Wedding Blog
Traditionally, the Chinese bride wears 3 (or 4) dresses on her wedding day. The first is the traditional white wedding dress which is worn during the ceremony. The second dress is the traditional Chinese wedding dress, or qipao, which is worn throughout banquet/reception, and the third dress is the going away dress (usually a ball gown), which is worn just before leaving the banquet. (When a bride wears 4 dresses, usually another dress (perhaps a kwa/cheongsam) is worn during the tea ceremony or for part of the banquet.
Originally, I thought I had all my outfits for our wedding planned. White wedding dress - Check! Qipao - Check! And, I thought that this would count as my third outfit:
I originally planned on wearing this kwa during my tea ceremony and cocktail hour, until my dad found out my plans. Apparently, this “doesn’t count” as one of the “outfits” because I wasn’t planning on wearing it during the banquet. So, Daddy Toucan said that I only had 2 dresses, and that I NEEDED another one “to say bye to people in.”I mentioned before, that I had a particular affinity for shopping for dresses and shoes, and here I was given a great excuse to go shopping - “Daddy said I needed a new dress.” 
So, I went out and bought this:
Er… Mr. Toucan and I went a little crazy with our fashion shoot.
What do you think? Like I said above, this last dress is usually a ball gown, but I didn’t really want to buy another dress that I’d only wear once. Additionally, even though it’s my “end-of-the-evening dress,” it really won’t be the end of my evening. Most likely I’d change into this dress when I expect the first of the guests to leave (older relatives and those with children will probably leave after dinner). I think that a lot of the guests will stay and dance, and I wanted to wear something that would allow me to shimmy and shake!I think my only concern with the dress is that it might be too casual.
What do you think? Do you think this dress will be good for the end of the night? Or do you think this dress would be better used the following day at our farewell barbecue?
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I think it is gorgeous and amazing and perfect for the end of the evening. I am very jealous and I want it!
I think that your dress is super cute, and absolutely perfect to wear.
It’s perfect! I wore a short shift dress as my dress #2.
Plus, it looks like the other dressed might be tricky to get in and out of - this one, you can just thrown on like a t-shirt.
I love it! It’s cute and fun and still “bridal” b/c it’s white. It’s a keeper… as long as Daddy Toucan is okay with it not being a ballgown.
Hmmm have you run this by your Dad yet? He might say that you need one of those big pouffy pink dresses.
I have my white dress for ceremony, my lia for evening, the qua for tea ceremony and my farewell dress is the cheong sam.
@beanchar and Jenny: Daddy Toucan hasn’t decided yet. He says, “might be okay.” He wants to ask my big aunt to see what she thinks… but for now, it’s okay.
Oh it’s so cute! I plan on wearing a short dress to see guests off too. I don’t think you need the requisite ball gown. Plus it’ll be easier to dash off to a fun after-party in a short dress than a long one.
Hello, I’m a representative for Wedding Dress Models, Inc., and I have to say, I am VERY impressed with what I see. You show great versatility. I particularly like the “kick the heels up” pose, and I’m wondering if you can reproduce that? Say, under immense pressure and with no lunch?
Get back to me.
i think it’s cute and great for dancing, but it might be a little too casual. i think you could still go for short and cute, but something that stands out more since you’re the bride. i don’t know about you, but after the change, it’s like an unveiling. the dj makes an announcement and introduces the bride and groom again. at least that’s what i’m doing. it depends on what you want though.
Absolutely LOVE the dress!!……however, I have to agree with Joanne that it may be a bit too casual. After all, you don’t want to be dressed less formal than your bridal party and others in your “goodbye” line at the door…..or worse, be mistaken as one of the guests. Farewell BBQ would be perfect - just watch the BBQ sauce.
its cute but i think it’s better for the rehearsal or bbq as you mentioned.
also agree w/joanne, red & ocbride…very stylish dress but since you’re the bride and will be center of attention, maybe go for something a bit more fancier?
You look very cute but I also think it’s too casual for a Chinese banquet. It’d be perfect for the BBQ though!
You will have yourself all done up and looking gorgeous, some fabulous shoes on your feet, no way anyone in that room will say that you don’t look perfect for the end of the night.
Of course I am not Chinese or that familiar with Chinese culture so if it will be off-putting to some of your guests maybe you should go with something a little fancier i.e. longer.
Oh god, I was in the same situation a while ago w/my mom! I ended up renting a formal gown. I like your dress but I’m not sure how your “aunt” will react. I think traditionally, the evening gown is a bit more showy. Good luck!
WAY too casual for a Chinese banquet. It’s also quite shapeless to be formal enough. I agree with above, save it for a BBQ and keep looking.
you can be simple and elegant but that dress is waaaaaay too simple for your wedding. also, its not flattering at all.
Awww…I thought that last comment was a little harsh. It is flattering and SUPER CUTE!! It may be a tad casual, though. BBQ, maybe? But it is ADORABLE!!!
to me, the dress says 1950s chic. you look adorable! i love the sleeves.
I just wanted to say that you have hot legs If not to the reception, you have to wear that dress somewhere!
cute dress! but personally i think it’d be better for a less formal event. a lot of asian guests go ALL out at chinese receptions and if your guests will be decked out in glittery and long gowns, you may look mismatched if they ask you to take a pic at the end of the night.
BUTTTTT its totally up to you (and the ‘aunties’) lol. i know how that is!
So CUTE and it looks great on you!! You definitely have some hot legs
I think maybe it would work best for your farewell BBQ, though. But I think you should go with something knee-length for your reception dress for sure.
I have to disagree with those who think the dress is too casual for a Chinese wedding reception. I’ve been to tons and there is no way I would think it is not formal enough! It is classic and chic and sophisticated.
And did somebody really say it wasn’t flattering? Wow. I think somebody needs glasses and a few etiquette lessons.
P.S. Any chance you will tell us the brand name and where you found it?
Thanks ladies, for all your input. I think I’ll definitely keep my eyes peeled for another dress, and keep this one as a backup and next day dress.
@Go Amie: The dress is by ABS, and I found it on the clearance rack at Macy’s. I’ve also seen it at Lord and Taylor, but it was full price there.
Cute for the BBQ…maybe you could get a more formal short dress for end of the evening?
[...] while ago, I asked the Hive’s opinion on a dress for the end of the night. As I mentioned then, it is customary for Chinese brides to wear multiple dresses on her wedding day - the traditional [...]
I’ve been looking for a kwa for my wedding - would you mind telling me where you found yours? Rental or purchase? Thanks.
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Mrs. Toucan, Boston
Age and Occupation: 25, Full-time Research Assistant, Part-time Graduate Student
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 25, Actuary
Engagement Date: February 18, 2007
Wedding Date: June 7, 2008
Blogging Since: November 07, 2007
Venue: St. Catherine of Genoa, Jin Asian Cuisine Restaurant
About Me: I’m a Gemini to the extreme. On one side, I’m a girly girl. I read countless bridal and fashion magazines, and have an obsession with keeping up with the latest Hollywood gossip. On the other side, I’m a sports fanatic. Despite being a full-time bride-to be, full-time research assistant, and part-time student, I’m also a full-time Red Sox fan from spring training to October, and a full-time Patriots fan from mini-camp to February. I devote almost as much time researching my for fantasy football team as researching for our wedding!
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