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My gameplan for bm dresses has evolved over time. My first instinct was to pick a color at David’s Bridal and let them pick their styles. However, there are only a few (tea length or shorter) styles available in “peridot”:
These are all pretty, but not so much that I would want to force their prettiness upon my bms. So, my next thought was… forget what they want! I’ll find the prettiest dress in the world and make them all get it. Unfortunately, I just couldn’t do it - one of my bms in particular is not much of a “peridot” wearer, so if I’m forcing her into this color, I want her to at least pick the style.
That’s when I decided. They would pick their own dresses, from wherever the heck they could find them. And the color? I would send them some color inspiration “friends” to help them along the way. After some time at A.C. Moore, I spent the afternoon doing this:
I cannot bring out paper products without incurring the wrath of the paper master.
These are tags I made for each of the “friends”… they each describe how the friend is going to be incorporated into the wedding.
So here’s what I did.. I got them each a little box, in which I will be sending them their friends. Their friends include: 1. The cardstock used on STDs/invitations 2. The paper that we’ll use for program covers 3. The fabric that I’m going to make table squares from 4. Ribbon that matches - it hasn’t found its place in the wedding yet. 
In addition to their “friends,” I included a card telling them how much I appreciate them, AND laying down some ground rules (i.e. length of the dress and accent colors). I’m thinking I may also include a list of websites that I’ve already checked out. They’ll go out tomorrow!
Is anyone else letting their bms pick the dress?
Hi! My bridesmaids and jr. bridesmaid actually wore those peridot dresses from David’s Bridal. One wore the one with the skinny straps and bow, two had the strapless one (one of them used the extra length to add wider straps to the top), and my jr. bridesmaid had the jr. dress that comes in peridot. They looked great! I hadn’t planned on doing that - but I gave them months to find a green dress, and it was just too hard for them to find something. I didn’t give them the helpful inspiration swatches that you did, so that will probably make it easier. But I know for some of them that it was just easier to go to DB and pick from what they have there, knowing it would definitely “match.” Hope everything goes smoothly!
I am! I love the tonal look and this way, they’ll all look good because they’re wearing something they like.
And just so it doesn’t look too crazy, I’ve decided that their bouquets will be made up of one flower, in one color to draw it all together. 
Have you tried dessy or aftersix? They have so many different colors that come in different styles. I used them over davids and the girls all picked their own dresses.
I should have done this, I should have done this, I should have done this. I think it every time I look at the pictures, knowing how much they spent on their “wear once and then eBay” David’s ensemble.
And the shoes! I told them what shoes to wear! For an outdoor wedding, in grass! I sent them panicked emails when the shoes I had specified were discontinued! What the hell is wrong with me?!
Much to my mother’s chagrin - I am! They will all find aqua-ish dresses that are cocktail or tea length and not made of shiny material. I sent them all a candle from Pier 1 showing them the colors I envisioned (the candles had a couple of different shades of blue in them). They can have whatever top they would like - just no sleeves. Hopefully it will all turn out looking great!
I had such different personalities and body types to deal with that I chose a line–Jasmine B2 and let the BM pick whatever dress they wanted in the color I chose (espresso). Each went to a local salon–they live on both coasts–to find their size. I then took their info to netbride.com and ordered all the dresses at once. This was such an easy and INEXPENSIVE way to go. Each BM saved at least $60 on their dress over the salon price and they have a dress that they were comfortable in and looked amazing!
I was a bridesmaid in a wedding that did this; the bride wanted each of her girls to find a light blue sundress. Although it took much, much more time shopping for the dress, I appreciated the fact that the dress suited me and I could wear it again. And it was fun seeing six different styles of dresses the day of the wedding! Our personalities were able to show through!
Your idea of giving swatches is such a helpful one, Miss Bubblegum! I’m sure your bridesmaids will appreciate having the references while they shop.
I picked the red color from David’s Bridal (and there are tons of shades of red) and told my BMs to wear any style dress that is a certain shade of red. My BM’s got their dresses from Lord & Taylor, David’s Bridal, and Banana Republic. The girls were happy because they got an excuse to buy a new dress - and in a style that was flattering to their body type. My ceremony pictures came out fabulous.
I had my girls get dresses froma place called twobirds http://www.twobirdsbridesmaid.com/
The dress can be wrapped 10 different ways…and all 8 girls are wear it differently.
I have one BM that’s a first year intern working 80 hour weeks at the hospital, and one BM that’s on bedrest due to complications with her pregnancy. I didn’t want them to worry about going to find a dress, so I just went with two of my BMs, we picked a dress they liked, and they’ll all get the same color and style. I’m also personally not a fan of mismatched dresses, so I was happy they all agreed to this option.
Since the dresses are floorlength, they can wear any color or style of shoe that they want.
Miss Bubblegum, sorry this is not bridesmaid dress related - but when I read “table square” I was intrigued - I am thinking about making my own table overlays as well. Will you be telling us more about this in time? I’d love to hear what you’re planning!
I put my MOH in charge of picking the dress vendor — she has the most difficult-to-fit body type and smallest budget. She chose Simple Silhouettes. They have great, high quality, fashionable options in an endless array of styles and colors — I picked Azalea. Each ‘maid then picked her own style. To help alleviate some of the cost, I’m picking up half the tab.
Nope — we chose together as a group, but I wanted my BM’s all in the same dress. While I like the look visually of wearing something different, we’re having a black tie wedding and our colors are black and white. My bridesmaids will be wearing black (obviously… since I will be the one in the white) but since it is a downtown, evening, black tie wedding, I imagine that quite a few of the guests will also wear black dresses. I wanted some way for the bridesmaids to stand out as bridesmaids and not just guests, and we decided that putting them all in the same black dress would help. I just felt like telling them each to pick out their own floor length black dress would make them look like any other guest, since it’s not like we’re using some unique and rare color scheme!
hmm… I totally want my BMs to pick their own… surprisingly, none of them seem like they want to pick their dresses!
At first I chose a dress, but then decided that they could pick out any chocolate brown dresses. But MOH decided that they both (I have a maid of honor and a matron of honor only) should wear the same dress. She didn’t think it would look good if they didn’t match!
I’ve told all of mine (5) to get a knee-ish length black dress - I don’t care what it looks like. And they’re all freaking out on me, especially my sister who is the MOH. They’re afraid they’re not going to match! So I had to explain to dear sister that that indeed is the plan - I don’t really want them to match. My dress has black in it, which will complement them nicely - and the white flowers will really pop against their dresses. And they all have such different body types, I didn’t want to force them into anything, and I want them to be able to wear it again. So we’ll see how it turns out or if I need to give them a little more direction - I’m doing this for them!!
wow. the twobirdsbridesmaid dresses are awesome!!
I was stressing on trying to save my bms $$ too, but i’ve decided that i’m going to be selfish on this one. I’m a pushover most of the time. I want all my bms wearing the same dress and the same shoes. I figure…if i was chosen to be a bm at their wedding, i’d be willing to pay whatever they wanted me to; it’s their day! while it’s unfortunate, i can’t afford their gowns on top of mine…i also figure…i’m spending a bundle for them to be a part of the wedding. so =P.
One of my best friends…she’s going to pick the color and fabric and let us bridesmaids pick the style….
i’m having my sister be my only bridesmaid, so that made everything easier. i just sent her photos of dresses in the styles and color range that i’m thinking of and then let her find something on her own since she won’t need to match to anyone. but, i think even if i did have other bridesmaids, i’d still do it the same way just so they could find something they either really liked or that was really inexpensive.
Well since my mom was the only one, yes. Plus it’s somewhat difficult for a woman in her 50’s to find a dress that’s more than just ‘mother of the bride’ but not quite ‘the young/cute bridesmaid’. My only request was that it be purple! She looked superb and hot in her dress!
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Mrs. Bubblegum, Exeter, NH Age and Occupation: 24, Actuarial Analyst Fiance's Age and Occupation: 24, Ressearch & Development Engagement Date: February 9, 2007 Wedding Date: May 2008 Blogging Since: November 2, 2007 Venue: Dunegrass Golf Club About Me: I can be summed up by the four things I love most: kitties, cheese, math, and Mr. Bubblegum. I am knee-deep in DIY projects to keep wedding costs low but quality high for the special day when I get to marry my bestest friend.
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