I Have Bride Envy
December 14th, 2007 @ 2:01 pm by Mrs. Snow Pea
4 months later and with too much time on my hands, I have been “doubting” my wedding choices. Ridiculous, right? It’s not as though I can go back in time and redo it or change it. After looking at my own photos for weeks now and then seeing all these new brides with their GORGEOUS weddings, I began to doubt my own choices. Don’t get me wrong. I love our wedding and appreciate every bit. But we had a very different wedding from what we originally intended, which was an outdoor garden ceremony and tented reception. I can’t help but feel a slight pang everytime I see a lovely natural outdoor reception.
Did you have the post-wedding blues? Did you see something that made you wish you had done something differently?
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21 Responses to “I Have Bride Envy”
Hey Snow Pea — I could sense this in your email to me. Don’t doubt yourself — you had a beautiful wedding. Your dramatic cathedral images and video are sure to stand the test of time! Girls with straight hair want curly hair and girls with big weddings want small weddings! You always want what you didn’t have.
Enjoy the great parts of your day and know the most important part is you married the man you love who will be your partner forever.
that’s good encouragement for me too, mrs onion~! i’m not even married yet and after looking at some of my diy aspects, i’m already changing my mind and it’s too late to do anything about it~! problem is that there are just too many good ideas out there and i like them all~! it’s so hard to choose just one thing.
i feel the same way - I think mr. gb is going to veto me getting the new ms weddings if I tell him that, though.
look forward to your future garden and decorating your house…. in sf. 
Oh me too! I couldnt watch wedding shows for the first two months or so after the wedding. I don’t dare open up a wedding magazine for the fear I will see something that I missed out on.
oh hell yea, all throughout the honeymoon, i’d think of this and that, and i’d consciously have to stop myself from thinking about it. when we got home, i got a little depressed about the little mishaps/inadequacies. i told my husband “tell me to stop fretting about things i can’t change”. and he told me, “stop fretting about things that were WONDERFUL!” so that’s what i’ll say to you mrs. snowpea (esp cuz i totally wish i was more like you in your wedding organization!): stop fretting about your wedding which was absolutely WONDERFUL!”
Oh gosh, I’ve felt the same way. After three months of marriage, I still want to go back and change things. But, the past is the past. You had a wonderful and beautiful wedding, I had a wonderful and beautiful wedding, all is in the past. Just keep looking at your wedding pictures to see the big smile on your face!
Yup. Frequently! I should’ve spent more time on the cake, videographer, hairstyle practice… list goes on. Though I think about it still sometimes, it’s usually only for a few seconds, then I realize that we really did have an amazing day and that’s really all I care about!
I was lucky and got to have two (tiny) weddings, so that left me with few regrets about the actual days, but I keep telling Mr benachar that since our pets weren’t involved in either of the first two we need to have one more wedding for them!
Aww, Miss Snow Pea– your wedding was completely gorgeous!!! That being said, I think your feelings are completely natural. Who doesn’t wonder how things could have been differently? I think when you start feeling down about it, you should just take a look at all your amazing wedding pictures. Your wedding was so breathtaking!
oh i totally feel that way. i wish that we chose a prettier venue, one without pillars everywhere. sometimes i wish we got married in the city so we could have some cool city pictures. but if it’s any consolation, i have bride envy over YOUR wedding! 
it was GORGEOUS.
I TOTALLY get that feeling! Sometimes I don’t want to see pictures of certain expensive weddings because I feel a pang of jealousy. I especially feel that way when I see other people’s flowers because I really didn’t like mine!
However, I’m in the same boat as Mrs. Eggplant — I’m sure there are so many things in YOUR wedding that other people envy! hehe… I guess the grass is greener on the other side! Don’t worry, your wedding was GORGEOUS!
Yes- It has been three months since our wedding and I keep thinking that I would / could have had a better wedding had I waited for an open date at my dream venue, photographer. I spent $4,500 on my dress and every once in a while I see a dress and think “I could have worn that.”
I know my wedding was fabulous- but I can’t shake the feeling.
Oh Snow Pea… the grass is always greener… but I completely understand!! I have the same thoughts myself sometimes. “Oh, I wish we had done _____”. Or “I wish we had hired ______”
But your wedding was fan-freakin-tastic!! =)
oh my goodness, I definitely feel that way! And yet, I’m addicted to weddingbee, so I keep looking at all your amazing weddings and just making it worse
A little bit, but then I remind myself that hindsight is 20/20. My regrets are mainly about compromises here and there, but it was very us, and having a celebration (as opposed to eloping) made our families happy.
I really do wish that I had skipped the getting ready photos, though. I could have used that time to myself (or just with my girls) and I felt like the photog was in my face.
My biggest regret is not discovering Weddingbee until after my wedding!!! I love our day - but there are definitely some ideas I’ve since heard about that for sure would have been part of our day. Like the Candy Buffet! Also I’m so impressed with everyone’s thank-you cards!
When I see photos of goregous weddings, I just think “wow, that’s beautiful…I’m so glad to be done!” Ha. Mostly they just inspire me for all the dinner parties we’ll get to host someday.
Jilian, I’m with you. I was the first of my peers to get married, really, and now that everyone I know is getting married and I’m hearing their ideas and seeing the amazing stuff on Weddingbee, I feel regrets: I procrastinated on the bridesmaids dresses, and didn’t think about the ceremony music as much as I should have, and we really should have gotten pictures on that awesome staircase…
but then, I just had a super-fun weekend with the hubs, and we’re getting geared up for Christmas, and our marriage seems to get better all the time. So I need to stop the regrets and notice how big our smiles are in all the wedding pictures.
NO day is perfect. But my wedding day still got pretty darn close, and that should be good enough.
I’m so happy other ladies struggled with this! I was so bummed I couldn’t look at wedding ideas for several months after. It physically hurt.
Wow this post struck a chord with me. Thank you Mrs. Snow Pea for bravely bringing up a sensitive subject. Two months after our wedding and I still play the “what if” game, like What if I had worn a different dress? What if I had worn different shoes? Why did I have such an ugly hanger for my wedding dress? I noted these and will pass them on to my cousin, who’s getting married in August. Maybe that will ease the doubts but it’s difficult. You can never have the perfect wedding–something is always bound to go wrong and that it the joy, and sometimes pain of it all.
Mrs. Snow Pea, New York
Age and Occupation: 26, Architectural Engineer and student
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Web Designer
Engagement Date: July 4, 2005
Wedding Date: August 18, 2007
About Me: I am a DIY gal. From cooking, home improvements to wedding. Mr. Snow Pea and I met in college, and since then we've been like peas and carrots! Love cooking, traveling, and fishing.
Yeah, I wish I would have been able to have our ceremony outdoors….rain is rain and I couldn’t fight that, but any back up plan just wasn’t as cool as being barefoot in the grass like I wanted.
Researched more for my must take list for the photographer….I didn’t really care at the time and it was one less thing I had to stress about, but looking back we didn’t get a shot of the rings by themselves.
Oh, and I would have purchased a nice wooden hanger instead of that cheap plastic one that’s in the photos.
Silly, but yeah I feel you.