The Faux Best Man Speech!
July 16th, 2008 @ 12:27 pm by Mrs. Candy Corn
Since Mr. CC’s half-brother/best man isn’t a fan of public speaking and was absolutely dreading having to give a toast, Mr. CC asked his stepfather to give a speech in his place. Since Mr. CC’s stepfather is French, he is not familiar with the “best man speech” or what it entails. So, I’ve been gathering some tips and advice for him, to give him an idea of what is generally expected from the best man.
One of Mrs. Daffodil’s best men giving his speech
Mrs. Radish’s best man giving his speech
Here are tips according to theknot.com:
- Be prepared. Don’t think you’ll come up with something witty at the last second. You may end up staring like a deer in headlights as the wedding guests squirm in their seats.
- Speak slowly. Don’t rush through your speech, and try to speak as clearly as you can.
- Speak loudly enough for the grandparents to hear.
- Keep it brief: five minutes, tops. If you sense audience restlessness, wrap it up.
- Don’t stare at your notes–engage your audience. Look not only at the bride and groom, but at the rest of the audience, too.
- Guests expect to be entertained, so keep it sweet and light.
- Stay (relatively) sober. One drink of liquid courage may help you with your toast. Five will definitely hinder you.
Here are a list of rules of things NOT to do, according to theknot.com:
- Don’t tell ex-girlfriend-of-the-groom stories.
- Don’ t make fun of the bride.
- Don’t tell risqué jokes since old folks will be there!
- Don’t tell “inside” jokes that most guests won’t understand.
- Don’t ramble on about how you’ll miss the good old days.
- Don’t make the groom look like a slacker, loser or drunk.
That wraps up my minimal research on the best man’s speech!
What are some of the most memorable best man toasts you’ve heard? YouTube links are welcomed!
Related Posts
9 Responses to “The Faux Best Man Speech!”
at first, i was just looking at the picture, and i was so confused: “why is miss candy corn posting a picture from mrs. daffodil’s wedding?”
i think the best way to give a speech is to be aware of what you’re going to say beforehand, but not to have it fully written out or memorized. of course, you need to be comfortable with what you’ll be saying, but this allows it to be more natural and actual speaking instead of the generic reading-aloud or giving-a-speech voice.
“You may end up staring like a deer in headlights as the wedding guests squirm in their seats.” Sign. A friend was Best Man at another friend’s wedding… We told him over and over than he needed to prepare in advance, but he insisted that it would be more heart-felt if the toast was spontaneous. He totally FROZE! Another guest (a friend of the bride’s parents) finally raised a glass and quickly toasted the bride and groom… BM felt so bad that no one had the heart to say “I told you so.”
Not to end on a sour note, the best toast I ever saw was by a Best Man who followed your recommendations exactly. While I can’t remember exactly what he said, it was short, warm, and slightly funny. He smiled, made eye contact, and gave the wedding a nice little glow.
The best bestman speech that I’ve seen was where the bestman (who was the brother of the groom and was recently married himself) took it upon himself to translate for his brother what women really meant by things like “that’s fine”, “does this make me look fat”, etc. It was quite cute!
Mr.F bestman didnt even give a speak. My MOH either. Only my mom and day… oh well 
Now THIS is a toast! If only I were musically talented enough to offer such a toast to a friend.
The best BM speech that I’ve heard centered around a very brief, simple anecdote about the groom and (essentially) what a stand-up guy he was. And by extension, what a good husband he would be & likely what a good woman he’d picked out for a wife…
In fact, I think the speech made him an oft-requested groomsman b/c everyone figured he’d give more super speeches! Other speeches that he’s given though have included multiple anecdotes or lots of little points, and seem to lack that punch of a single, to-the-point story… I say: Keep it simple!
My fiance was best man in a friend’s wedding in May, and his speech went off without a hitch! He mentioned how the groom had gotten his nickname “drop the ball” when they had first started working together because he always seemed to miss or forget some important detail. He gave an example- at the bachelor party, all the guy had gone downtown to go to the bars, a 30-45 minute drive, when the groom realized he hadn’t brought his wallet! Funny stuff! But then he brought it back to sweet and said that he didn’t “drop the ball” with finding a girl as great as his bride. Awww…. 
Thanks for all of the tips & stories The musical toast thing is pretty fantabulous.
Miss Candy Corn, Philadelphia
Age and Occupation: Senior Editor/Writer & Freelance Illustrator
Fiance's Age and Occupation: 24, Student
Engagement Date: September 1, 2004
Wedding Date: October, 2008
Blogging Since: May 6, 2008
Venue: Pennsylvania Museum of Archaelogy and Anthropology
About Me: I enjoy people watching (especially in New Jersey malls), obsessive collecting, drooling over contemporary art, browsing flea markets for vintage finds and eating an absurd amount of cheese. In my Philadelphia abode, I create mixed media artwork and one-of-a-kind home accessories in the company of my farmer-tanned fiancé, our Westiepoo (Betty White), our three rabbits (Cadbury, Willie Nelson and Applesauce) and our two frisky chinchillas (Ethel Funk and Maude).
We’ve heard a rash of Best Man toasts lately that make it seem like the Best Man is in love with the Groom. So another no- no: Don’t confess unrequited amorous feelings for the bride or the groom during the toast!