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Beehive Feature Launched: Aug 31, 2006 About: A forum for readers to post questions and get feedback from the hive, aka the weddingbee community.
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Hot Thread: My Two Dads

January 9th, 2008 @ 3:41 pm by Beehive

Need some advice, ladies.  My parents divorced when I was 5, and my mom remarried when I was 8.  I have always had a good relationship with my Dad, but technically I have spent more time with my step-father, being that I lived with my mom growing up.  My step-dad and I have an OK relationship, but there have been some ups and downs.

Hot topic is: who walks me down the aisle?  If I’m being completely honest, I want my dad to walk me.  I LOVE my dad, and this is how I have always imagined it.  My step dad and I do not have the same “love”, in fact, I have never called him “dad” and we have never exchanged “I love yous”.  It never felt appropriate.  My dad is not jealous, and I know he would never say so, but I feel that deep down he does not want to share this job with anyone.

How do I deal with the fallout with my mom and step dad?  My mom has been harping on “alternative” weddings for years (even before I was engaged) basically assuming that both would walk me down the aisle.  I have never told her that I would do this.  I feel more so than my step dad, my mom’s feelings will be hurt if her husband does not walk me down the aisle.  I think my mom has always wanted me and my step dad to be closer.  It just never happened.

Is there a way that I can honor my step dad without having him walk me?  Is there any comparable alternative?  I thought maybe I’d have 2 father daughter dances (will this bore my guests?) or maybe have my step dad do a reading during the ceremony.  I stress about this 24/7.  Basically, I don’t want to hurt anyone, but I feel like I should be happy, too.  Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

katiethelady

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