Miss Pineapple, Pittsburgh
Age and Occupation: 24, Graphic Designer
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 27, Student Affairs Administration
Engagement Date: August 4, 2007
Wedding Date: October, 2008
Blogging Since: April 14, 2008
Venue: The Rivers Club
About Me: Being a transplant from sunny south Florida I am learning to live with all four seasons while playing with our cat collective, line dancing, and doing a ton of DIY projects for our wedding (seriously, like a thousand)!
We Just Know - When You Know, You Know
May 29th, 2008 @ 2:57 pm by Miss Pineapple
Mr. Pineapple and I dated “officially” for 8 months before he proposed. The first time he introduced me to someone as his girlfriend was 5 months before he proposed. I never thought that I would be dating my boyfriend for less than a year before he became my husband-to-be, but once we were there it felt like perfect timing.
Since Mr. P and worked together before we started dating, we got to see each other’s true colors long before a first kiss. I was a stubborn manager of a residence hall desk and he was my supervisor. If one of my employees didn’t show up for work and I had to sit at the desk from 4-8am, no excuse was good enough. Immediate probation. Mr. Pineapple on the other hand was the good cop who would convince me to give them another chance. I would get distracted and doodle during Mr. P’s meetings and there was the one time we had to call him and remind him that he should be at work with us rather than watching the Steelers.
The desk services team out for dinner in 2005.
For us, building a working relationship first made a loving relationship that much easier. From the first date we knew the good and the grumpy about one another. He knew I was weird and I knew he was even weirder (debatable). It scared me that several months into the relationship we had yet to have an argument. Everything was just so good, so comforting.
Mr. Pineapple was the first to say the word “wedding.” A few months into our relationship we were at our favorite hang out, and the location of our first date, Smokin’ Joes Saloon. Mr. P popped over to the juke box and a few minutes later Howie Day’s Brace Yourself started to play. Mr P. whispered in my ear “I want them to play this song when we get married.” From then on there was no doubt.
Since Mr. Pineapple and I both worked at Carnegie Mellon, often in a client/designer relationship, we kept our personal relationship fairly hushed. We told the people who mattered - my boss and his, but for the most part we didn’t want people making assumptions. This, of course, all flew out the window after we became engaged. We got a lot of shocked responses such as “I didn’t even know you were dating!” So, convincing people we were serious, and in love, was not an easy task.
Anyone else have a fairly short stint as boyfriend and girlfriend before deciding you were ready to take the plunge? What do you tell people who doubt you could know in such a short period of time?
31 Responses to “We Just Know - When You Know, You Know”
We actually knew and talked about it after a month. We got my ring setting after the 3rd month. I only told my close family of our plans. Everyone else knew it looked like it was leading to marriage but we didnt confirm it until the actual engagment. We got engaged on our 1yr anniversary! We have a 7 month engagement! 2 more months til the wedding! We can’t wait!
I definitely agree with “when you know you know!”
We got engaged after dating for just over a year, and our engagement will end up being about 5 months long. So far, this has definitely been enough time for planning! I think we got really lucky with venue availability. FI and I also knew each other before we started dating–we had been good friends for a few years. I also agree–when you you know, you know!
My fiance and I were only together 5 months before we got engaged. We actually picked out the ring 4 months in, and I was told I wasn’t getting it until much later, like 5 to 6 months later if not longer. However, the whole time he was planning on giving it to me before Christmas. At first everyone was surprised but no one gave us really a hard time, and both sides of our family welcome both of us with open arms, so I understand exactly where you’re coming from.
I knew the first time we dated..It took him a couple years to come around. We got engaged after dating the second time for 5 months. Been engaged for about 1 1/2 years. Getting married in a 1 1/2 months 
We met for the first time in May of ‘03 and we’re married a year later in May of ‘04. It was a whirlwind romance and everyone thought I was crazy. But I just knew. Today is our four year anniversary =)
We got engaged exactly 8 months after we started dating. A few raised eyebrows from some friends but those were mainly ppl who didn’t know me that well or didn’t know us together. My family and his were totally on board. When you know, you know!
we were engaged in under 3 months. one of my best friends left for Japan before she even got to meet him (I was in nervous-about-upcoming-first-date mode when she left,) so I was so afraid to tell her because I used to tell my friends they should beat me with the clue bat if I got engaged in under 18 months.
I think it was about 6 months when I got the nerve to say something over IM, and she immediately typed, “gimme your phone number! now!” (to save her looking it up) and she called immediately and said she just wanted me to hear her screaming with excitement.
I think some of our friends were a little shocked when we got engaged one week shy of our first dating anniversary. No one has actually said anything about it being too short or anything. We moved in together after 5 months, so we definitely knew very soon. The biggest shock was from our friend who has been dating his gf for about 3.5 years and still is not even close to ready to propose. They were dating for over 2 years when we met and we’re getting married in 3 months. The gf had raised eyebrows, but somehow I don’t think it has to do with us as much as them. Yes, when you know, you know.
It only took a me a couple of weeks to realize that Mr. Smithie was the one. While we had been dating for a year and a half before we got engaged, we moved in together pretty quickly. We met in February; started dating at the beginning of March; mid-March he told me that he was moving to Pittsburgh for a year, and maybe I could come with him? By April I knew that I wanted to do just that!
I think the person who gave us the most grief about timing was my boss…followed by his friends, who had seen him through several long-term relationships that didn’t go anywhere. I was lucky in that my friends and family were super supportive. And if certain members of his family had had their way, we would have been engaged that first summer–apparently they “just knew” about me, too
Oh, I forgot to mention that one of my friends asked if the wedding was so early because I was pregnant. Which I’m not.
We’d been in the sameg group of friends for years, but only dated for about 4 months before we started very seriously talking about getting engaged & married…. We actually put off the engagement just a little b/c we were convinced our (mutual) friends would freak out, as well as our parents…
I don’t know that there’s anything TO tell people who doubt or question. And I kinda think not really feeling the need to justify is part of the justification… if that makes sense?
We got engaged after 10 months, but we began discussing it after only about 4, and we picked out the ring about 8 months in. Our one-year (dating) anniversary is next week, and we’re getting married at right around the two-year mark. Honestly, i knew after about the second date — i went on a week-long vacation by myself and found myself missing him the whole time! To make matters more fun to explain to my elderly relatives — we met online. Fortunately, his family and (most of) mine can all see how much we love each other, and it hasn’t really been an issue at all.
Yeah, I’ve definitely seen a few of those people before… =)
We knew about a month after dating! I’m a firm believer in when you know, you know.
Like Miss Pineapple I met my FH at work. We worked very closely (shared an office) for a year and a half before we started dating. We dated for 6 months, got engaged this March and are having the wedding next March.
My mom likes to make jokes about how fast we got together. But I figure from working with him and hanging out, he got to see the real me (not the date mode me) long before we started seeing eachother. And I the real him.
So weird- we worked together in a residence hall office (I was the hall director, he was the operations manager) for a year before we started dating, and I would totally count that as part of our time together, even though we were both in other relationships! When you spend 8+ hours a day with someone, you get to know them pretty well…
We’ll be married in October, after dating for 2 years and 2 months. Sometimes it’s just right!
We were introduced by a mutual friend and immediately fell head over heels. FI wanted to date for a year before getting engaged so that we could “see each other in every season,” but we didn’t wait to start our life together. We had even bought a house together before I had a ring. We often say that in a different time, we would have married after 1-3 months.
We had dated for 8 months when we got engaged and we have a short engagement - only 6 months! But everything has worked out great - he says he knew on the first date. I think it took me a little longer, but not too long, apparently!
Six months of dating, six month engagement! We’re getting married one year and two weeks after our first kiss. It was probably our third date when he asked, “What do you want our grandkids to call us?” It was all over then!
And no one who knows us thinks there’s anything odd about it. When you know…
I’m not in this situation myself, but my response to people doubting your relationship would be ‘mind your own business’. Except with those who really know and love you, who (hopefully) wouldn’t say such a thing in the first place.
We got engaged after about 11 months, picked the ring out together at around 9 months, and have been certain about eventually getting engaged since about 4 months into our relationship. Our wedding will fall just a couple of weeks after our 2 year anniversary. In a way, I feel like I always known…there was never a moment when I really knew I was in love, I just always kind of loved him. Which is not to say it was love at first sight, but for us we just knew. When you know, you know! =D
We got engaged after about 11 months and planned for a wedding in 8 months after the engagement. But I knew we were going to get married soon after we started dating.
We started talking about it 2-3 months in..and got engaged at 8 months. He asked my dad at about the 5 month mark which made for 3 painful months of people taking bets on when it would happen.
My rule was at least 6 months for “normalcy” sake. Which I hate but I was also anticipating a lot of backlash…there ended up being some but not from anyone who really mattered to us.
we got engaged after knowing each other for 6 months, but officially dating for only 3 months. we knew within the first month or so. we had both been in previous relts so we both knew what we wanted. its really true, when you know, you know! i heard that phrase and never could quite grasp that concept and wondered if it would ever happen to me. but even my parents, meeting him and watching me, knew that it was different this time. there is no doubt or question in my mind and both of our parents are supportive. we’ll be getting married about 16 months after we met (so a little over a year)
We met Jan 7, 2007. I emailed my mother on Feb 9 saying I was going to marry him (she kept the email!). He discussed marriage with my parents in March, and I bought my dress that month. We waited until after his mother had met me in April before he proposed (we had already picked my engagement and wedding rings out). We were married Sept 29, 2007 - a little over 8 months after meeting. Both of our families were wonderfully supportive throughout our relationship. His was especially great considering he moved to the US to be with me. That was some pressure going to Sweden as the American fiance to meet his siblings and friends, but everything went so well. I think it’s shocking to think of marriage-inequality - I can marry my love after 8 months, but same-sex couples who have been together (and engaged) for far longer cannot marry in our state.
we know now but we’ll be waiting another four years or so.. so 8 months into the relationship we’d like to get engaged but have made a promise to ourselves, each other, and our families, to graduate college before we get married. i’m getting a pang of envy at all you 6-months brides and brides to be!!
Yeah, when you know, YOU KNOW.
We started dating in March, and were married by November. That was 26 years ago. We eloped, and I wouldn’t change a thing. He is still IT.
What a sweet story!!! The way you described what he said to you when the Howie Day song came on gave me the chills.
People always used to tell me that “when you know, you know”. I never understood what they meant by that until I met my FI. After 3 months of dating, we knew that we wanted to get married and set a date. We decided to wait until we were dating atleast 6 months to let everyone know so we secretly planned our wedding. FI proposed on the 10 month mark. We’re getting married on our 2 year anniversary (September 6, 2008).
We were engaged three weeks after we started dating, and married another two weeks after that! People thought we were crazy, except our families who were very supportive. Now that we’ve been so happily married for going on 5 years, I’ve started telling people how long we’ve REALLY been together. ;-).
I met my finace a few weeks before I left the country for 2 months to teach English abroad. He came to visit me after dating VERY long distance for just over 3 months, and proposed! We’ll be married after only knowing each other about 10 months!
On or first date, I knew I COULD end up marrying him, and by our last date, right before I left, I knew I WANTED to marry him, and when he came to visit and proposed, I was a GOING TO marry him!
I couldn’t agree more…I NEVER believed people who said, “when you know, you know”, but now I’m the one saying it about my relationship. My FH & I were dating about 3 months and then we knew.
