Thanks… But… Um…
November 8th, 2007 @ 5:13 pm by Mrs. Firefly
Yesterday I received a card from a very dear friend thanking me for the lovely lasagna pan I got her for her shower. One minor problem … the gift wasn’t from me!
Let me start from the beginning. My friend is getting married in December. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to attend her wedding shower in Washington, DC last month. It was an “Around the House” shower, so we were asked to bring a gift for the kitchen or entertaining around the house, and to also bring a favorite recipe (great idea!).
If I was better organized, I would have sent a gift directly to her bridesmaid hosting the shower, but, alas, by the time I made it to the Macy’s website, I’d have to overnight the present, which was silly. Also, my friend and her fiance will be leaving the country after getting married, so I didn’t think it made sense for her to get too many pots and pans! I did email my Turkey Chili recipe in time and last week (a little late!) sent her a Victoria’s Secret gift card (for …. um … entertaining around the house).
What to do now? Should I email her? What do I say?
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14 Responses to “Thanks… But… Um…”
I agree - let her know and laugh about it 
Definitely let her know - otherwise the true gift-giver won’t receive proper thanks!
yes… you can say something like…” I got you the giftcard silly!”
Or something like “while the lasagna pan might look particularly fetching on you… I was hoping you’d find something a little more feminine at VS.” but the again, I have a particularly strange sense of humor.
LOL thistleorchid that is GREAT!
hahaha…anything with the word “fetching” has my vote.
How about “I’m so cool, I get thanked for gifts I don’t even send” and then a picture of you in shades striking a funny pose just to lighten in up.
just email her and let her know that you didn’t get her that. and tell her what you got her instead. plus, she might have just confused the gift because she received so many. maybe someone else got thanked for getting her a victoria secret gift card. =)
I agree that you should definitely let her know — as embarassed as I would be in her situation, I would much rather know so that I can correct the mistake and keep proper track of who gifted what.
Yes, let her know.
A week after my shower, my mom’s cousin handed me a gift at her son’s graduation party and said “This is from the three of us.” I assumed it was from her, her mom and her sister, since they had all been invited and there was no card. So I sent each a thank you.
Turns out she meant her, her husband and son, which I never would have know had not the mom and sister been guilted into delivering my “shower gift” from them at the wedding. 
I agree that you should let her know.
This reminds me of a relative who sent me a thank you card saying the gift was “very useful”. My guy and I gave them a day’s worth of work at their wedding and a box of gourmet chocolates. I didn’t think chocolates were exactly “useful”.
UPDATE: I emailed my friend yesterday and she was very thankful! She’s been insanely busy figuring out her move abroad, selling her condo and dealing with the wedding, of course and things got a bit confused at the shower;-)
Thanks for the update, Mrs. Firefly!
Mrs. Firefly, New York
Age and Occupation in 06: 31, Attorney
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 35, Finance
Engagement Date: April 11, 2004
Wedding Date: June, 2006
Venue: Battery Gardens
About Me: I was born in the city of Donetsk in the former Soviet Union (now the Ukraine) and grew up in Brooklyn. Many of my parent's friends are from Russia and the Ukraine as well. We want all of our guests to have a great time and hit the dance floor so we've hired a band that can play both Russian and American music; not to mention a mean rendition of the Gypsy Kings and chair-raising hora!
definitely email her. the confusion will eventually come out, and you don’t want to accept thanks for a gift you didn’t give.