Newer blog post
more in Blog
Older blog post
Newer blog post by Mrs. Cupcake
more by Mrs. Cupcake (oldest)
Older blog post by Mrs. Cupcake
Mrs. Cupcake's Picture
Mrs. Cupcake, Philadelphia Age and Occupation: 27, Graphic Designer Fiance's Age and Occupation: 29, Construction Project Manager Engagement Date: February 10, 2007 Wedding Date: September, 2008 Blogging Since: December 7, 2007 Venue: The Desmond Hotel in Malvern, PA About Me: Mr. Cupcake and I hit it off at a Halloween party and immediately began a long-distance relationship. After two years, he moved to my neck of the woods, and a year and a half after that, he proposed at the “place we fell in love.” I am a true perfectionist who enjoys designing and creating more work for myself, so wedding planning is my perfect outlet. Mr. Cupcake and I are both old souls, and we hope to weave that aspect of our personalities into our wedding day.
About Mrs. Cupcake

The Times, They Are A-Changin’

December 20th, 2007 @ 10:24 am by Mrs. Cupcake

Over the summer, I received invitations to four weddings. Three out of the four invitations had envelopes that were fed through a home printer with guests’ addresses. Although I have seen many etiquette sources that forbid this practice, it made me wonder: should etiquette rules be revised and adjusted as the times change?

The argument is that printed envelopes are not as personal as hand-written or calligraphered (calligraphed? calligraphied? I have no clue) ones. But realistically, feeding envelopes through a printer after inputting all of the addresses is not exactly effortless or quick; there is still time involved in personalizing things for each guest. And, it can actually look nice (not to mention it’s ideal for budget-conscious brides who have chicken-scratch handwriting, like me). So, where lies the problem? Is there a problem, or are many etiquette rules just outdated and, consequently, ignored?

Are the queens and kings of etiquette just too stubborn to consider updating the “rules” due to technological advancements? What other etiquette rules do you find outdated, or worthy of ignoring?

Tags: etiquette, invitations, philadelphia |
advertisement below
Newer blog post
more in Blog
Older blog post
Newer blog post by Mrs. Cupcake
more by Mrs. Cupcake (oldest)
Older blog post by Mrs. Cupcake

53 Responses to “The Times, They Are A-Changin’”

1 2 3 

1.
Guest Icon
Guest
crispet1

I am glad I wont have much resistance in this area (or others where etiquette is of paramount concern), as parents on both sides had very practical weddings. Thankfully I dont think I will be forced into calligraphy or anything else I think I can skimp on in order to save some money.

After all, with the availability of font styles, using a printer looks pretty darn good!

 
2.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Dahlia (message)  413 posts, Helper bee

Excellent question- we’re in the same boat. I’ve always thought that you needed to hand address them, but they look so.much.nicer if we put them through the printer.

We did a test run with Christmas cards, and liked how they turned out. I’m interested to hear what everyone else has to say about this.

 
3.
Guest Icon
Guest
evelyn

Thanks for addressing this issue, I haven’t quite begun to address the full extent of stationary. But…I am in the same boat as you, except for that we were actually considering clear labels???? My FI writes like a Dr and I’m not too far from it, wouldn’t a cute fancy font be nicer in the long run that chicken scratch??

Hmmm now I’m thinking about my options.

 
4.
Member Icon
Member
maverika (message)  66 posts, Worker bee

We picked a unique font that we used throughout the wedding stuff and printed them in color on ivory envelopes. I personally think ettiquette makes sense when it comes to avoiding people’s feelings but when it is impractical and just wonky I sat forget about it! Plus, my handwriting is pretty much illegible!

 
5.
Member Icon
Member
maverika (message)  66 posts, Worker bee

I meant to say “avoiding hurting people’s feelings.” Oops!

 
6.
Guest Icon
Guest
e

i went to 7 weddings last year and didn’t get a single hand calligraphy invitation. i think running them through a printer looks great. and actually, half of those invitations i got were printed onto labels and then stuck onto the envelope, which doesn’t look as good as printing straight onto the envelope, but is less time consuming. i think they could rewrite some of the etiquette rules to conform to the times. definitely nothing wrong with hand calligraphy (especially professionally done~! i LOVE it..), but not everyone can afford it and printing it looks good too~! we went the printing route..i attempted to do some hand calligraphy (my hand writing’s nice)..but decided it actually looked better printed in my opinion (i’m no professional)

 
7.
Guest Icon
Guest
nds24

I’m guilty of sending out printed envelopes. When I sent out our newsletter we printed all the addresses. I was going to do the same for our invites but the d@mn printer kept jamming so I had to handwritten all of them.

I just don’t have the budget for a calligrapher.

I think it’s alright. This is definitely one of the rules that are okay to skip.

I’m also guilty of indicating # of guests invited / seats reserved on the RSVPs.

 
8.
Member Icon
Member
missvanilla (message)  16 posts, Newbee

I was actually thinking on the same lines of Evelyn… I received an invitation with clear labels and thought it looked pretty. I was thinking of doing this, or putting the envelopes through the printer. While I think that the calligraphy is a nice touch, I don’t necessarily think that its a necessity - and I’m almost positive my friends won’t think twice of it. Am I wrong in going this route?

 
9.
Guest Icon
Guest
Jen

We both write in all caps most of the time so our handwriting is terrible! I did the decorative wrap around labels that I printed out at home. I got more compliments on the labels than I did on the DIY invites that I spent hours stressing over. So I guess our guests are too hung up on etiquette either :)

 
10.
Bee Icon
Bee
Miss Flamingo (message)  1,366 posts, Bumble bee

This is a good question… about the whole printing on the envelopes … I find it to be prettier… a clean and perfect look. Times changed.. and I think some etiquette rules can be bended… ill think about it and come back ;)

 
11.
Guest Icon
Guest
BaghdadBride

Well originally etiquette wise the envelopes were supposed to be hand addressed by the BRIDE. It’s the personal touch that is supposed to be the important thing. So everyone who farms the work out to a calligrapher is still missing out on the “personal” aspect of things.

I’d say as long as it looks nice then go right ahead and print. Personally the only reason I’d go to a calligrapher is so that I don’t have to handwrite all those names/addresses. I did it for the STDs and it was a hassle.

Etiquette definitley needs to change with the times.

 
12.
Guest Icon
Guest
SoireeLaura

We fed ours through the printer too! I thought they looked pretty darn spiffy.

 
13.
Member Icon
Member
chill (message)  244 posts, Helper bee

If the printed addresses are done tastefully, then there is nothing wrong with it. To be quite frank, the envelope doesn’t really matter, because it’s really what’s inside that counts! I was researching calligraphers for a client of mine, and many actually offering printing! So, not it’s not in poor etiquette, not anymore these days.

 
14.
Member Icon
Member
kleverkira (message)  331 posts, Helper bee

We recently finished hand-addressing all of our save-the-dates, which actually took a lot less time than I thought it would. Since both FH and I have nice handwriting, we just sat down and did them together. I haven’t thought about the invitations yet. We’ll probably hand-address them, but I certainly don’t see anything wrong with putting them through the printer.

 
15.
Guest Icon
Guest
Bonnie

We’re using clear labels (GASP!!!). :-) I tested it out on the save the dates and it looked good. We’re using a very specific font and color scheme so carrying that over to the addresses looks a LOT better than anything I could do by hand. We’re working on a tight budget and with the casual, comfrotable wedding we’re having, professional caligraphy would look really out of place. I see this sort of etiquette as a guide but not a rule. For instance to convey the casualness of the event we’re using only lowercase letters. It looks really good and is very fitting.

 
16.
Angel
Member
Angel (message)  1,263 posts, Bumble bee

There’s always been a tug of war with etiquette and what actually happens. At one point in our history, parents were aghast if their child’s wedding was photographed for the local newspaper. Now we have photographers dedicated to weddings. And response cards? Big old fashioned no-no. It’s supposed to be a hand written response. So etiquette is definitely changeable. Thank goodness!

 
17.
Guest Icon
Guest
Miss History

For my sister’s we fed envelopes through the printer and except for a smudge here or there they looked amazing. For me, I have neither the time or money to devote to calligraphy and even if I did I would not spend it on that as truth be told I dislike calligraphy…I know GASP! :)

 
18.
Guest Icon
Guest
AMK

A hand-addresses envelope can be beautiful…but I’m still going to throw it away a few seconds after I open it!

Unless you have great penmanship and enjoy addressing the envelopes by hand, save yourself the time (or the money, if you were going to pay someone else to do it).

 
19.
Guest Icon
Guest
evelyn

yeah! labels seem to be ok. i’m breathing a bit easier! Thanks Bonnie!

Oh and my computer can insure that I don’t misspell someone’s name in the translation process or flip one of those numbers in the addy! *that is if the FI typed them in correctly.

So..Miss Cupcake I think you’re good to go printing directly on your envelopes!

 
20.
Guest Icon
Guest
knw

Call me old fashioned, but I love the look of a hand-addressed envelope and am kind of disappointed when I receive one that’s been printed. I’m just one of those gals who loves and appreciates hand-written things. That’s just me, though! And yes, it is a long and tedious process to hand-address them, but my husband and I watched all of the Rocky movies while I addressed and he stuffed, sealed and stamped (it’s the price I had to pay…)

 
1 2 3 

Leave a Reply


You can also just...

Newer blog post
more in Blog
Older blog post
Newer blog post by Mrs. Cupcake
more by Mrs. Cupcake (oldest)
Older blog post by Mrs. Cupcake

Visit our sister sites eHarmony
Online Dating
eHarmony Advice
Dating Advice
Project Wedding
Wedding Songs
JustMommies
Pregnancy Calendar

Copyright 2004-2012, Weddingbee.com
 

Find your vendors on Weddingbee

Real reviews from brides in your area!

Favors by Weddingbee

  • Favors by season

Shop Now »

Mrs. Cupcake
Mrs. Cupcake

Mrs. Cupcake, Philadelphia Age and Occupation: 27, Graphic Designer Fiance's Age and Occupation: 29, Construction Project Manager Engagement Date: February 10, 2007 Wedding Date: September, 2008 Blogging Since: December 7, 2007 Venue: The Desmond Hotel in Malvern, PA About Me: Mr. Cupcake and I hit it off at a Halloween party and immediately began a long-distance relationship. After two years, he moved to my neck of the woods, and a year and a half after that, he proposed at the “place we fell in love.” I am a true perfectionist who enjoys designing and creating more work for myself, so wedding planning is my perfect outlet. Mr. Cupcake and I are both old souls, and we hope to weave that aspect of our personalities into our wedding day.

Boards
Classifieds

Blog Calendar
February 2012
SunMonTueWedThuFriSat
2930311234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
26272829

Weddingbee Bios
Wiki
More