26 Letters, All Of Them Mine
January 16th, 2008 @ 5:29 pm by Mrs. Lovebug
I like words. They’re my special friends, and I like to play with them. Which is why at age eight I was submitting sniglets to Not Necessarily The News. Which is also why it’s going to be hard for me to marry Mr. Lovebug while Demetri Martin is still single.
Anyway, I coined some new wedding terminology. Because I’m a nerd like that.
tulle shed
-noun
an imaginary storage facility for outdated or démodé wedding traditions and trappings
Environmentalists and animal rights activists agree: the custom of releasing doves needs to be put in the tulle shed.
vendor bender
-noun
a series of several wedding planning appointments, especially within a small time frame
Between my meetings with the florist, the photographer, and the caterer, I’m going on a real vendor bender this week.
honeymoon sweet
-noun
an article of clothing purchased specifically for the honeymoon; lingerie
I picked up the hottest little honeymoon sweet this week at the Victoria’s Secret Semi-Annual!
FMIL-iarity
-noun
when a future mother-in-law feels comfortable enough with the bride to voice strong, often opposing opinions regarding wedding planning details
FMIL-iarity breeds contempt.
Whatever you do, don’t encourage me. Because I could go on ad infinitum…
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15 Responses to “26 Letters, All Of Them Mine”
I like words too! So I got a huge kick out of this post. I think it’s so cool that you’ve woven this aspect of your personality into your wedding theme too. Feel free to share more new wedding terminology anytime. 
hilarious! thanks for the laugh!
Oh but I simply MUST encourage you. Especially if you have any other winners in that head of yours like “FMIL-iarity breeds contempt.” I think I snorted out loud when I read that one.
Come to think of it, maybe I shouldn’t encourage you. My coworkers will think there’s something wrong with me if I sit at my desk and snort with laughter.
I love Demetri Martin… seriously. I met him in person and made a fool of myself. I make my friends go see him with me when he performs in NYC so they can stop me from being foolish!
i’m hereby encouraging!!
dress rehearsal
-noun
a wedding dress you buy that eventually inspires regret and the subsequent purchase of another
makeup trial
-noun
sitting in a salon for 1.5 hours only to emerge looking like a $2 hooker.
piercing the corporate veil
-noun
when your clumsy aunt steps on the precious alencon lace-trimmed family heirloom with her spiked Manolos
Yeah, I come from word-obsessed stock too. My father always writes funny (and punny) toast poems for every family wedding.
Officially too cool for me. Cannot find words for comment, for fear of inferiority to Miss L.
So funny! have you ever read the “Word Fugitive” section in The Atlantic Monthly? I think it would be right up your alley. Maybe the author could use this list for a special edition.
beanchar: ha! love it. especially “piercing the corporate veil” - sounds like there’s a great story there.
nyc_kim: you met my hero/crush?! I’m so jealous! I’d surely make a fool of myself as well. I’d probably rush to find a pen and pad and try to impress him with artistic stuff.
I did meet him- and I heard this morning he is signing a book deal! Perhaps you should add that to your registry!?
[...] maximum vendor-visiting potential. (I believe it was Miss Lovebug who coined the appropriate term vendor bender.) I really wouldn’t have it any other way though- I can’t imagine getting married anywhere but [...]
Mrs. Lovebug, Tucson
Age and Occupation in 06: 31, Writer
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 27, Professional Game Show Contestant
Engagement Date: February 18, 2007
Wedding Date: April 19, 2008
Venue: Historic Inn
About Me: Likes: blogging, wikis, semi-colons, cuddling, fragrant flowers, syntax, and spooning. Dislikes: typos, dangling modifiers, flypaper, citronella candles, and run-ons. If I had my druthers, I'd exchange simple vows in a candlelit library. But I lost my druthers long ago...anyone seen them?
Hahaha…you crack me up. As my friend would say, this is all cheese and corn (as in cheesy and corny), and of course, I’m loving it.
But um, not encourage…because you know. That would be bad.