be pouring our sand on top together. After the wedding I plan to make a set in the smaller vases for the parents as a gift topped with a gel candle so the sand doesn’t spill out. I also plan to turn ours into a gel candle to keep the sand in.
The best selection of colored sand for the use in the unity sand ceremony is available online at http://www.moonglowcandles.com. It’s so reasonable too! The sand ceremony is very popular right now and a great modern alernative to the unity candle ceremony. And you get a cool keepsake too !
We are having a sand ceremony at our wedding. I’m am REALLY excited about it. This is my 2nd marriage. We did the Unity Candle at the first and I wanted something different for this one. Something unique to the two of us. Even our invitations are something different. We both love to read so the invitations for the wedding are book marks. 
We are planning to do a sand ceremony at our wedding too! We both grew up on the beach (I’m from Cape Cod, he is from the Caribbean), so my hope is that we’ll get vases of sand from the beaches that we grew up on and combine them into one.
Since we’ll be using real sand, someone warned me about little bugs getting in there! But I really like the symbolism of it so I want to stick with it. Did anyone else use real beach sand (not the colored stuff from the store) during their sand ceremony?
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Mrs. Lovebird, New York/Cancun Age and Occupation: 25, Attorney Fiance's Age and Occupation: 25, Medical Student Engagement Date: September 22, 2006 Wedding Date: July, 2008 Venue: Dreams Cancun Resort & Spa About Me: Born and raised New Yorker planning a destination wedding in Cancun, Mexico. Got proposed to in Cancun, so it’s only fitting we are going back to get married. I love trivia, board games, bargain shopping, asian dramas and eating yummy food!
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