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Weddingbee Blog
Hey everyone, I’m back…well to be honest I’ve been back for quite some time now (I’ve been married for a good 3 weeks) but the after-wedding blues kicked in and the desire to blog has basically been a huge flatline. Even though I will be blogging about my wedding and how wonderful, perfect and magical it was, the planning is over and it makes me extremely sad.
While I was shopping over the weekend, I happened to find the latest issue of Martha Stewart Weddings. I love MS weddings and I would buy them before I even got engaged. But with our wedding being officially over… it hit me. The after wedding nostalgia kicked in. I literally stayed at the magazine counter holding the magazine for a good five minutes, debating whether I should buy it or not. I didn’t buy it, and symbolically, it’s like turning the page, sorta. (Although I think I just might go back and buy it -I’m a Martha addict!)
Now that I’m married I feel the urge to start my own wedding related business in order to satisfy my thirst for weddings…this is a big debate for me now. I love weddings and would love to work in weddings somehow… so I feel that on top of the after-wedding blues, I am questioning my new life and what I want to do with it, career-wise.
Am I the only one feeling like this? Please say it isn’t so.
I feel the same way, to a degree. Know what’s helped? Planning a new party just for fun! It’s helped replace the “I need something to do” feeling.
Any way you can dabble in wedding stuff on the side to “get your fix?” To see if it’s right for you?
I haven’t even gotten married, yet, and I just know that I’m going to be depressed and bored after the honeymoon.
In the beginning of wedding planning, I thought, “I should totally be a wedding planner!” But after a few extremely frustrating weeks of people not doing what I asked them to do (you know, something basic like giving me their guest list in a timely manner… ahem, FMIL!), I realized that I couldn’t handle managing other people. I definitely like to plan, but when I have to count on other people to get things done, that’s when I become a micromanaging ogre.
But I still like coming up with creative solutions for table cards and programs and guest favors ~ I just don’t know where there is a need for the service of brainstorming fun/unique/crazy wedding ideas! I like June Bride’s suggestion about dabbling in wedding stuff on the side ~ that’s probably what I’ll have to do to get my fix.
I felt that way after our wedding….trust me, it will get better. I have been married for almost 4 months now and well settled into the next phase of life. I put so much thought and time into planning, that it seemed weird not to have to do it anymore, like I had so much extra time on my hands! In fact, it was like I couldn’t remember what the hell I was doing before I started the planning process. If this is your niche, then you should do what you can to get out there and make it happen. It’s not often that we are able to make a career out of something that we love and are passionate about.
Mrs. Flamingo, I just got married on June 28th, and I did the exact same thing with the latest Martha Stewart in the grocery store!!! I just barely managed to put it down. I don’t have a post-wedding blues cure yet, but it helps to know that others feel the same way. Interestingly enough, I think my whole immediate family misses the planning! We all had so much fun planning together, and now that it’s over, we don’t know what to do with ourselves!
I got married the same day you did and I thought I would feel the same. Instead, I’m sorry to say I suddenly could care less about anything wedding-related. It’s so strange because I’ve been fascinated by these events my whole life it seems and now I’m like, “who cares about your stupid florist?”
Woah! Freaky!
I’m hoping that this feeling, and your Wedding Blues, subside soon.
Oh yes. I’ve even thought of going back and getting a BFA in digital photography to be a wedding photog!!! (I can get it free too! but I’m kind of waiting for it to go to an evening/weekend model). It’s crazy but yes, I know what you mean about wanting to get into the business. I could do it in a heartbeat but am reluctant as I’m on a very stable career path right now. I guess I could start out on the side and see where it goes, but I’d have to take all of the classes first…
Don’t worry, you’re NOT alone by any means!!
I felt the exact same way, and still do seven weeks after our wedding. I didn’t miss all the stressing about vendors and seating arrangements, but I missed planning the creative elements of the wedding or having a wedding-related project to do. Wedding planning also opened up tons of new sources of inspiration beyond normal wedding stuff and into areas of graphic design, interior design and textiles, and so much more. I’ve enjoyed those things so much that I’ve been wondering if I should also consider a career change. My husband says I’m going through a “quarter-life crisis” and has encouraged me to look into options for projects on the side while I try to decide what I want to do. So, I haven’t figured it out just yet, but right now I’m working with a bride to help design her wedding programs, which has helped a lot. I would agree that wedding-related projects on the side are a good idea. You’re so talented that I’m sure you’d be successful if you decided to give it a go, but undertaking a few side projects in the meantime might help you figure out if this is really what you want to do.
I definitely miss a lot of aspects of planning the wedding, but am also glad to have my time back. I get to just hang out with the hubby, rather than thinking about colors of ribbon and floral supplies. When we watch TV, I am sitting on the couch, not on the floor with my paper cutter or gocco in front of me (unless I’m doing a fun project).
Best of all, we are more at peace now. We have rarely fought over the course of our 12 years together, but in the 6 months leading to the wedding we had several little planning-related tiffs that I can definitely do without!
I understand the urge to want to do something wedding-related as career choice. After life-long hobbying that culminated in my making jewelry and stationery for my bridesmaids and myself, I will probably start making jewelry and paper goods to sell on etsy soon. But I would give it a little more time before jumping ship from your current career - unless you have been unhappy or stuck for a while.
Most of all, I think I miss the anticipation of my wedding - being able to look forward to it, and knowing that the biggest party I will ever throw is in front of me, rather than behind me. Luckily, it was the best day of my life so far, so I can turn the looking forward eagerly into looking back very, very fondly.
I’ve been married a little over a week, and while I’m psyched the wedding went beautifully and that I had an amazing time (and that I’m MARRIED), I too am feeling rather blue. It’s hard to anticipate something that long with that much excitement and for it to be over. Luckily we’re planning a trip to South Africa in a few months.
Wow! So glad to know I’m not the only one! We’ve been married for almost 4 months and I’m still dealing with it. Truthfully I feel lost. For the last couple of years I had a very strong focus to my life. For the first year my DH and I were separated so his homecoming from deployment and my move to be with him was the driving force in my life. Shortly there after we got engaged and the driving force became the wedding. Now I feel kind of like I’m floating without some direction. I’m really hoping that starting some volunteer activities will really help. This board has also helped me! For the first couple of weeks I didn’t want to have anything to do with it because it made me sad. But now I feel like I’m giving back. I try to watch the boards and help out brides who I feel I can. It feels good to be able to share information from this side of the isle. Good luck! I can’t offer much help, but it is certainly nice to know I’m not alone.
Well you can always set up an etsy shop and sell some wedding stuff there. This way you can try it out and decide if it is for you.
Oh I’ll come work for you FOR FREE, because of my post wedding blues. wedding was almost 3 months ago, and I’m still pouring over the magazines, sites, etc. 
I feel that way too! My favorite wedding magazine was InStyle and when I saw it in the store I wanted to buy it but felt like I shouldn’t since I’m done planning. I have been seriously thinking about becoming a wedding planner since I planned my entire wedding by myself and enjoyed the planning so much.
Don’t think you are alone there are lots of us out there feeling the after wedding blues.
i feel you 100% i’ve been trying to find my niche in the wedding business. but you have talent. i’m working towards mines. i love anything wedding related. stationery, party planning/coordinating, and photography. its a tough industry. you have to have a lot of drive to keep going even when you’re told to stop.
Yeah i am not alone!!!! We got married on June 8th, and while everything was amazing and i love being married i def. got the blues.
And i have def. been shamed for it. : (
I am actually trying to start up my own wedding paperie as a fun side thing since i made all my own invites, menus, etc. 
I seriously have to live vicariously through my brides now! woot!
You are definitely not alone! I’ve always loved weddings and help out wherever I can during my friends’ weddings. However, after my own, I definitely have PTWS (Post Traumatic Wedding Syndrome via Mr. Monkey).
http://www.weddingbee.com/2007/10/22/ptws/
Like you, I wanted to maybe continue doing something related to the weddings. Unlike most people though, I am not that creative. What I like doing is the organization and execution of a wedding to ensure that all the details are perfect on the day of! Luckily, I met a fellow weddingbee reader on the boards and will be coordinating her wedding. Yea!!! If it goes well, I may continue to hire myself out for a few weddings a year to try to get over the PTWS.
I had *exactly* the same moment with that MS Weddings on Sunday (but mine happened in the magazine aisle at the supermarket). I bought a home decorating magazine instead, because we are buying a new house, and I figure that will give me something to focus on, but it wasn’t the same.
Due to unforseen circumstances, I spent an extra year planning my wedding, so it was two years total. I keep thinking about how things turned out (good and bad), like I can actually do something about it at this point. That is a long time to spend thinking about one thing, and I think it is going to be really hard to let go of. I actually considered removing all of my wedding blogs from Google reader and going cold turkey, but haven’t gotten up the nerve.
On the bright side, I am MOH for my best friend’s wedding next March, so I think I can justify going back and buying that magazine!
THANK YOU for this post, Mrs. Flamingo! I am not yet married, but friends of mine told me to prepare myself now for the weeks after as the come down can be hard. I, for one, think you are a beautifully talented graphic designer and absolutely loved your invitations and other printed materials that you designed for your own wedding. Ever think of getting in to that aspect of wedding planning? Maybe you can set up an etsy shop like mentioned above and try it out for a bit, make some cash, and see how you feel later. Never know- it may open some other doors for you. In the meantime- send us some more pictures. I am DYING to see how your big day turned out! This three weeks in waiting has been oh so long.
Oooh, flamingo, first of all, I don’t think I’ve gotten to say this yet - CONGRATULATIONS!
Now, I must say, I TOTALLY AGREE. I have been spending a ton of free time editing pictures and working on albums, so thats helped… but it will only last so long. Also, Mr. BG’s brother got engaged, and I am HOPING so badly that his fiance will want me to help. I’m itching.
Anyway, point being, I hear you. I think you’re normal.
I’ve been thinking about getting into wedding photography. I love taking/editing photos, and I love weddings, so why not?
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Mrs. Flamingo, Montreal, Canada Age and Occupation: 25, Graphic Designer Fiance's Age and Occupation: 30, Nursing Student Engagement Date: December 2004 Wedding Date: June 21, 2008 Venue: Imperia Hotel (modern chic hotel) About Me: I am a passionate designer who loves anything pretty. I heart all paper products (eco-friendly of course). My passion revolves around anything considered glamour; vintage and modern. In my free time, I love reading Martha mags, designing jewelry and making a pit-stop at Starbucks for a chai latte. I'm also a chocoholic at heart and my family drools over my homemade truffles.
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