Wedding Blog
There is a scene in Sex and the City where Charlotte is preparing Shabbas dinner with Miranda and Carrie. Miranda warns Charlotte not to be overeager about her future with Harry. Charlotte passionately replies, “It’s beshert! It’s meant to be!”
Beshert is a Yiddish word that means destiny. It’s often used in the context of a soulmate. The romantic in me connects with the idea that love is pre-destined; written in the stars. When I think of the special couples I know and the wonderful, random ways in which they met, I always wonder if it was somehow part of a bigger plan and if that love was truly meant to be. Mr. Jasmine and I met in law school– not a particularly unusual way to meet. But we both chose the same law school— far from home and for unusual reasons. I often wonder if we were meant to meet there. If it was somehow pre-ordained that we would attend the same school, fall in love, and share a life together. It’s a beautiful, magical idea.
But the practical side of me acknowledges that in many ways, Mr. Jasmine and I chose to be together. And we make that choice every day in our relationship. Through the blissful times and the awful ones, we continually choose each other and our life together. And there is something beautiful and meaningful about affirmatively making that choice every day.
What are your thoughts on soulmates vs. choosing your mate?
image courtesy of perfect bound. isn’t charlotte the most beautiful bride?
|
Share this post: Meant To Bee
Maybe its a little bit of both. FI and I believe that we are soulmates because there have been so many times that things have been tough and we could have “missed” each other and through our hard work, choices and I think a little fate its worked out.
I LOVE Charlotte’s wedding dress. I really wanted one just like it. 
I really like to believe that noting is pre-ordained. I think it is so much more meaningful that we choose to be with each other through all those horrible and great times.
I alluded to this idea in what I will be reading during our ceremony. As Miss Jasmine mentioned, when such a strange series of choices led you to one another it’s hard to believe it wasn’t meant to be. It’s not like “our parents set us up” or “we ran into each other at the market.”
love charlotte and harry’s wedding <3 When we first got engaged I went back and watched all of the SITC wedding episodes.
Someone told me that you grow into being soulmates. Yes, there could be a level of predestination, but ultimately, you two are the ones to choose to love eachother, and as you mentioned, it’s a daily choice. I like the idea that the trust just keeps building to where you can’t picture your life without the other (yet still maintain your identity).
I think so many marriages end prematurely because one or both parties don’t CHOOSE to love–it’s not a matter of there being only one person in the universe for them and if they get it wrong, they should just divorce. It’s that they don’t choose to get through the hard times on their promise to one another.
What a serious undertaking (albeit awfully joyous from what I hear) marriage is!
*step down off of soap box*
Maybe there was fate involved when FI and I met… it certainly was a chance encounter. However I strongly believe that we choose to be together… and that is actually in our ceremony- that we choose each other.
I am with my soulmate now. Everyone prior to her was just preparing me to be the perfect better half and vice versa.
I think there is something of a combination , There are choices you make and they may or may not lead you to your destiny. And sometimes Destiny has to point thing out that you may have missed , the proverbial “signs”. But I have to admit there was some sort of ironic fate that caused myself and my FI to meet. But I’m very glad we did!
Harry and Charlotte are one of my top three favorite SATC couples. I LOVE them together. I’m usually very idealistic, but I tend to think that we aren’t destined to be with only one person. I never thought of it as a choice, but I really like that and think it’s a nice way to think about this kind of thing.
totally unrelated but when i read this one particular episode came to mind:
its after they are married and Harry is hanging around naked. and he’s sitting his naked butt at the dining room table….LOL…that was hilarious.
In our case, it has to be fate. It’s just too coincidental that we met, as a result of a string of other situations and decisions. Plus, we definitely never pictured ourselves with someone like each other, but on our first date we knew that we had found our match.
Faith persuades me that there was something bigger than us guiding my fiance and I together. But in the course of our three-year relationship, I’ve also had to choose to love him, regardless of how I feel about him at the moment. Love is more than a rush of emotions, and part of the reason we felt ready to get married is that we realized no matter how angry we get with eachother, we know in our hearts that we’re meant to be together.
Oh, how I love Charlotte’s dress! Definitely the most beautiful gown I’ve ever seen in any TV or movie wedding. I think I read somewhere that it was a Bagdley Mischka.
As far as the fate vs. choice question goes, I’m a practical gal and I’ve never put much stock in talk of fate or soul mates. I think our relationship works because we want it to work, and we think the other person is worth the work we put into our life together. And yet, I can’t help wondering if we were somehow destined to attend that basketball game where we met …
i think it’s a little bit of both. i think fate brings you together but it’s the choices you make that keep you together.
I don’t believe in fate. I believe everything is choice.
I believe that despite it often feeling like things are ‘meant to be,’ because I’m unromantic like that 
| Visit our sister sites | Project Wedding Wedding Songs |
eHarmony Advice Dating Advice |
JustMommies Pregnancy Calendar |
Fertile Thoughts Infertility Support |
Mrs. Jasmine, Chicago/LA
Age and Occupation: 25, Attorney
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 26, Attorney
Engagement Date: March 24, 2007
Wedding Date: June 7, 2008
Blogging Since: September 20, 2007
Venue: Hotel on the westside of Los Angeles
About Me: I'm a happy-go-lucky, imaginative spirit trapped in the body of a lawyer. I love reading, shopping, dining out, and exploring my beloved adopted city of Chicago with my fiance. We're planning the wedding of our dreams in my hometown of Los Angeles and we're excited to incorporate our cherished Indian/Pakistani customs and traditions.
| Sun | Mon | Tue | Wed | Thu | Fri | Sat |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 |
| 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 |
| 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 |
| 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 |
| 29 | 30 |
Latest Gallery Pics