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Reader Buzz: Extrovert vs. Introvert
November 7th, 2007 @ 6:26 pm by Reader Buzz
Mrs. Bee here. I was chatting with some of the bees recently about whether they were extroverts or introverts (the discussion started because I have a completely unfounded theory that most bloggers are introverts).
Here are some definitions of extroversion and introversion via about.com:
Extrovert: An extrovert is a person who is energized by being around other people. Extroverts tend to “fade” when alone and can easily become bored without other people around. When given the chance, an extrovert will talk with someone else rather than sit alone and think. In fact, extroverts tend to think as they speak, unlike introverts who are far more likely to think before they speak. Extroverts often think better when they are talking. Concepts just don’t s eem real to them unless they can talk about them; reflecting on them isn’t enough. Extroverts enjoy social situations and even seek them out since they enjoy being around people.
Introvert: Contrary to what most people think, an introvert is not simply a person who is shy. In fact, being shy has little to do with being an introvert! Shyness has an element of apprehension, nervousness and anxiety, and while an introvert may also be shy, introversion itself is not shyness. An introvert is a person who is energized by being alone and whose energy is drained by being around other people. Introverts are more concerned with the inner world of the mind. They enjoy thinking, exploring their thoughts and feelings. They often avoid social situations because being around people drains their energy. This is true even if they have good social skills. After being with people for any length of time, such as at a party, they need time alone to “recharge.”
Mr. Bee and I are both introverts. I think we’ve both become more introverted post marriage because we fulfill a large part of each other’s social needs. If either of us were an extrovert, I think we’d definitely socialize a lot more.
Are you an introvert or extrovert? What about your SO? How does the introvert/extrovert dynamic affect your relationship?
19 Responses to “Reader Buzz: Extrovert vs. Introvert”
we’re both introverts and we get along perfectly. we enjoy quiet nights at home and never worry that the other one is getting bored. at work however, my coworkers are all extroverts and sometimes i feel like i don’t belong. they’re all really great though and always include me in things which i really appreciate. being an introvert hurts in the working world because that makes me a very uncomfortable networker. i’m the prime example of someone who hides out in the bathroom for as long as i can at big events! ugh.
I have no idea what I am. I love to talk to people, but I’m not necessarily a talker. I’m more than happy to be put on the spot, but I’m nervous as heck up until that point. My job requires me to talk to all kinds of people. On the other hand, I only have two close friends and my family and my guy fill the rest of my social needs. Is there a category for somewhere in between?
Angel, & anyone else who may be interested too of course =D, here are sites where you can take tests to help you figure out “your personality type” introverted/extroverted style!
http://www.personalitypathways.com/type_inventory.html
http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes2.asp
and then for you Harry Potter fans out there, try comparing your results here:
http://piratemonkeysinc.com/allresults.htm
Disclaimer: I am not a psychologist, nor do I play one on TV, lol
i’m more of the extrovert while he’s the introvert, though i do enjoy some quiet alone time on occasion [and vice versa for him]. i think we balance each other out. during visits, he’ll put a limit to how long we go and hang out with friends just so we’ll have our own quality time together since it’s at a premium [we’re long distance so don’t get to see each other very often] which is good because when i’m out with folks i rarely know when it’s time to get going! and my wanting to be out and about gets him out and socializing as well, which is something i’m always reminding him to do.
I am an extrovert and he is an introvert. He likes that I help him go out and get out of his ruts. I like that he really thinks before speaking. Especially wonderful during arguements. On the other hand, my mouth gets me in trouble!
We’re both introverts. We’re perfectly happy to spend a night at home in each other’s company, though we like to go out and socialize as well. I like to hang out with friends and family but hate events where I don’t know anyone. I’ve become a lot more social as I’ve gotten older, but I still have that inner introvert core that enjoys being alone as well!
I’m definteily an extrovert and hes definitely an introvert. I think its great though, we bring out the best in each other. I learn to calm down and think every once in a while and I think he’s learned to be a little more comfortable around people. Sometimes it frustrates him that I would always be out and about, while he would rather be at home quietly-but thats where some compromise comes in:-)
we’re both definitely introverts. we don’t mind at all our quiet nights at home, and we’re definitely more of routine people - we go out for “lost” watching parties, regular family dinners, weekly dinner group, etc., but we’re not big on doing social stuff on a whim. our extroverted friends can’t understand how we’re happy being at home so much, but we are. 
I actually took a Meyers Briggs Test through work and found out, to the umpth degree, that I’m extroverted. Surprise! My guy is as well. I do fear, however, I’m on the edge of introvertedness. Cold weather tends to make me anitsocial as does fall television.
We’re both extroverts, but I feel like on certain occasions or in particular situations, I become a bit more introverted. I think a lot of it has to do with my comfort level in a setting — if I’m feeling out of place, the extremely shy child within me comes out and I suddenly forget how to make conversation without being a bumbling idiot. He, on the other hand, is always the life of the party, but he also recognizes when I’m feeling introverted or out of place and helps me to feel more comfortable.
When we’re both feeling particularly extroverted, though, we tend to mesh really well and have great conversations with new people. It’s just that he’s usually the one to start the conversations with strangers, and I join in later on
I’m about 60% extrovert and 40% introvert, while FI is 40% extrovert and 60% introvert. We balance each other
I think I am a little bit of both, depending on the situation. As a Leo, I am very social and love being the center of attention. In that respect, I am in extrovert. But if I am around new people, I tend to be more quiet. I am also a homebody and don’t like to go out and be social. If a social situation is already going on with people I know, I am quite the talkative person in the group.
I guess I have multiple personalities!
We took the Meyers Briggs test when we were dating and both of us are extroverts, but only by a very slight margin. It really could have gone either way. There is no doubt that the net makes me more bold.
I’m an ENFP if you were wondering.
i’m an introvert and i agree with your unfounded theory that bloggers tend to be introverted. as an introvert who blogs, its much easier for me to convey thoughts online by writing on a topic of my choice, as opposed to talking to strangers in person which i find far more difficult.
my FI is an extrovert. so when we’re in a social setting he definitely does most of the talking and i’m more quiet, but when its just us, i do most the talking.
We are both introverts. I’m extremely introverted whereas my fiance is a little closer to the extroverted side of the scale than I am. He loves to be the center of attention actually and is a natural born performer, but he’s definitely introverted despite this, because he NEEDS his alone time to recharge afterwards. I am a more typical introvert, don’t like being the center of attention and can’t think out loud - I need to think things through carefully before vocalising them. I used to be painfully shy although I am getting over this and am more social now, but I definitely need to be on my own to recharge after social evenings. And we both love to stay home and just hang out.
FI and I are both most definitely extroverts! I am 505 between ENFP and ENFJ. I love on the Harry POtter one I am apparently the same as Fred & George Weasley! LoL!
No, but it’s really great as having been with an introvert in the past, I love how FI can adapt to the situations with me. We travel well together, and can chat up with strangers all the time. We are sometimes TOO social though. And then one or both of us will reel our social lives in to take a rest and breathe. It all works out so great in the end.
I am totally and completely an extrovert. FH is a little more on the border. Basically, it works out well because I’m the entertainer and he throws in comments on whatever I’m saying, or I get him to tell a certain story.
But we do like spending time together. Luckily, my friends have told me that they like spending time with both of us.
Myers-Briggs I’m a ESFJ.
I score all-the-way introvert on all the tests, and he’s…a mathematician. (How can you tell an extroverted mathematician? He stares at your shoes.) Thus, even though it’s really not my style, I end up speaking for the couple most of the time.
Over the years, I have become more introverted, and my fiance is definitely extroverted - based on where we get our energy from.
We just had a discussion the other day about how we are leading each other’s lives. I mean that as what I do in my career, and other projects leads me to interact a lot with plenty of people. He ends up spending a lot of time at home and that doesn’t always make him very happy.
