Wedding Blog

My parents are divorced. I don’t know - I’m glad that they’re happy but I feel like they didn’t keep up their end of the bargain as parents afterward. They never talk to each other which creates a lot of logistical problems for my siblings and I. They can be civil to each other but I’m definitely not happy they’re divorced.

My parents are also divorced. They married, had three kids and then separated when I was only a few months old. I am the youngest of the three.

Unfortunately, most of my life was full of fighting, custody battles, and jealousy. My siblings and I spent 1/2 of our lives with each parent. I would not exactly recommend this approach as we did not exactly have a stable childhood. Plus, we were often in the middle of a lot of drama. Being a kid, you don’t get a lot of say in the matter.

Well, my life and my outlook on life have definitely changed now that I am older. I am able to see their relationship issues in a different light. I think it is great that you all talk honestly about your parents’ relationship, flaws and all. Key aspects of any relationship are communication and honesty. How wonderful to have found someone who you can be completely honest with, even if the things that you share aren’t always pretty.

Once challenge that I have is marrying someone from a different background. My FI’s parents are still together after 25 + years. Now, they aren’t perfect because no one is. My FI has also shared that his parents split for a while and during this time, his dad had a child. Well, guess what, they stuck it out and seem very happy. They still go out on dates, do nice things for each other, and have family outings - including those with his other child. At first I was freaked out when I found out about the “other child.” I was so afraid that if my parents didn’t work, and his dad stepped out on his mom during their marriage (even if they were separated), we were doomed.

Then, I had a reality check and realized that our relationship is different b/c we are different. And, maybe we could look at our parents’ relationships and use it as a learning lesson - something to study and not fear.

It seems like your parents have come to terms with the decisions in their life and they seem very happy with those choices. No, it is not the “happy ever after” of fairytales, but it is real life. And, it is their own version of “happily ever after.” I guess that in the end, that is what really matters.

I hope that you all continue to create your happily ever after, your own way. Stay positive and keep talking.

I am so glad that your parents are willing to put aside any differences and be there for YOU. I can’t imagine how much that means to you!
Also, I wanted to post what M&M did; You look exactly like your mother!!! B-E-A-UTIFUL!

My dad left my mom for another woman when I was a senior in college. Four years later, my mom is blissfully happy with a new partner and is much more outgoing, busy and fulfilled than she was before the divorce. What she went through was horrible, but it made her into a pretty amazing woman. Ironically, I think my dad would be much happier had he not left my mom. His new partner is a drama queen who alternates between doting on him and making his life a living hell.

I don’t know if I’d say I’m glad they divorced — my mom came out ahead, but my dad didn’t, and it was a horrible experience for the whole family. But it taught me how important it is to communicate with your partner, to figure things out as a team, and to be honest when you’re not happy with something in your life instead of letting it build to a crisis point. I like to think that my marriage has a better chance of succeeding now that I’ve learned these lessons. But I’m also encouraged by the fact that my FI’s parents are still very much in love after 35 years — it gives us a good example to follow, in addition to my parents’ bad example to avoid!

My mom and dad divorced when I was a year and a half. It was a very bad situation and I don’t regret for a minute that they divorced. They don’t and never have gotten along due to bad decisions on my dad’s part and the fact that he is very much not a part of my life.
I feel like this has also helped my outlook on marriage. We feel like divorce is not an option -for too many it’s just an easy way out. My parents’ divorce has given me much more respect for those couples who stay together and reach their 30/40/50 year anniversaries. It’s amazing, really.
Now that we’re getting married there’s a huge dilemma on my hands. When I was younger, I had separate parties for every major event of my life. Birthday parties with mom, then with dad. Graduation parties with mom, then with dad. Now….how awkward will it be to have one wedding/one shower/one rehearsal dinner/one everything with my entire family there? We’ve already had a blow-up about mom not dad walking me down the aisle. I’ve managed up until now…I’ll make it through this too…with a couple extra doses of patience.
To all of us who had gone through these divorces good or bad - we deserve the best that can come from the situation…happy marriages with the people we love more than anything that will last us through the rest of our lives. Here’s to us!