Wedding Blog
I was about to craft an entire post about organization when I realized I had more important things to ask you guys about.
As a recap of the past few days: I. have. been. stressed.
Things I have had to deal with:
1) drama with the people who are supposed to be printing my letterpress invitations. Let’s just say there were a lot of raised voices, they almost weren’t going to be printed, and none of it was my fault.
2) a very, very cheap groomsman.
3) a makeup artist/hair person who is missing in action
4) decisions about ceremony music
5) photobooth people who refuse to answer their phone and don’t call me back
Yesterday I decided to work on the menus for our bar. We’re having a few signature cocktails, so I wanted to create a menu so people know what their options are. I was discussing all of this with my friend Amanda when she brought up the fact that we have no menus for our food.
Personally, I have never been to a wedding that had a menu. I really thought this was something I could let go. However, everyone seems to be making menus these days, and now I’m thinking that I should do this too. I also have to figure out how to incorporate my photo reminder cards (which I haven’t printed yet, thank god).
Are you having menus? If so, why? If not, why not?
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No menus for us. I figure that it’s just creating extra garbage (I’m not sure that’s something even I would save!) and I think I’d rather spend that money and time on other aspects of the wedding.
Plus, there’s not any decision-making for my guests–Their meal will be already decided.
Nonetheless, it can be a fancy touch to any placesetting if that’s what you end up doing.
I feel the same way– have never been to a wedding with menus, but gosh darn it all these lovely bees have such beautiful menus at their tables, and so creatively presented…
But here’s what kept me grounded… I brought it up with the groom, started describing how perhaps we could print one per table on the other side of the table number, etc… “Making them would add more stress right?” Well, yes. “And additional time and money?” Probably. “Do people need to know the fancy description of steak and veggies?” Well, no. “Forget it, your stress level correlates directly with mine; my goal in life is to minimize your stress. No menus.”
Done. =)
We didn’t have menus either. We didn’t have a meal - just heavy apps. While I suppose we could have made menu or little signs for each food station, it just seemed like an unnecessary touch.
I like menus because they’re an elegant touch and I also think they can alert guests to any ingredients that they may potentially be allergic to. Also, I just like to know what I’m eating 
But I definitely don’t hink they’re a must at all.
Yes, I am having menus. We pretty much have to because our venue does table side ordering so no choices listed on the RSVP card.
No menus just b/c I do not see the point — too much stress for that something extra that I don’t think is all that impactful.
As for the photo cards — can you print the info into your program?? This is what we’re doing…I think a lot of people hold onto the program after the wedding as a momento anyway and if you give people the idea that they’re going to be uploading their photos for you to view as early as the ceremony, I think people will be all gung-ho to get tons of awesome shots for you/of you all through the day…
We are trying to have as “green” of a wedding as possible. No menus for us! I also have never been to a wedding with menus, and would not have thought of one had I not become a WB stalker. However, I do think they look beautiful in many of the bees’ posts.
I have also been tempted to join the ranks and create menus. But alas, no menus for us either, I wrote out the food description on the RSVP next to a check box (rather than writing just “chicken” or “fish”).
Like jmochi said, it’s more time, stress, money and paper
we’ve seen them at most weddings we’ve been to lately–but we never know what to do with them and so just end up hiding them under the plate!! I don’t see the point–it’s not as though we are choosing what to eat at this point in the reception anyways and they seem to make an already crowded table even more cramped for space.
I planned to do menus to add something extra to the table and also because our meal was buffet style, so I thought it would be nice for people to see what they were eating. But, in the end, I ran out of time and didn’t want to spend another dime on another project. I was upset that I didn’t get around to it at first (I can’t believe I cared that much) but in the end I didn’t even notice.
I did menus since we had two buffet stations with different selections. Didn’t want guests to go through one line only to discover what they liked was on the other side. Several people made a b-line for the sausage platter, others avoided it! The caterer named one station Rebecca’s Station (I had mediteranian food) and the other Groom’s Name Station, (he had sausages and roasted veggies). People thought that was cute.
Ha ha. I just like your list as a “very, very cheap groomsman” — we have one of those too. It is SO infuriating. Our groomsman and his wife make over $100K/year, whereas most of my friends are in grad school making $0/year. My friends are flying in from across the country, staying for the weekend, and have not complained once. Said $100K+ groomsman has done nothing but bitch and moan about the cost of everything (which is MUCH less for him than it was when my fiance was a groomsman in his wedding).
My favorite part — immediately after complaining about the cost of a hotel room (which he is splitting with another couple) he says “Oh! I for we were jealous of your trip to Greece for your honeymoon, so we just decided to go right after your wedding! We’ll be there the same time so we can hang out!” Now I’m REALLY annoyed with him!!
No menus for us. But what I REALLY want to hear about are the other 1-5 items you had to deal with!
I dont think its a necessity at all. Who reads those anyway? People are going to be ga-ga over the bride and groom, they are not going to be reading a description of chicken and wedding cake with coffee and tea. Unless you are serving up some strange foods that need describing, leave it out.
I have to say I love menus. It’s a nice keepsake..( but I also keep all the wedding invites I’ve ever gotten ). I am making some cute menus for our wedding- but I don’t think you have to if you are not into the menu thing.
I did menus b/c I *had* to. The reception was at a restaurant and guests and 3 entrees to choose from. If not, I def would not have done them. I always see little things like that and ask “what’s a better way to spend my money?” Good luck!
Thanks, you guys.
@shellbod: do you think these are weird:
FIRST COURSE
Green Pea Wonton Soup
three wontons, accompanied with an
asparagus and parmesan salad
dotted with a spinach and honey balsamic
topped with a brunoise of fennel and caviar jell
presented with a light snow pea broth
served tableside to your guests
MAIN ENTRÉE
(based on pre-reserved entrée selections)
Lavender Seared Halibut
lifted by a crisp, butter seared potato cake
accented with a grape and truffle
mint tapenade, olive powder and topped with mache
accompanied by chinese long beans
Lime and Cashew Crusted Chicken
served atop a large mushroom and truffle ravioli
drizzled with a lime, cashew cream sauce,
topped with a mache salad
a bacon soy reduction accents the plate
Mushroom Raviolis
drizzled with a lime and cashew cream
sauce, accompanied by chinese
long beans and topped with a
mache salad
Hmmm, your menu is fancy so maybe 2 menu’s per table? One on each side?
We’re not doing menus. I don’t think they’re necessary, and it really is just a waste of paper if they aren’t picking something to eat. Save some money, save some time, save the earth.
As a pp said, we’re also putting the “upload your photo” information in the back of the program. I think this is the best way to get the info out as most people will read the program while they’re waiting for the ceremony to begin.
@Joy: @Joy: I agree w Joy, you probably only need one or two menus per table. And while your guests would benefit from some explanation of your exotic menu, I would heavily edit what you have posted there. i.e.:
Mushroom ravioli with lime and cashew cream
Chinese long beans
Mache Salad
I love the idea of putting the “share your photos” blurb in the program (stealing this). We’re not having menus, only because we’re having a buffet and people can kind of see with their own peepers what is to offer. Also, I have too many other things on my to-do list - I just don’t have time to add one more thing.
I know it’s easier said than done, but try not to stress about this. I think a menu would be nice, but it’s not at all required. Take your other projects into consideration and see if there’s a way you can consolidate to save time.
I decided to go with menus so people can plan their meal accordingly. We have vegetarians, gluten free folks, and my family members who won’t eat anything other than red meat
menu free! extra paper, waste, time, and effort for something that no wedding ive been to has had, and I have never missed at any wedding that didn’t have them.
Miss Cream Puff, you might try emailing Red Cheese photobooths . .. the owner got back to me immediately. (We are not going with them only b/c our photographer is going to set up something similar instead.) They’re at http://www.redcheese.com.
Oh, also, I think if guests have pre-selected their entree choice, I think menus are completely unnecessary. They’re a luxury add-on in my mind (though they often look very nice). They’re on my list as an “if we have time and energy by that point” item. . . .
Hi Miss Cream Puff! It is always a nice touch to include menus. Whether it is one per person or two per table, it provides guests a sense of what they will be having. More importantly, many guests are allergic to different foods…this will be a great way to let them know what they will be having! Good luck with the rest of the planning! KLG
I agree with Kelley…if you go to a restaurant, reading the description in the menu is half the fun…you want to know what you’re eating…and as a foodie, i like knowing what ingredients went into (in hopes of perhaps creating a similar dish at home)….i once went to a wedding where the salad was so delish and since we had a description on the menu, i was able to find out what was used in the dressing, etc. …….and more importantly, some people have food allergies, so menus are also a plus regarding that…
I never really thought about menus until Mrs. Lovebug did them…they were just SO cute!
My mom told me she didn’t understand why I wanted to make menus since we are having a buffet…but whenever I go to a buffet…I always want to know what everything is. I don’t eat seafood, so I always end up having my fiance take something so he can taste it to tell me if it has fish in it or not.
I think a menu would help with situations like that…and they’re cute!
No menus for us, but we opted for a buffet for our small wedding to encourage people to get up and mingle, already! The servers will be able to answer any questions about the food that come up.
If you want menus and have the time, go for it, but they aren’t a requirement. Good luck with the rest of your list!
If you have time, I would just do the two menus per table, and I would leave in ALL the food detail. It makes it more delicious that way. Also, it is fun for the guests to know what they are eating and makes for a more “luxurious” dining experience.
I don’t think we’re doing menus but our venue is going to put placards up in front of the buffet stations so people know what they’re getting into. But the venue lady said she’d handle that, she wanted to be crafty, so more power to her!
I’m doing menus simply for the aesthetic of them. I don’t think they’re necessary, but I like the look of a menu peeking out between a napkin fold. I’ll forgo wedding band shaped confetti for menus any day.
I’m doing one menu per table (it’s double-sided). I wouldn’t have thought to do a menu until I went to a wedding without them and literally could not identify one of my side dishes. Granted, that was an extreme case, but it convinced us to do it. (Then, on the other hand, I later went to a wedding where there was one menu per placesetting and that DID seem like extra waste — thus the one-per-table compromise)
I think the food descriptions you put in the comment are too long-winded and confusing (almost like one long run-on sentence). I would definitely pare them down. Also, menus generally are a waste of paper but I don’t think it would be bad to do one or two per table…
we’re thinking of doing menus. we’re foodie people. i agree that half the fun of eating out is reading the menu - a well-written menu whets the appetite and in itself can be entertaining. plus, i like to know what i’m going to be eating even if i don’t get a choice. i think the one menu per table is a good idea.
@tbwinson: I completely agree. Personally, I enjoy a meal more when I know what I’m eating and its components. I just like knowing in words what it is.
We’re also doing them because we have a cheese course and I think it’s important for the guests to actually know what kind of cheeses they’re eating (that’s pretty much the whole point of a cheese course).
No need. Our menu options will be on our website and people will have chosen what they want to eat from there in advance. Don’t feel like you have to add to your stress if you don’t want to do it!
I think we’re going to be skipping menus. I been to weddings with and without them - and for me, without is winning the debate. It’s simply one less thing to worry about, pay for, transport. Blech. I think everyone will be fine without one.
We had menus for a few reasons:
1) Since I designed our invites, I knew they’d be easy to make. I could just copy and paste some flowers from the invite design and type some text. So in adding personal touches to the wedding I decided to do this since the time involved was relatively minimal. This was the main reason.
2) We spent a little extra to get a really good caterer and we wanted people to be as psyched about the food and appreciate it as much as we did (it always sounds fancier in print). (I even included the apps and the cake flavors on the menu.)
3) We had a lot of people (all the crazy groom’s side) who are either picky eaters, allegedly have food alergies, or who keep kosher. This was a very minor reason to have menus since you could pretty much tell what ingredients were in the dishes or ask the servers.
But yeah, like a wedding purse they’re seriously not necessary. To save paper you could do one per table and put it in a frame or something.
I’ve only been to one wedding where there was a menu. It was useful because we could actually order from a choice of entrees on the menu. But otherwise, everyone tossed it aside after ordering and didn’t think twice about them.
We had a buffet, so the setup is quite different. But I asked the venue whether they’d make little table cards to identify the foods and, especially, note whether or not dishes were vegetarian. Got the impression they’d never thought of it before, but they were happy to do it!
[...] Okay, now to more thoroughly address what has been stressing me out: [...]
[...] couple of weeks ago, I had a bit of a conundrum: I couldn’t figure out whether or not to have menus. After reading everyone’s comments, I [...]
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Mrs. Cream Puff, San Francisco Bay Area
Age and Occupation: 25, Illustrator
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 31, Merchandise Planner
Engagement Date: May 27, 2007
Wedding Date: August, 2008
Blogging Since: February 7, 2008
Venue: Ceremony at Crissy Field and Reception at the Green Room
About Me: I never dreamed about my wedding as a little girl because I was too busy playing in the mud or pretending to be Martha Stewart–but now that it's here, I'm having a fabulous time DIYing everything in sight! We’re planning a very fun multicultural wedding (I'm Jewish and Mr. Cream Puff is Chinese), filled with as many personal details as I can muster.
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