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Miss Onion, NYC/Burlington, VT Age and Occupation: 27, PR & Marketing and Jazz Singer Fiance's Age and Occupation: 28, Data Analyst Engagement Date: April 2, 2006 Wedding Date: September 2007 Blogging Since: July 11, 2007 Venue: Restaurant in Burlington About Me: I didn't think I'd be "that girl," but I am having so much fun planning our wedding (mostly by myself). I'm a PR and Marketing Director for a major jazz festival and camp by day, and by night, a romantic jazz singer and bride-to-be! I hope all my research can help other brides in their planning.
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What’s In Your Spouse’s Wallet?

June 17th, 2008 @ 2:20 pm by Mrs. Onion

According to an article on CNNMoney.com, a growing body of research shows that married couples are astonishingly clueless about many aspects of their financial life together. In a recent poll, four out of five respondents revealed that they hide purchases from the one they love.

spouses

See the video here - Your spouse’s money secrets: They ask couples point blank just how much they know about each other’s money.

The solution — talk to each other. The topics the article suggests you discuss are:
1) All sources of income — not just base salary.
2) Savings and investments — do you know exactly what the other has?
3) Any debts or obligations — this is a big one in long term financial planning.

Read the full article here.

How much do you know about your fiance’s finances? If you’re already married, how much do you know about each other’s fiances?

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10 Responses to “What’s In Your Spouse’s Wallet?”

1.
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Brooke

I know everything! When dating got serious, my husband (then only boyfriend at the time!) let me take over the handling of his finances, as I’d never had the opportunity or responsibility before (i.e. daddy’s credit card paid for everything). I paid the bills, put spending money in his debit account, verified purchases and paid off credit cards! It was an invaluable learning experience. Now that we’re married, I still take care of all our combined family finances, but my husband stays well informed. I tell him how much we can spend per month, and we decide where our savings goes. It’s full disclosure, and it’s a great arrangement.

 
2.
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mhb

Great post! I just met up today with my husband for lunch and we spent some time talking about… money. We have combined checking and savings accounts, but we each have our own little stash of petty cash (from overtime, etc) that we keep to spend on our respective frivolities, so neither of us feels like we can’t treat ourselves now and then.

He actually brought an article about this to my attention a couple of days ago, and neither of us could imagine not discussing something that costs more than $50 with each other.

Talking about finances is totally unromantic, but when I was growing up my parents fought about money frequently and I really want to avoid that with us… largely because those kinds of fights are avoidable.

 
3.
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Erin

Great post!

FI and bought a house pre-engagement, so it moved the money conversation up for us. But, honestly, I would have had it pretty quickly anyway. I’m very careful with my money and would have had difficulty committing to someone with serious spending issues. The conversation was actually really good for both of us - I felt comforted by his decent financial status (no savings, but excellent credit rating), and he was inspired to turn a leaf. He makes nearly twice what I do, but I had substantially more money in savings - it made him realize that he could actual save more and he has been ever since! (I should say that I’ve also needed to learn to relax, too.)

Like MHB, we try to keep each other included in large expenses, but mostly we trust each other to act responsibly. We touch base at bill paying time or when we update our long-term financial plan.

 
4.
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Leslie

We have been married just over a year and have shared our finances from day one. We have joint checking and savings accounts. We combine all of our money. We each get a monthly allowance of cash to spend, no questions asked. Everything else goes in the budget so we can track our spending. This budget has come in very handy in figuring how long it will take us to save a down payment for our first house since our expenses are relatively the same each month. We both came into the marriage with student loan debt and are working together to pay that off. My husband handles all of the financial aspects, like planning the budget and paying the bills, but should anything ever happen to him, I know how to access every account. There’s nothing that we hide from each other when it comes to finances.

 
5.
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jnicholea/thatbride (message)  116 posts, Blushing bee

We have already sat down together and planned our “retirement budget”. This has given him the chance to better plan his future, and it helped me realize how imperative it is that we save right now to be prepared for the future.

 
6.
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Alli

My FI’s obsession with Excel spreadsheets comes in very handy with this particular topic. At the end of each month I give him all my financial information (how much in whatever accounts I have and how much on my credit card) and then we sit down together after he enters it into his handy spreadsheet. We keep track of all our expenses yet to be paid off (i.e. final wedding payments) and then set a goal for the next month with how much we want to pay off and how much we want to save. We’ve been doing quite well so far and have managed to save up enough for our honeymoon which we thought we were going to have to give up (many tears on both parts involved before we found the solution!). But now we get to go to Hawaii!!!

 
7.
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sally

We know everything about each other’s finances but still maintain seperate checking/savings accounts (we have a joint mortgage account). I prefer to maintain some financial independence (as does he). Plus I never unerstood how you buy bday and other presents for each other when the accounts are all joint! ha ha.

 
8.
V
Member
V (message)  488 posts, Helper bee

everything

 
9.
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mhb

@sally: having joint accounts does force some creativity in the gift-giving department. Usually I siphon off some extra cash at a few consecutive ATM stops, or I use my little discretionary fund. There is also the occasional suggestion to look the other way at a line item on the account, though, when push comes to shove. :-)

 
10.
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Rebecca

With the wedding a few months away and recently living together the fiance and have opened a joint account for the household expenses, but still plan on keeping our own separate accounts to maintain some independence. I’m completely open to full financial disclosure, but I must admit it does make me feel a bit uneasy. Maybe being raised by a single mom and not having any example to how these things work is the reason.

 


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Mrs. Onion Miss Onion, NYC/Burlington, VT Age and Occupation: 27, PR & Marketing and Jazz Singer Fiance's Age and Occupation: 28, Data Analyst Engagement Date: April 2, 2006 Wedding Date: September 2007 Blogging Since: July 11, 2007 Venue: Restaurant in Burlington About Me: I didn't think I'd be "that girl," but I am having so much fun planning our wedding (mostly by myself). I'm a PR and Marketing Director for a major jazz festival and camp by day, and by night, a romantic jazz singer and bride-to-be! I hope all my research can help other brides in their planning.
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