Wedding Blog

Unfortunately, I think this movie might wind up hitting home. I’ve been engaged since June. My maid of honor (and best friend) is getting engaged at Christmas time (he’s already purchased the ring).

My wedding date is February 29th. Her wedding date? March 1st. I’m getting married in a rustic lodge, SHE’s getting married in a rustic lodge a little further away. I’m trying to be happy for her without throttling her.

And she’s trying to get my other bridesmaids to throw us a “joint shower”!

This didn’t exactly happen to me, but as close as it gets in real life. When we became engaged 3 months after my best friend and wanted to set a date one month before her wedding date, she explicitly told me that she would be very dissapointed and unhappy if I were to get married so close to her. Nevermind that our weddings share maybe 2-3 mutual guests and that they would be happening in different states at vastly different venus. Anyway, I graciously postponed the date and honestly haven’t felt right about it ever since.

My fiance and I have been dating for nearly 7 years — so, we didn’t want a long engagement and wanted to get married in warmer weather. I thought picking a date in different month would have avoided any jealousy, but no. So now we’ve had a 16 month engagement as a result!

It’s not important in the grand scheme of things, but still irritating.

My friend got married last Nov. in a civil ceremony. She is having a wedding for friends and family this March. I got engaged a year after her, and my wedding is in Sept. But I feel kinda like she is like keeping tabs on what I’m doing to like compare and see who’s wedding is going to be “better” ? Like asking me pricing on my vendors, and what vendors I have already, etc…

I’m hoping that this won’t happen with us. I go to a small college, with about 100 people in my class. I already know of at least 4 couples, including us, who are planning on getting married the summer after graduation. Two couples are already engaged, and DID have the same date originally. However, one of the couples found out before they told anyone their date and were able to change it without any drama.

I’m a bridesmaid in a wedding this coming June, and the bride almost had an issue with the date and our college! Because it’s a private school affiliated with a church denomination, they host a scholarship competition every summer for teens from the denomination. The school usually rents the use of the church’s sanctuary and fellowship hall to hold the music events and award ceremony in. Thankfully, the bride had set her date right after she got engaged this past summer, and the church guaranteed that the building would be hers that day. Now the only issue is parking…

My FH cousin is getting married the Saturday before us…no so dramatic, but still annoying!

[...] I guess the question is, does such a thing actually happen in real life? WeddingBee poses the questions, “Has anyone had anything like this happen to them? Or heard stories of [...]

The exact same thing happened to me as what julia just said. i announced my wedding date. my friend got engaged 2 months later and sent me an sms that the ‘earliest’ she could get married was 4 weeks before me. i had told her on the day of her engagement that i was happy for her (and i genuinely was v happy) but i demand a 2 month buffer between weddings as we are each others bridesmaids and she met her friends through me so many of the same core group are goin to both weddings. I was soo upset and i just couldnt believe she would do it to me. she later changed it to 7 weeks before mine and made it out it was for me but i know its because she wanted a saturday night rather than a friday and her fiance had a work gig close to the original date they wanted to avoid.

so although the logistics have changed- i still think i’m going to boot her because of her original intentions. she also asked me how much i was spending on my wedding and told me how much she was spending. it felt like she was turning it into a comp.

“Annoyed” - I am SO sorry for your situation. I just can’t believe that people really do exist in this world who only live to serve themselves….it’s so SAD!! Not only for the people they hurt but for THEMSELVES because they are just miserable people! I just wanted to extend my condolences and advise maybe to sit down with her and talk about the situation and ask her if there is any way this could be resolved. If she sticks with her rigid plan, THEN take action… you never know though; maybe there’s a solution that could salvage the friendship…

Same boat here! My dress was purchased, band and place booked, then my friend got engaged. I was genuinly happy for her until I caught sight of her ring, to my suprise it was the same exact as mine. She told her bf she wanted mine, but then told everyone else she liked it first, how can that be when she told me she had never see it before mine. ( she also went out and bought the same car as me after i got mine since she loved it so much, color etc the same) Not to mention she booked her wedding 3 weeks aftermine and we have the same wedding party and guests, more than half! Her family member owns the venue so money etc was not an issue as she told me her parents said she can have it whenever she wants. I brought to her attention the closeness of her date and she flipped out on me and told me I was threatened of her and I am not a good friend. Wouldnt a good friend see what she is doing, not only to me but to all invlolved. I just wish for once she could see what she is doing and not make me look the bad guy, when she is one who cant seem to do anything on her own!

Thanks Appalled- its good to hear that someone agrees its an awful thing to do. Its been months since i checked the blog. Its now 7 weeks so my wedding and there have been new developments. i got a phone call from my bridesmaid who said that things were ‘beyond repair’ and that i was just angry coz i wanted to be and that i should be happy we were both getting married and could share it together. coz it was already heading that way i said that maybe we shouldnt be in each others bridal parties because she would need to focus on her own weddings but said that i would still really want her to come to my wedding and that i would just forget how she treated me and move on. She then univited me to her wedding altogether. i proceeded to hang up on her coz i was so upset. Then she said that she didn’t want to throw away the friendship. after that conversation which ended well i dropped off a save the date to her house as a peace offering so she would know she was forgiven. i heard nothing. then i found out 4 weeks later that all my friends were invited to her hens night and not me. i couldnt believe i was so stupid to forgive the cow. now friends that she met through me are going to her wedding and i am not invited.
What has upset me the most is that only one of my friends has stood up for me. i know she has very few friends and is only inviting people she met through me to make up numbers. it upsets me so much that she has ruined this experience for me and she still gets everything her way. whats worse is that she told some of my friends at a party i left coz she was there that she missed me and it was such a shame about what happened and if i hadn’t of left she would have talked to me. its been months since my peace offering and not a single phone call or email. I know her very well and its just her way of looking like the good guy. One of my friends bought her lies and told me to ring her. i couldn’t believe it. I know friends shouldnt take sides but if you see that someone has done something awful to your friend you should say so. if it were me i would be more loyal. or if i didn’t want to take sides i would say ” look I want to be your friend but i don’t approve of what you did- maybe you should be nicer etc..”
Very hurt and upset

P.S. Appalled- on the day she got engaged i told her about keeping 8 weeks between the weddings if she had to wed before me- to cover honeymoons, hens nights,kitchen teas etc. So it was super clear from day 1 ( i must have known subconsciously she’d do it to me coz i said so on the day she got engaged which i wouldn’t mention if any other friend had got engaged). Also she went and put down the deposit before telling me what she had done so i wouldn’t be able to change it.
She is just so incredibly self absorbed its not funny. You know the type- you go clothes shopping together and they have to have you comment on their appearance for an hour on every angle of their body until you feel like tearing your hair out!

Any ideas on what i can do to get over it or give her less satidfaction for what she’s done?

WELLLLL I can beat all of this! I got engaged…..last June 2 weekd later my fiances brother and his girlfriend of 3 months announced she was pregnant! GREAT!!! She was married before and it lasted maybe 6 months before my future brother in law got her pregnant!!! FUN STUFF!!!!
So here is where it gets awesome….. our wedding is the end of July and they announced that they would get married in a civil ceremony two weeks before us and if we didnt participate they wouldn’t come to our wedding because we don’t acknoledge them!!!! I got them more gifts for tha baby than the entire familly combined. My fiance and I work hard and have some extra cash so we spoil the baby with tiffany’s baby rattle, designer clothes…..yet we are the bad people here!!!! I am sooooooo upset that I asked my mother in law to ditch rehearsal dinner plans because the thought of sitting across from the new Mr and Mrs makes me want to vomit. I have heard of one upping your friends, enemies but your own flesh and blood???? How do you envy your own flesh and blood. I didnt go my fiance had to go to keep the peace in his family! SOOOOO BE GLAD YOU ARE NOT DEALING WITH THIS TWO WEEKS BEFORE YOUR BLACK TIE AFFAIR!!!!!