I’ve mentioned before that we’ll be having a traditional Chinese banquet for our reception, but I’ve never explained how we came to that decision. Nowadays, banquets (at least as the main reception) among American-born Asians seem to be increasingly less popular - and I can understand why.
So, why are we having a Chinese banquet? Your first guess would probably be – “That’s what your parents want.”
And, you’d be partially right. My parents, who emigrated from Hong Kong, obviously wanted their daughter to uphold tradition, and so on and so forth. They asked us to consider it, but in the end it has always been our decision.
So, here is our list of reasons why we chose the banquet:
So, I’m interested. What was the biggest factor(s) for picking your wedding venue(s)? Was it cost? The look? Culture? A combo of reasons?
We had charts. We had lists of pros and cons first for countries, then states, then cities, then actual sites…
I think cost and personality were the driving factors. We wanted it to fit us, and not gouge us.
We do it because the chinese and vietnamese will not acknowledge that the bride and groom are married unless there is a banquet. My cousin did not have a banquet until a year after her wedding. During that time, his family and her family ignored them because they were “not married”
Old fashioned Traditions.
We also had charts, and sought out a good location/food for a certain price. In the end, location beat price- but we’ve cut back in other ways.
We argued a lot about where to have the wedding…mostly geographical. Because of the large number of elderly relatives on my side that wouldn’t or couldn’t travel the lack there of on his side we chose my home town. We also chose my home town for the rural setting. We had discussed places in between where we live (his hometown) and my hometown as well as his hometown. In choosing to have our wedding in a rural area we limited a lot of our choices and have also chosen to have the wedding outside because fo the amazing views and the closeness we feel to my family’s land.
the major driving force was location. it was either in nyc (where we have lived for the last 5 years) or california (where his family is). in the end, it was less painful to have 15 ppl to fly east versus all of our friends flying west. after we figured out geographic location, it came down to venue pricing.
It came down to cost and general aesthetic for us. We live in a big city, but found that if we traveled outside city limits the price tags came down significantly. We also have a lot of out-of-towners and the ‘burbs are a little less intimdating than a big city (parking-wise, lodging-wise, and just overall getting around). So I guess convenience fit in there too!
I was in the EXACT same boat as you, and our wedding turned out great. We had a beautiful Catholic church wedding, followed by a Chinese banquet (which I tried to modernize). A combo of both our cultures was what it came down to. You can see final photos in my bio. We also had dancing and a full open bar at our banquet and it turned out awesome. Good luck and have fun!
I’m actually debating between China Pearl Restaurant and Jin Asian as well. I love the convenience of Chinatown but hate the look. *sigh* why can’t they just have a pretty place in Chinatown?
We chose our local country club for multiple reasons. First of all because we love it; second because we love the staff - we know them all, and they are super accomodating and interested in all our plans; third because they will close the whole clubhouse for us (totally private event); fourth because it already has fabulous decor; and fifth because although I wanted an indoor event I also wanted easy access for us and the guests to really nice outdoor areas, and it has great lawns and balconies.
Well, back before my situations, it was “because this is what my parents will pay for and they won’t ask for any contributions from us.” 
@Miss Penguin: I like banana… it’s more white inside 
@Cathy: Funny! We were choosing between the same two restaurants! We chose Jin (obviously) because it’s just so much prettier.
I think most Asian Americans have the same thinking when it comes to whether to have an Americanized wedding reception or an Asian banquet. The only thing I love about Chinese receptions are the food! You get so much more for what you pay for. I really look forward to what you have planned to modernize it.
I think we’re going with the double reception — a more casual daytime affair (which fulfills my dreams and vision), and then a banquet at night, to respect my mother and tradition. We live down the street from a decent looking Chinese restaurant and my mother has some sort of clout in the restaurant circles so we’re going to rent the place out and then she’ll hopefully barter some fair prices =). I never even considered going with the banquet route, but the more we got into planning, the more my mother wanted to do it…plus I have a lot of relatives flying in from HK so I know they’ll appreciate the traditional setup!
we’re doing our reception chinese banquet style also. for me it was a no-brainer. i had briefly entertained the idea of having an american style reception, but COST and FOOD were priority- our families prefer chinese food AND you also get a better value. sure its not as fancy shmancy with decor but i’m ok with that too.
and culture has a pretty big factor too, because that’s how they do it ‘back home’ and i wanted to honor my parents traditions.
Mrs. Toucan, Boston
Age and Occupation: 25, Full-time Research Assistant, Part-time Graduate Student
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 25, Actuary
Engagement Date: February 18, 2007
Wedding Date: June 7, 2008
Blogging Since: November 07, 2007
Venue: St. Catherine of Genoa, Jin Asian Cuisine Restaurant
About Me: I’m a Gemini to the extreme. On one side, I’m a girly girl. I read countless bridal and fashion magazines, and have an obsession with keeping up with the latest Hollywood gossip. On the other side, I’m a sports fanatic. Despite being a full-time bride-to be, full-time research assistant, and part-time student, I’m also a full-time Red Sox fan from spring training to October, and a full-time Patriots fan from mini-camp to February. I devote almost as much time researching my for fantasy football team as researching for our wedding!
You Banana! I prefer the term “twinkie”!!!
My white girlfriend is obsessed with asian things and we call her the “egg”
Our biggest factor for choosing our venue was PRIVACY. We wanted a place that was soley for us, no one else. That meant a rented out restaurant or estate…and eventually we went winery. I dont want ANYONE else in the world seeing us except our guests
I’m shy like that hee hee!